Reddit reviews Dataclysm: Love, Sex, Race, and Identity--What Our Online Lives Tell Us about Our Offline Selves
We found 24 Reddit comments about Dataclysm: Love, Sex, Race, and Identity--What Our Online Lives Tell Us about Our Offline Selves. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.
Broadway Books
That came from data pulled off OkCupid and you can read more about this and other findings in Dataclysm, which was written by OkCupid founder Christian Rudder. It's actually a very interesting read and it covers trends in behavior beyond just that which applies to dating or attractiveness.
It's worth noting that the same data showed that a vast majority of men find women most attractive between the ages of 18 - 23 or so whereas women were pretty consistently attracted to men with a few years of their own age. There are also a lot of variables that affect what metric they're using to gauge "attractiveness" so I would take that figure with a grain of salt.
A large percentage of men don't even put much effort into their baseline appearance, either because they don't want to, don't have to, or don't think to. If we're talking about looks and looks alone, then I'm not entirely surprised. Maybe it's not 80%, but if you're comparing one group of people who have been conditioned to put a little extra effort into their appearance, to another that hasn't, or has even been discouraged from doing so, then I could see why perceptions of attractiveness would skew in one direction more than the other.
Basically, don't take a line from an OkCupid blog to heart.
If you take a look at the book OKCupid's founder wrote (Dataclysm) he makes the point that men's ratings for women are normally distributed, but women's ratings for men are a power law distribution.
The attraction graphs look very similar to ones that I saw in a book I read recently -- Dataclysm: Love, Sex, Race, and Identity--What Our Online Lives Tell Us about Our Offline Selves. It's written by the co-founder of OkCupid, so loads of the data came directly from there. That's what the OP graphs look like to me. You can use the "look inside" feature and search for "attraction"; page 47 has one of the graphs I'm referring to.
A lot are clearly copy and pasted. If it doesn't reference or ask about something in my profile, I don't bother responding.
If you're interested in this sort of thing, you should read Dataclysm.
If you think OKTrends was cool, you should read Christian Rudder's new book, Dataclysm! It's amazing.
In fact, everyone in this sub would probably be at least somewhat interested in this book.
Some thoughts
One thing that got me thinking was his slide on the how and the why. Basically the chart looks like this:
Advice | Reason |
--------|-----------|
confidence | risk taking |
charisma | social hierarchy |
competence | provisions |
leadership | overall survival |
Talking to a stranger is risk taking. Having good charisma makes you seem higher up on the totem pole. Who gathered the most animals? A big question in women's hypergamous brain is who have the most provisions.
This got me to thinking about how I would develop social confidence? "The most important mark of confidence a man can do is to start a conversation with somebody... approach, approach, approach." (@~34:00)
So I brainstormed:
Advice | Reason | Action|
--------|------|--------|
confidence | risk taking | Approach
charisma | social hierarchy | Work in Bar/Meet Ups/ ...
competence | provisions | Job/Budgeting/Investing/show dangerous side...
leadership | overall survival | Get in Leadership Positions/Volunteer...
How feasible are the actions? Approaching can be done today by going outside, but I am [insert hamstering] and she is [hamstering]....
Here are the books he recommended @~40:18
Shows what men and women want.
Advice:
Become keen observers of human nature and behavior based on reality. One way is to take walks with your dog, sit at a cafe and eavesdrop on people on dates.
He also recommended getting social history books and getting a book list together. Not sure if the list above is the list or a quick glimpse.
Background:
Man is dying. I saw him on reddit offering free advice and skype sessions before. I thought there may be a catch and I was insecure. Fast forward today I see him on the stage, I wish I have taken up the offer
and am thinking about spending a day with him. Usually never have someone like that in my life, wonder about how a day with him would be like. Crowd in the room are tired and silencing his side jokes, but sometimes the
crowd (or one person) comes alive and responds. I would of been stoic/quiet/beta (on and on) in the audience, but would fantasize about his points. At end no one seem to have questions so he have to probe the audience "anyone want to know about my eye patch?"
questions around @48:00
etc.
It's not a conspiracy guys.
The old blog posts and research projects were mostly from one of the cofounders - Christian Rudder. Who has a BS in Mathematics from Harvard.
OkCupid was sold in 2011. (Though I think Christian Rudder did occasionally still post there.)
He went on to compile and expand on the themes from his OkCupid blog posts, in his book "Dataclysm."
https://www.amazon.com/dp/0385347391
Check it out. It's a fun read.
The book is Dataclysm. See my post below.
Dataclysm
There is a book about it: https://www.amazon.com.br/Dataclysm-Identity-What-Online-Offline-Selves/dp/0385347391
Hrm, that's from this book ? Another way to put it is that women are conditioned to respond that guys are generally not attractive based on a photo whereas men give a more broad distribution that encompasses a full scale ("she's a perfect ten"). There's also quite an industry around giving women makeup and a rigorous education about how to make themselves photograph/appear more attractive/cover flaws that most guys (at least those who would be evaluated by women) aren't exactly indoctrinated with.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0385347391
if want more depth, I recommend the book where the info came from:
https://www.amazon.com/Dataclysm-Identity-What-Online-Offline-Selves/dp/0385347391
I found the book in the most useful Internet website after pornhub: libgen.io
Someone posted this book here months ago. The books is written by the (co-)founder of Okcupid himself. He shows with numbers and statistics what we've talked about here for years.
The book from which this TIL originated.
N por the OKCupid studies was in the hundreds of thousands. The guy running the studies is a freak of statistics. Granted, is still slanted by people in online dating, but the N is so big that you can make conclusions at least about internet-based dating (which is very popular in many countries, nowadays the most common way to meet people).
His book: https://www.amazon.com/Dataclysm-Identity-What-Online-Offline-Selves/dp/0385347391
Read Dataclysm by Christian Rudder if you want a more rigorous analysis of the differences in dating approaches for men and women. Or just read some of his blog, OkTrends. The short version is, this video is absolutely representative of gender's role in online dating, regardless of attractiveness.
Why would you need to? The top commenter was saying the belief is the result of selection bias in popular culture.
If pop. culture caused us to legitmiatly see Scandanavian people, for example, on the street and believe them to be more beautiful on average how would that somehow invalidate OP's question?
OP is essentially asking a question about the role of certain social constructs. If you don't believe the construct exists fine, but we can go out and measure it via surveys and see if it does if we really wanted (and I assure you someone already has). The founder of OKCupid, Christian Rudder, wrote a book (Dataclysm) detailing all the beauty and attraction data they gathered on the dating website. It makes the case pretty solidly that some races/ethnicities are considered more attractive. Whether that's good or not is not really the point.
Hijacking top comment to note that the founder of OkCupid wrote a fascinating book on this phenomenon. It's called Dataclysm and was my favourite book of 2014.
https://www.amazon.ca/Dataclysm-Identity-What-Online-Offline-Selves/dp/0385347391
See also:
https://theblog.okcupid.com/race-and-attraction-2009-2014-107dcbb4f060#.noikefokj
>Because OK Cupid is definitely the best measure for dating right?
Uh, yeah. It's the only measure we have.
>I still haven't seen a source.
Since you're too lazy to type a few words into google:
http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/your-looks-and-online-dating/
There was even a book published by the guy who founded OKC who talks about dating and dating trends like this:
http://www.amazon.com/Dataclysm-Identity--What-Online-Offline-Selves/dp/0385347391/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1462480969&sr=8-2&keywords=ok+cupid
It's pretty common knowledge at this point. Surprised you haven't heard about this until now.
Dataclysm: Love, Sex, Race, and Identity--What Our Online Lives Tell Us about Our Offline Selves.
Price: $10.87
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>As someone who has worked in research in the past
Sure, carrying a clipboard and harassing people in front of Costco gives you real authority on the matter. Here's a book by the same people that did the study. Since you're "in the biz" maybe it'll be interesting to you.
>Also, you may be any level of ugly, unless you are actually disfigured, there will be people interested on you as long as you have an interesting personality - it doesn't matter how much you say the opposite.
Well funny how I haven't found any of them. Must be my shitty personality, eh? Here's my OkCupid inbox from a few years back where I've used some normie's photos instead of my own, and my original (and rather long) profile content. I also tried the same profile content with my own pics, and hardy got any messages (and those that I did get were not friendly or flirty). Conclusion: F A C E
>first, it is because of society, then I show it's not
You didn't show me shit, you just said what you believe with nothing to support it.
>it's because men are not picky, then I show it's not true
You didn't show me shit, you just said what you believe about yourself.
>then it's because I don't flirt with women, then I show I do
My experience in flirting with women outpaces yours quite a bit. It's just that you don't have the kind of face that repulses people.
>then you know women better than they know themselves, and you know more about flirting than anyone else
I'm an authority on how women react to me. Unless they can detect my horrible personality with their sixth sense (that somehow fails to detect hooking up with an abuser), then they are completely and identically uninterested in me whether I flirt or not and whether I talk or not. Conclusion: F A C E
>And the reason for all of that? Because you cannot accept, not even for 1 second, that maybe, just maybe, your personality and behavior play a role in how people react to you too, and you could spend sometime working on yours just like you've spent 13 years in a gym.
Sure, I accept my personality is (or has become) shitty too, but is it so shitty that no one's ever loved me and it's just a coincidence that my face is ugly? Funny how that works. And funny how a shitty personality is not a barrier for good looking people to get in a relationship.
>I have no time for this victim mentality man, nor does anyone else. Have a good night.
Homophobia: doesn't exist.
Racism: doesn't exist.
Sexism: doesn't exist.
Any person who's being discriminated against should work on their personality instead.
OP it has nothing to do with politics in its outlook, but for the effects of gender and race based biases in practice, check out the book Dataclysm, but the Chief Information Scientist at OK Cupid: https://www.amazon.com/Dataclysm-Identity-What-Online-Offline-Selves/dp/0385347391
You should read Dataclysm, written by one of the OkC founders, somewhat insightful.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0385347391?tag=randohouseinc10100-20
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I've read them all; they've helped a ton^1000
Uh huh, thanks. Just relating personal observation but I appreciate your input.
EDIT: Just to be particularly specific the 20% stat is my recollections from this book which is very much based on very real statistics from the founder of OKC who had unfettered access to all of the data their user base coughed up. It's eye-opening.
What the fuck you talking about you fucktard? I have data to prove my facts.
It’s from a book called
Dataclysm. written by the founder of one of the largest online dating websites in the world. Used millions of interactions bewteen males and females to figure out amazing things.