Reddit reviews A Child Called It: One Child's Courage to Survive
We found 30 Reddit comments about A Child Called It: One Child's Courage to Survive. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.
Great book!
We found 30 Reddit comments about A Child Called It: One Child's Courage to Survive. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.
Texts and Reference Books
Days in the Lives of Social Workers
DSM-5
Child Development, Third Edition: A Practitioner's Guide
Racial and Ethnic Groups
Social Work Documentation: A Guide to Strengthening Your Case Recording
Cognitive Behavior Therapy: Basics and Beyond
[Thoughts and Feelings: Taking Control of Your Moods and Your Life]
(https://www.amazon.com/Thoughts-Feelings-Harbinger-Self-Help-Workbook/dp/1608822087/ref=pd_sim_14_3?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=3ZW7PRW5TK2PB0MDR9R3)
Interpersonal Process in Therapy: An Integrative Model
[The Clinical Assessment Workbook: Balancing Strengths and Differential Diagnosis]
(https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0534578438/ref=ox_sc_sfl_title_38?ie=UTF8&psc=1&smid=ARCO1HGQTQFT8)
Helping Abused and Traumatized Children
Essential Research Methods for Social Work
Navigating Human Service Organizations
Privilege: A Reader
Play Therapy with Children in Crisis
The Color of Hope: People of Color Mental Health Narratives
The School Counseling and School Social Work Treatment Planner
Streets of Hope : The Fall and Rise of an Urban Neighborhood
Deviant Behavior
Social Work with Older Adults
The Aging Networks: A Guide to Programs and Services
[Grief and Bereavement in Contemporary Society: Bridging Research and Practice]
(https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0415884810/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o02_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1)
Theory and Practice of Group Psychotherapy
Motivational Interviewing: Helping People Change
Ethnicity and Family Therapy
Human Behavior in the Social Environment: Perspectives on Development and the Life Course
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
Generalist Social Work Practice: An Empowering Approach
Publication Manual of the American Psychological Association
The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook
DBT Skills Manual for Adolescents
DBT Skills Manual
DBT Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets
Social Welfare: A History of the American Response to Need
Novels
[A People’s History of the United States]
(https://www.amazon.com/Peoples-History-United-States/dp/0062397346/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1511070674&sr=1-1&keywords=howard+zinn&dpID=51pps1C9%252BGL&preST=_SY291_BO1,204,203,200_QL40_&dpSrc=srch)
The Man Who Mistook His Wife For a Hat
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time
Life For Me Ain't Been No Crystal Stair
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
Tuesdays with Morrie
The Death Class <- This one is based off of a course I took at my undergrad university
The Quiet Room
Girl, Interrupted
I Never Promised You a Rose Garden
Flowers for Algernon
Of Mice and Men
A Child Called It
Go Ask Alice
Under the Udala Trees
Prozac Nation
It's Kind of a Funny Story
The Perks of Being a Wallflower
The Yellow Wallpaper
The Bell Jar
The Outsiders
To Kill a Mockingbird
Or this. But that one's just depressing as hell.
Probably my favorite book that was forced on me during school. It became one of my favorites, it's the book that inspired me to no longer just accept whats given to me, but to challenge it with my own thoughts. Going to read the two others, as I never knew they existed.
Spoiler from book, a fairly graphic one
I can't remember his name(I should read it again), but when he was at the Givers house he asked what happened to his brother. The Giver showed him a tape(This is kinda cloudy, may not have happened?) he found out that because he wasn't born perfect his brother was aborted and thrown away.
/spoiler
This is what made me realize that I need question what is socially accepted. I saw so much of the book that reflected on society and what we do just because it's what we think is good/right. This was quite the revelation for a 7th grader. In many ways this book caused me to gain free thought. It may have taken many years for that, or I could be like many and have remained a sheep. Nothing will work forever.
This book is now banned in the school district that I read it in :(. The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, Anne Frank were also banned.
Come on, kids these days are worse than ever... They don't need to be cuddled and kept under a secretly blanket. Reading about suffering, pure hate, racism, sexism, rape gave earlier generations shape and perceptive. I remember when I read a book called 'A Child Called it'. The book was a real life story inspired by "one of the most severe child abuse cases in California history". This Child parents, even his "innocent" father were human garbage. It made me realize that I should never complain or bitch about anything to my parents. I had great parents, they didn't deserve grief from me.
It's part of a book series by Dave Pelzer written about his own experience with a horrifically abusive mother. It's very tough to read, but a really eye-opening story.
https://www.amazon.com/Child-Called-Childs-Courage-Survive/dp/1558743669
I know this is satire but this is the type of fucked up person that learns to identify as "it."
https://www.amazon.com/Child-Called-Childs-Courage-Survive/dp/1558743669
Have you ever read "A Child Called 'It'," by Dave Pelzer? It sounds like your step-mother was trying to do something akin to what this guy's mother did.
I'm kind of curious if you've read "A Child Called It". It may bring up uncomfortable memories to do so now.
Just a thought but I imagine you probably wet the bed because of the abuse. It's pretty common I think, regression can be a symptom of trauma. Concerning your sisters, it sucks, but not uncommon. I've heard of cases where one child tends to be the scape goat of a family, the other kids are practically indoctrinated to believe the same. Also, it could be the case that they don't have a good idea what was happening to you, and you don't know all that happened to them. You probably know bits here and there, but we all have our secrets, and parents like this are exceptionally good at divide and conquer.
You might want to read the book A Child Called It which details one of the worse child abuses cases in California. There is some controversy, as some of his siblings said he made it up, but he was taken away from his family, at a time when child abuse wasn't really recognized (co-incidentally we're talking the 70s).
>I do agree that people are reacting with far less rage because it's about my mother and not my father, and I will admit that part of the reason I'm torn about talking about this is that it is a lot weirder to admit to mother abuse than father abuse.
Which is one of the reasons that I think not only has abuse by females (aka 'mothers') -- and especially their abuse of daughters -- has been much more prevalent in the past than people are willing to admit, but that currently (recent decades) as a percentage of total overall abuse, it has probably been increasing (if only because I do believe that awareness -- even paranoia -- has substantially reduced abuse by fathers/males).
BTW, while it is a different form of "abuse" -- there is a book with the title "A Child Called It" about a boy who had a horribly physically and emotionally abusive-neglectful mother -- all the BS about "motherly instinct" somehow precluding women from ever being abusive is just that, BS. Mothers both CAN and in fact many DO abuse their children in an even broader and more pervasive and damaging way than their Fathers do.
I once read a book called, "A child called it". One of the most upsetting books out there. Nauseating. I wanted to find that parent and beat them down.
http://www.amazon.com/Child-Called-Childs-Courage-Survive/dp/1558743669
Have her read "A Child Called It". She may have saved that child's life, and certainly if DFS was able to act immediately, the child is better off out of that situation. How many children suffer because people noticed but don't act? She is not the one who "broke up a family"; the abusers are.
CPS exists mostly for children that are victims of their parents, wouldn't you agree?
The almighty wiki:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_abuse
Here's a good book: https://www.amazon.com/Child-Called-Childs-Courage-Survive/dp/1558743669
//www.rainn.org/statistics/children-and-teens
www.google.com/amp/s/www.theatlantic.com/amp/article/272459/
r/raisedbynarcissists
The only book that has ever brought tears to my eyes was "A Child Called It" by Dave J. Pelzer.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1558743669/ref=redir_mdp_mobile/192-2859731-1270100
It was the saddest and scariest book that I have ever read, and it is based on the author's life as well. :(
http://www.amazon.com/Child-Called-It-Courage-Survive/dp/1558743669
Here you go.
You're not alone
Wow... it's horrible to imagine what some children have to endure.
If you really want to know... read the book A child called It
A child called it
Amazing story of a kid who survived the kind of shit that killed this child. He somehow grew up normal enough to be functional in society, and was even able to write about his experiences. The worst part of the book is where you find out that this WASN'T the WORST case of child abuse that that State had seen....
Oh, jesus, he threw you down the fucking stairs? That's some 'A Child Called It' shit right there. I'm not making light of it, that's horrible.
Yeah, Australia is quite nice from what I hear. I have a few friends who live in New Zealand who seem very happy with their living situation.
Is there any way you can get out now? Like, literally right now. Why are you waiting until you're 21?
A Child Called “It” by Dave Pelzer
I'm in my fourth year of a clinical psychology doctoral program, training to be a therapist.
How did your therapists try to treat your "symptoms"? That is, what kinds of things did they say to you or ask you to do? I ask this because when I read "...will quickly shift the focus from dealing with my past to treating symptoms of the disorder that therapist has diagnosed me with," my immediate thought was "They were all CBT therapists"--bad ones, unfortunately. DBT is indeed considered to fall under the CBT umbrella. The "pre-fabricated lesson plans" are known as manualized treatments and are most often associated with CBT (although other types of therapy sometimes use manuals too).
That said, CBT doesn't need to be so rigid. What country do you live in, and what is your health insurance like? What settings did the therapists work in (private practice, college counseling center, hospital, etc.)? Some of these systems encourage the diagnosis-based, symptom-focused, manualized approach because it resembles medical treatment, tends to be brief, and is allegedly scientific (somewhat true, but it's complicated).
If you believe you might benefit from a one-on-one version of DBT, by all means seek out a CBT therapist. I'm not bashing it in any way; it's very effective for many people. Tell them up front about your previous treatment experiences and what you are looking for in therapy. If the therapist won't work with you, find someone else.
If you don't get any traction with CBT, there are other choices. Client-centered therapy, psychodynamic/relational therapy, and critical psychology approaches are all very good options. I'm going to tell you a little secret: specific therapy techniques only account for 10% of therapeutic outcome. The quality of the therapeutic relationship contributes 35%, "client factors" (e.g. motivation) contribute 40%, and the placebo effect contributes 15%. (We just went over this in class today, so the numbers are fresh in my mind!) Look up the common factors hypothesis if you want to know more.
Sorry for the wall of text. I hope at least some of this info was useful. You suffered unimaginable abuse. "I'm so sorry" doesn't begin to cover it. Not since A Child Called "It" have I read anything like this. I'm just as sorry that your previous therapists did not help you.
My husband was hated like you were. Have you ever heard of book called "A child called It"? https://www.amazon.com/Child-Called-Childs-Courage-Survive/dp/1558743669
What happened to you is beyond horrible. Please know that we are with you 110%
Very awful. "A Child Called It"; which is an extremely depressing book I had to read in grade school for some reason. About this kid that was made to be his mom's slave. The only time she was nice to him for a tiny bit was after she accidentally stabbed him (though she didn't take him to the hospital).
You might want to read this series... the guy is grown now and it might give you some insights.
http://www.amazon.com/Child-Called-Childs-Courage-Survive/dp/1558743669
I'm sorry for your situation if true, and I respect your privacy, but it's a little hard to give good advise on such vague details.
> physical abuse is worse than psychological punishment by an order of magnitude.
I've never read anything more absurdly WRONG-HEADED in my entire life. *
--
Also interesting how you reveal your bias & utter clueless-ness of the problem here; lets just do one very simple "switcheroo" shall we?
>physical punishment is worse than psychological abuse by an order of magnitude
Now how does that sound? Still think it's true?
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>I'm not a psychologist
That's more or less a given isn't it.
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>but it doesnt take much to realise that hitting your child will be ingrained permanently in their mind, compared to say, depriving them of video games
I see, so ALL types of "psychological punishment" (or was it "psychological abuse"?) are EXACTLY the same as "depriving [a child] of video games."
BTW how long are you "depriving" them? A week, a month, a year? Permanently? Were the video games simply locked in a cabinet? Were they thrown out in the garbage? Were they "destroyed" in front of the child before being discarded?
Do the games belong to the parents? Or were they the "personal property" of the child? And then how/from where were the games acquired? Did the parents purchase them? Were they "gifts" {extra sentimental value} from some favorite relative? Perhaps there was a divorce or even death of a parent, and the game was a "last gift" from the now absent parent? Alternately, did the child perform work and save to purchase the games? How much work, how much effort did they put in & how long did they need to save to acquire it? (ALL of those things can be very LARGE factors -- especially in the mind of the child.)
--
Do you see -- do you even have the ability to conceive -- that you are "conflating" an entire ARRAY of behaviors, some of them quite ABUSIVE (even arguably VERY "traumatic" in some instances; particularly if it is a permanent loss of personal property that also has significant sentimental value) -- as if they were all equally benign?
Oh, I see, you didn't intend your statement of "depriving them of video games" to include anything like a permanent ban, much less the actual destruction of the game... you would probably even go further and claim that you would never take such a form of "depriving" the child of anything to such an extreme.
But the reality is that there are parents who WILL -- who in fact DO (*) often take things to that extreme (and beyond). And you have just given them "cover" for doing so. You have just categorically declared that ONLY "physical" forms of discipline are "abuse"; and that -- by definition -- "psychological" forms of discipline are merely "punishment"; are "temporary" and non-"traumatic" etc etc etc.
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* Your punishment/sentence -- act of contrition & education (EDIT: BTW that's a lame attempt at "humor") -- should be to go get a book titled: "A Child Called It" Get a copy, read it, and then come back and tell me again (if you dare, and I think you won't) that you STILL think any/all forms of "psychological" punishment are always benign, harmless, and non-traumatic, or an "order of magnitude" better than even a slight "swat on the butt." (To be sure the child in question also endured physical punishment AND horrific abuse; but you go and ask him what was WORSE, what was more TRAUMATIC and damaging to him: the physical or the mental, emotional & psychological "punishments" his sadistic mother dealt out.)
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** And alas, I know of several different instances of parents who engaged in very ABUSIVE psychological "punishment" of the type you advocate/recommend (just more "extreme" than you think you mean) -- they believed they were "paragons" of moral virtue, since they never even "spanked" their child once (see how PURE they were?) -- no never laid a hand on the child, but they so DAMAGED their child in other ways, were so BRUTAL and "authoritarian" and yes "abusive" in mental, emotional and psychological forms (including the wanton destruction of the child's "personal" property -- almost gleefully/sadistically and all out of proportion to the ostensible "offense" -- the child's crime? Getting a "C" on a report card!)... So much so, that the adult child (on recommendation of therapists) has entirely DISOWNED the parents, cut off ALL contact, permanently. And yet of course that parent still insists that they not only "did nothing wrong" but that they in fact "did everything JUST right" -- exactly how they were supposed to -- why? Because they thoroughly believe (and use as cover) a statement almost identical to your own: that "psychological punishment" is trivial, etc.
You see, just as YOU conflate ALL forms of "physical" discipline with "abuse" -- THEY conflate ALL forms of "psychological" discipline (regardless of hor traumatic or abusive it may be) as "benign" even "beneficial" and... what was your wording, oh yeah "temporary effect" and "clearly positive."
The solution is NOT to lump everything together -- making it "illegal" to say "deprive a child of a video game" -- will NOT solve the problem of the abusive parent anymore than making it "illegal" to "spank" -- ABUSIVE parents will STILL be "abusive"... they will simply move on to some other "games people play" {like "See what YOU made me DO" always a favorite of abusers} and thus some OTHER form of controlling/sadistic and "abusive" behavior (under the "cover" of whatever it is that is then advocated as an "acceptable" method, whether it is "reasoning" {which becomes self-esteem destroying "nagging" & "berating" -- often justified simply by creating a scenario for such via demands for "perfectionist" behaviors, and "perfect" outcomes -- like "all 'A' grades on a report card"}, or "time outs" {which becomes permanent grounding, then permanent confinement to a room, no telephone, no friends, etc}, or "depriving" them of other things {no cookies for you, EVER again; no TV watching; no music; no toys, etc}.)
ABUSIVE people will be ABUSIVE -- under ANY method.
And conversely, REASONABLE people will be REASONABLE -- again under ANY method (including, yes, "spanking" their children only when necessary, and in a manner that is NOT "abusive.")
A Child Called It is one of the most painful reads I have ever done, but it's an amazing story of survival.
www.amazon.com/Child-Called-Childs-Courage-Survive/dp/1558743669
If you haven't read it, and in the same vein as this, I HIGHLY recommend reading A Boy Called It. It's heart wrenching but amazing.
I don’t know what your native language is, but in English you don’t call people “it” unless a specific person has specifically requested it. Maybe read A Child Called “It” and you’ll start to understand why it’s degrading and dehumanizing to refer to a person as “it”.
You're not automatically entitled to free tuition. You can figure out a way to pay for school on your own or become a bitter loser. Your brother took advantage of your parents and they're not willing to let it happen again. Are you going to prove them right or wrong? If you're so smart, get some scholarships and go to a state college.
If you think this is being "treated like shit" you need some fucking perspective. Read this.