Reddit reviews A Candle for Lisa

I am so sorry to hear that you have experienced the most awful loss of your son. You have carried your child for 33 weeks and given birth, then suffered a devastating bereavement. From what you say, it seems that you are not yet emotionally fit enough to return to work. I think it is important that you take as much time off work as you need to recover both physically and emotionally. Why can you not take maternity leave, since you have still given birth to a baby, even though tragically you now do not have him to care for. In the UK you are entitled to maternity leave and maternity pay (if you qualify for it) if you give birth after the end of the 24th week of pregnancy. In the UK you would also qualify for compassionate leave.

As therapists, we need to be mindful of our own self care and we need also to be in a fit enough place to offer our clients an effective service. What if a client wants to talk about their own loss or something that can trigger your own pain? You can't be present with your clients if you are worried about whether you are always going to be strong enough. It is still very early days after your loss, so you can't expect to be as strong as you would like to be yet. You need time to heal.

When you feel fit enough to see clients, then you can give a brief statement about your time off work in a way that you feel is most comfortable for you and appropriate for each client, reassuring them that you are now fit enough to return to work and offer them a therapeutic service.

For now, you may find the following helpful and supportive:

• SANDS Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Society. Website www.uk-sands.org.
  This organisation offers support and information for anyone affected by the death of a baby before, during or shortly after birth.
  
• 'A Candle for Lisa' by Debbie Ruskin. This book is about the loss of a child and the journey of recovery. Available from Amazon: Website www.amazon.co.uk . The link to the book is https://www.amazon.co.uk/Candle-Lisa-Debbie-Ruskin/dp/1873378785/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1549322728&sr=8-1&keywords=debbie+ruskin
  
  As you say, it is likely to be a long, tough road. It is a road that we cannot hurry but it is a path that can bring healing and growth as we journey along it. Wishing you my thoughts and all my wishes on your journey of healing.