Reddit reviews DBT® Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition
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Texts and Reference Books
Days in the Lives of Social Workers
DSM-5
Child Development, Third Edition: A Practitioner's Guide
Racial and Ethnic Groups
Social Work Documentation: A Guide to Strengthening Your Case Recording
Cognitive Behavior Therapy: Basics and Beyond
[Thoughts and Feelings: Taking Control of Your Moods and Your Life]
(https://www.amazon.com/Thoughts-Feelings-Harbinger-Self-Help-Workbook/dp/1608822087/ref=pd_sim_14_3?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=3ZW7PRW5TK2PB0MDR9R3)
Interpersonal Process in Therapy: An Integrative Model
[The Clinical Assessment Workbook: Balancing Strengths and Differential Diagnosis]
(https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0534578438/ref=ox_sc_sfl_title_38?ie=UTF8&psc=1&smid=ARCO1HGQTQFT8)
Helping Abused and Traumatized Children
Essential Research Methods for Social Work
Navigating Human Service Organizations
Privilege: A Reader
Play Therapy with Children in Crisis
The Color of Hope: People of Color Mental Health Narratives
The School Counseling and School Social Work Treatment Planner
Streets of Hope : The Fall and Rise of an Urban Neighborhood
Deviant Behavior
Social Work with Older Adults
The Aging Networks: A Guide to Programs and Services
[Grief and Bereavement in Contemporary Society: Bridging Research and Practice]
(https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0415884810/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o02_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1)
Theory and Practice of Group Psychotherapy
Motivational Interviewing: Helping People Change
Ethnicity and Family Therapy
Human Behavior in the Social Environment: Perspectives on Development and the Life Course
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
Generalist Social Work Practice: An Empowering Approach
Publication Manual of the American Psychological Association
The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook
DBT Skills Manual for Adolescents
DBT Skills Manual
DBT Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets
Social Welfare: A History of the American Response to Need
Novels
[A People’s History of the United States]
(https://www.amazon.com/Peoples-History-United-States/dp/0062397346/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1511070674&sr=1-1&keywords=howard+zinn&dpID=51pps1C9%252BGL&preST=_SY291_BO1,204,203,200_QL40_&dpSrc=srch)
The Man Who Mistook His Wife For a Hat
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time
Life For Me Ain't Been No Crystal Stair
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
Tuesdays with Morrie
The Death Class <- This one is based off of a course I took at my undergrad university
The Quiet Room
Girl, Interrupted
I Never Promised You a Rose Garden
Flowers for Algernon
Of Mice and Men
A Child Called It
Go Ask Alice
Under the Udala Trees
Prozac Nation
It's Kind of a Funny Story
The Perks of Being a Wallflower
The Yellow Wallpaper
The Bell Jar
The Outsiders
To Kill a Mockingbird
Hi! I'm sorry to hear about your struggle, it sounds like you're going through a lot of emotions related to her.
The go to treatment for people with bpd is dialectical behavioral therapy, or otherwise known as DBT. I very much recommend that you try to get your daughter into a DBT program. As for how to deal with her, I think the validation section of the dbt workbook would be incredibly helpful for you, and also interpersonal skills such as SET and DEAR MAN.
Best of luck to you and your daughter!
TL;DR Dieting and fasting changed the appearance of, but did not solve, my disordered eating, food addiction, or food obsessions. No matter what, make sure you are being gentle and kind to yourself!
Personally, I turned to keto as a solution for my binge eating issues - One can only eat so much straight butter before one really feels 'done' after all ;) - but I recently saw a post on one of the keto subreddits that may resonate with you. The post suggested that "solving" disordered eating via a restrictive diet wasn't really a "fix" for those disordered attitudes towards food. Instead it's like a floppy band-aid: it might work at first but you have to heal the underlying wound, band-aid or no. And I'll be damned if for me, that wasn't absolutely right. I have had to be honest with myself: For some of the 3 or so years that I've been eating keto, my disordered eating didn't disappear, it only looked different. Since I started keto, it has looked like obsessive thoughts about food with sprinkled instances of my previous disordered patterns. I thought perhaps this would resonate for you with what you mentioned about ending your fast with a candy binge.
For me, I'm now experiencing a tension between "I would prefer to reduce my carbs to keto levels because I legitimately do feel better physically and physiologically when I don't eat carbs on a regular basis" and "but demonizing carbs hasn't actually caused me to recover, and I still turn to food for things that really aren't about hunger or nourishment." It's a fine line: I found myself obsessing over keto just as much as I had ever obsessed about food while in the throes of my unhelpful eating patterns.
Since this realization, I've found a couple tools that I hope will be useful. One is that I have cultivated the habit of using a handful of mood and behavior tracker apps, which help me be honest and mindful about how I am feeling on a given day. Pacifica is popular, and I also use BoosterBuddy. Booster Buddy prompts you to do 3 self-care tasks each day. It sounds trivial, but for some reason it really does lead me to be mindful of ways I can nurture myself, and ultimately I find I nurture myself more often and more effectively. Trackers won't by themselves cause your food obsessions to go away, of course - but I've been finding that if I start my day with a couple gentle, low-investment nudges towards self-care, then other good things tend to follow.
Another tool I'm using is DBT (dialectal behavior therapy.) Basically, it is a behavior-based therapy that is rooted in mindfulness without judgment of self or others. It has a few core tenets, which include the idea that 1. all behaviors are caused and 2. everyone is doing the best they can with the tools they have at any given time. You might be able to find DBT groups locally (and I really do recommend them in a group setting!) or you might be able to find a therapist for DBT one-on-one. I'm hopeful that an honest look at the role of my eating habits will enable me to find more effective solutions to the problems for which I have been using food. This is the specific tool that I used during my first experiences with DBT. It's meant to be used in a therapy setting, but I'm trying it out by myself. It includes worksheets to help you identify the specific patterns you are trying to change, as well as alternative strategies for situations that might trigger problem eating. DBT has been found to be effective for many folks with eating disorders.
Sorry for the wall - I really empathize with what you have written. For what it's worth, I believe in your ability to move through your eating disorder with compassion and in a way that feels good to you. :)
I think for most people some parts are obvious but it would be easier if we all knew it and used it as a playbook. If you’re interested you can find the workbook on Amazon: DBT® Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572307811/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_nhcFDbDRAYEDQ
I went through it as part of treatment for an eating disorder, although less formally than usual. I think traditionally you do a lot of group meetings in a short, intensive period of time. But reading it at my own pace is helpful too.
Edited to add: the interpersonal skills section is essentially exactly like what my company pays good money for someone to come and teach us as “leadership training”
> If this goes on for days, I progressively end up in a more depressed/helpless state. Making decisions gets difficult, even something as simple as picking an item off a menu. Confidence at work or with any other hobbies gets low enough that I stop doing or achieving much of anything.
This is a very classic "freeze" response, also known as dissociation. Basically, if you're pushed into fight/flight long enough or persistently enough, you'll start freezing up. That makes it difficult to concentrate, difficult to connect to other people, and even difficult to take concrete actions like picking something up. It's one end of trauma-related emotional disregulation, with the other being fight/flight/anxiety/anger. It's very common for unchecked verbal aggression to put people into a state like that. It's also decently likely that you have some form of trauma history that made you more vulnerable to freezing up like that, and that made it difficult for you to get angry enough to push back when she becomes verbally aggressive with you. I'd suggest reading In An Unspoken Voice to learn more about how we get stuck in these fight/flight/freeze responses.
> The only consistent recommendation I see, besides medication, is DBT. What does that mean, for someone without good access to medical care? Buy her a workbook and tell her to read it?
You could try to do that, but it doesn't sound like she has either a lot of insight into how her behavior is harmful or a strong motivation to change. Most likely the best thing that you can do is to focus on improving your own ability to advocate for yourself, to understand what's happening in this situation, and to get clarity about your own conscious and unconscious patterns of thinking and reacting that keep you stuck in this situation. This is unfortunately a "put your own oxygen mask on first" kind of situation.
On another note, DBT might actually be really helpful for you. One area it covers is emotional regulation, or learning to work on your emotional responses so that you can respond in a way that fits the situation. That includes learning about the different basic emotion types (Anger/Shame/Fear/Guilt/Envy/Happiness/Sadness/Love/Jealousy), learning when they fit the facts of a situation, and also learning to recognize when you're skipping past the appropriate emotional reaction and jumping to another one. For example, it sounds like when your wife gets angry at you over nothing, you skip right past anger and into fear/shame/sadness. If you can afford it or are covered, it might be worth finding a DBT therapist to help you work on that. If you can't, this is the workbook that my therapist used with me.
> What can a person like me do to be more resilient to verbal aggression/abuse?
Learning to set boundaries for yourself is probably the key skill to get started with. There's a lot of confusion about boundaries out there. Sometimes it sounds like it's something that other people are responsible for ("they should respect my boundaries"), or that they're responsible for enforcing them once we communicate them. Instead, a boundary is an action that we commit to take ourselves in order to maintain our self-respect and ability to function. It could be something like "If someone is yelling at me or calling me names, then I will leave the area." Frequently, it's helpful to have a series of planned boundary-maintaining actions so that you don't have to take drastic action off the bat -- so in that example, you could plan to first ask the person to stop yelling, then leave the room if they won't stop, then leave the house if they follow you and keep yelling, then stay somewhere overnight if they keep yelling when you come back, then move out temporarily if they won't stop when you come back, then end the relationship if you can't come back without being yelled at.
Other times when people talk about boundaries it sounds like we should just already know what our boundaries are, when in reality it's a really messy difficult heart-breaking process to discover first that something is unacceptable to you and then that you're willing to enforce a boundary to prevent it. There may be significant new emotions or memories of past situations that you have to become comfortable with in order to -- for example, you may be deeply uncomfortable with the idea of being alone or seeing someone else suffering when they claim that it's your fault, and it may be related to difficulties in your childhood or past that seem similar.
There's also a significant chance that you've internalized at some level that you're responsible for your wife's emotional reactions, or that you've done something wrong, or that this is normal. So there's a significant ongoing rediscovery aspect where you'll revisit past relationship conflicts and go "Wait, that's not my fault at all!"
The other thing you can do is to look into whether you might be exhibiting codependent behaviors or in a trauma bond. No More Mr Nice Guy is a decent guide to working on this, although it's a little bit much to handle if you're still in the thick of it emotionally. You can also read When I Say No I Feel Guilty.
> What's the healthy approach towards me getting some kind of support system/network?
Keep on posting here regularly, for one. You can also take a look at /r/Divorce (I've been assuming from the comments from your friends that you're married -- apologies if I'm getting that wrong). I assume you've seen /r/BPDlovedones/ , but it might be worth reading their recommended resources. Work on exercising regularly, see a therapist or couples therapist if you can, try talking to any friends you have that haven't been dismissive before. A light 10-20 minute/day meditation practice might be helpful with learning about your thoughts and emotions, but there can be complications with large amounts of meditation if you have a trauma history or are in a stressful situation (see this book and this guide if you want to pursue that route).
Also just spend time with friends and social groups even if they're not resources for talking about your relationship. It can be important to remember that social relationships can just be fun/light and to provide a counterbalance.
> So... is there any healthy middle ground between "suffer through it, don't talk about it, relationships take work" and "run away, AWALT, borderlines are crazy"?
The middle ground is to work on asserting your boundaries, understanding and accepting your emotions, building a healthy set of activities and friends, and getting clear on what's acceptable to you. If it turns out that you have a trauma history, then something like somatic experiencing or EMDR can help you start to heal from that and become more confident. As you become more confident and assertive, set more boundaries, and work for the kind of relationship that you want, then you'll see w
Do you have kids together? If you don't, the standard answer to just go ahead and leave is probably "right" -- there doesn't sound like there's much good happening for you here. But the problem with "just leave" is that it's all or nothing, and doesn't provide you with an incremental path to building the skills and self-knowledge that will allow you to actually leave.
If you do have kids together, then "just leave" is definitely a bit tougher. This sort of situation can be a kind of crucible that allows for immense personal growth, or can just beat you down.
A couple resources that may help with clarifying the stay/leave question are:
Good luck and we'd love to keep on hearing how you're doing!
Yes. Very helpful. It’s good for anyone who’s been through traumas. My son and I are both in separate therapy programs based on DBT. I suggest you get this book and explore; its great to have professional guidance, but the book is very common sense and practical so you can get a lot out of just the book.
DBT® Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572307811/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_u1R2CbM1383VN
Also see if you can find free pdfs (they're around) of:
http://www.schematherapy.com/id202.htm
https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Edition/dp/1572307811/
Tomorrow or something I'll dig up those files from whatever Fb group I found them on and put them on dropbox or something :)
We're all a little nuts here :) I'm happy that you, too, are trying to work on it and improve your life, and I wish you the best of luck!
If you're interested, my husband started DBT a few months back with his therapist and has been using this workbook, which seems to be helping him. We also just discovered this series of posts, which helped him express some things to me and helped me to conceptualize what's going on in his head and what I can do.
I approach therapists the way I do online dating. Instead of looking for things I want, I look for red flags and stop the conversation there.
I think not wanting to be on meds shouldn't be something to focus on if your mind is set, and if they seem like they want to push on that, it's not going to be productive.
Does the therapist talk more then you do? For me, that's a deal breaker. I don't want to hear anecdotes or a long explanation of their credentials. I want to be guided, not lectured. Maybe personal preference.
Note how "challenging" the therapist is with you. Do you want someone who will push back against you/call you out (this is extremely helpful in many cases), or do you want someone with a more subtle approach? I'm personally sensitive to criticism so I need a lighter touch.
Does the therapist seem to have negative attitudes or limited experience regarding groups you belong to? LGBT, POC, bipolar patients (I once had one for couples therapy whose ex husband was bipolar; that didn't work out), age, gender, etc.
In your sessions, with a tight budget, you want to maximize efficiency. You need to target the most impacting areas of your life so you can get the most overall improvement from your time there.
They're going to want to know what your current most pressing issues are. Bring a little list of ways your bipolar has impacted your life.
Also see if you can identify the most important/relevant details from your life history so you can quickly give them background information. "I was raised in city, my family was generally supportive/dysfunctional/close/etc., I've had these experiences with therapy in the past, these three events changed the course of my life, I was diagnosed years ago, my worst manic/depressive episode was like this..."
If you want to get into DBT, read about the four major aspects about it and see if you can identify the part you want to focus on the most. I highly recommend getting the official manual. Using part of your budget on this will help you further your therapy along on your own between sessions, making therapy more targeted to your needs based on your own progress. (Sorry for formatting, I'm on my phone.)
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1572307811/ref=sxts_1?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1501518111&amp;sr=1&amp;pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65
Good luck!
DBT stands for Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. It is a treatment developed by Marsha Linehan, originally to treat chronically suicidal patients and those with Borderline Personality Disorder. It has since been shown as an effective form treatment for many other diagnoses as well, such as those with PTSD, substance abuse, mood disorders, eating disorders, and ADHD. Those who seek DBT are frequently those who experience intense emotions and emotional distress. It is made up of four components: mindfulness, emotion regulation, interpersonal effectiveness, and distress tolerance. A typical DBT program consists of a once-weekly 2 hour DBT group that lasts 6-12 months, a once a week therapy session, and the ability for the client to have access to their therapist via phone for phone coaching.
Hope this helps. Let me know if you have any more questions!
THIS book has everything you need. I would recommend starting with mindfulness (the book has all of the skills and handouts as well as the worksheets/homework associated with them). Then work through the other modules (Emotion Regulation, Interpersonal Effectiveness, and Distress Tolerance) in any order. If you're in a bad place now I recommend starting with Distress Tolerance because that is the most immediately useful.
Most DBT classes introduce one skill per week and assign the associated worksheet(s) as homework. You can work through the skills at any pace you'd like but I like having a whole week to focus on practicing and using a single skill.
Are you familiar with Dialectical Behavior Therapy? It was based on CBT and has a large mindfulness component. It's an empirically supported treatment for many presenting problems, as well.
This book and [this book] (https://www.amazon.com/Mindfulness-Solution-Intense-Emotions-Personality-ebook/dp/B0197SJPDI/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1523374715&amp;sr=8-5&amp;keywords=dbt+book) might be helpful and along the lines of what you're looking for.
If you buy this book, you can get all the pdfs from the workbook for free through Guilford Press.
I haven't read this one, but it seems to be the recommended book if you want to learn more about DBT conceptualization.
There's a therapy called DBT. You can buy the book from Amazon (there's a manual and a workbook most people recemmend from Dr. Linehan). but here's a pdf that someone from this group linked up (can't recall who or I'd give them daps) that looks like a nice overview and it's free wooo lol. Learning about this therapy has given me soooo much hope. I hope it does the same for you!
You can just google it but here it is
There could be cheaper options but that’s the price I paid for mine.
It sounds like living with your dad might be the best of those 3 options. You'll still be in contact with the girl you like but you wont be challenged with as many changes. BPD is EXHAUSTING, I know. I find that the solution that is driven as equally as possible by both logic and emotion fits best. Suicide may seem like a good third option, but remember that there is always a possibility for even more options than you listed. I would sometimes confront that idea with "I''m pretty sure I've explored every option and angle and this is all I got", and I did....with the information I had at the time. Group therapy helped me with finding more options to help solve my problem from my peers and from the ppl running the group. I think it's important to be open to gathering up more information on what you can do and what support you can get. This forum is the perfect place!
Also, Dialectical Behavioral therapy (DBT) is extremely usefull in treating BPD. You can find a number of online resources and workbooks to help you. There are also DBT group therapies out there that take insurance or do sliding scale. I'll link the books below. Some of the worksheets inthese books can be found on forums or other websites for free, uploaded by wonderful ppl that just wanna give ppl access to something helpful.
Book 1: DBT® Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572307811/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_C12QybM6GZ5PF
Book 2 (my personal fav): The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical DBT Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation & ... Tolerance (New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572245131/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_w22Qyb6Y42T7S
This is the one I used
DBT® Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572307811/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_0m80AbYQFE8AA
Dialectical behavior therapy, mentalization based therapy, transference focused therapy - all created for people like us. With the diagnosis you can now know that other people suffer in the same ways you do, it's not hopeless, and you're not doomed to a life of being alone. I was in therapy for 10 years before confirming the diagnosis and starting DBT - I've made more progress in the last year than I ever did in those 10 years. I think probably there's nowhere to go but up.
DBT workbooks:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572245131/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_JBD3zb2DPCBBR
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572307811/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_qnD3zb1J2N742
When I was waiting for therapy to start I soaked up as much info as I could in video form on youtube, which I actually found more helpful than DBT in terms of feeling real validation and emotional healing.
I found a torrent of From Chaos to Freedom which is basically Marsha Linehan (creator of DBT) teaching the skills herself. I like her, she’s pretty weird. Here’s a clip: https://youtu.be/Im3aLArs2nc “If it lasts forever and you think it’s a crisis... it’s your life, it’s not a crisis”
Tons of short videos of experts talking about borderline and DBT:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC0RQwa3uLto4y2R8Eg1hKTg
This one is full of lectures (many by the same experts) on more specific topics that I really liked:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDSIYTQX_dk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvfe3n2SGow
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ux8-7EniZBM
best DBT book according to my psychiatry friends: https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811/ref=pd_sbs_14_1/139-5353406-3502968?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=1572307811&pd_rd_r=4fb2861d-38c1-4afc-be43-6fae090049ac&pd_rd_w=Xf2WI&pd_rd_wg=bBImX&pf_rd_p=52b7592c-2dc9-4ac6-84d4-4bda6360045e&pf_rd_r=DX6BXR3YASDREKBZ4EBE&psc=1&refRID=DX6BXR3YASDREKBZ4EBE
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i'd recommend breaking up with him on fb, or even better, breaking up with facebook. life will be better that way.
i wish you way more than luck, be well!
Hi there again, I checked with the people who brought out the German DBT book I told you about. They recommended this and this one I really believe and trust that they know what they are doing.
DBT Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572307811/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_cE1KBb34H8RG9
It’s not a “game” book and it’s not a “help” book it’s a fact driven very helpful book. Different skills apply to different people but it’s for sure worth a look. Maybe even take a class for real and get all that nasty shit out of your system. For real, you deserve someone in your life dude.
A type of CBT that has been very helpful for me is Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. Instead of "therapy," it's called Skills Training. This book has worksheets that walk you through the process. https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1536895624&amp;sr=8-1&amp;keywords=DBT+Skills+Training+Handouts+and+Worksheets%2C+Second+Edition
Disclaimer: I'm not a therapist. If anything comes up that is too much for you, get in touch with a professional. This may be something you shouldn't do in your own.
However, this is more for the emotional side of things, Reactive Dysphoria, etc. So, YMMV.
The two I found the most useful are This one which is the first one I started with. Once I went through that book I then got This one along with the manual. I then got myself this diary to keep track of using the skills.
I didn't find all the activities helpful, I think it's about picking and choosing what feels good/works best for you.
My therapy group uses DBT Skills Training Manual by Marsha Linehan
I asked my therapist for the name so I could see about getting a copy for myself.
Edit, there's also a companion book that's just the worksheets that are used. These are activities and homework we get assigned. link
Do you have this one ? From what I've seen, it seems to be the gold standard of DBT workbooks. It's by Marsha M Linehan who apparently struggled with BPD herself before going on to pretty much found DBT as we know it. I'd recommend starting with that.
I'm in a DBT group and we learn skills from this book https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1495915692&amp;sr=8-1&amp;keywords=dbt.
I learn the skills more in a group than from the book itself. But I've never encountered anything spiritual.
Part of DBT treatment is learning to accept things as they are (as opposed to how you think they should be) ... so perhaps choosing to ignore the spiritual aspect and focusing on the parts that work best for you is a DBT skill in itself.
Certainly! CBT is really helpful too, and there's a bit of crossover between it and DBT.
DBT is a pretty intensive program, usually to do it the way Linehan sets it out requires individual therapy and group therapy but the literature has recently shown some benefits to just the skills portion (the work that's usually done in an individual setting) of the program.
This is what we used for ourselves and clients when I was learning about DBT DBT is pretty proprietary so a lot of the stuff is way more geared towards training therapists, but the skills manual is probably the easiest to grok as a client-recommendation.
Talk with your therapist too about incorporating DBT, they might have more ready access to the materials needed. ACT is a little more user friendly in regards to accessibility for clients and personal work and covers pretty similar ideas.
Oh and Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) and Mindfulnesses Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (MCBT) also cover some of the same ground too, and are easier to work into a running CBT program. Those might be helpful to bring up too.
Sounds good! I think it's extremely beneficial to learn with professionals. I have worked with several counselors at my IOPE setting and a few therapists on my own. In IOP they were using this book: https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811
I bought a copy myself and have continued to study/reflect/practice the techniques. Opposite action in Emotion Regulation has been the most useful to me.
> Schizophrenia - Hood - Unpredictable - Bipolar - Intense
I'm being snarky. I have bipolar disorder and this is part of the homework I have to do for my counselor. It's not a very interesting aesthetic.
Number one, take a deep breathe and tell yourself that you are still you. You haven’t suddenly changed into someone else, you haven’t lost you’re identity. You aren’t bpd. You have bpd.
Number two, but these two books: DBT® Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition https://www.amazon.ca/dp/1572307811/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_c_api_Uk80Ab8EPAW4R
The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Wellness Planner: 365 Days of Healthy Living for You... https://www.amazon.ca/dp/1936268868/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_c_api_tl80AbV4W8531
They will be super useful for your dbt. And make sure you do dbt! It’s life changing and is honestly the biggest, best treatment.
Number Three: ask yours loved ones to do their research. There are tons of great books out there, if they can understand your disorder they can be a support for you.
I hope this helps. I just know those are things I wish I had known a lot sooner.
I have that workbook. It’s super helpful. My therapist also recommended the one by Linehan , who created DBT, I believe. It’s the one my therapist uses. It’s in my Amazon shopping cart right now so if you buy it first, let me know if it’s worth while! I’ve done several pages out of it but I haven’t flipped thru the whole thing yet (obviously, since I haven’t bought it yet lol)
I have this http://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1464376228&amp;sr=8-1&amp;keywords=dbt+handbook
It's a workbook. It's supposed to be group therapy type of class, but I could not do that (I went to a few sessions), because DBT is the recommended treatment for BPD, so I'm guessing there were people with BPD there, and the group sharing just set me on edge and didn't feel safe for me to share and heal.
This is the DBT course with the handouts I'm working through at my university. So it depends what you're looking for. https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811/ref=pd_cp_14_1?_encoding=UTF8&amp;psc=1&amp;refRID=R1574PF8PDV1BQKJ85KA
Even though I've worked with a therapist throughout my entire healing journey so far, she did encourage me to do DBT self study with this book: https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811
It concentrates a lot on mindfulness and emotional control. It's been really helpful, and probably something you could do successfully on your own.
First of all, sorry for responding so late. I saw your comment, but didn't have time to really sit down and give it the attention it warrants. Here is my reply:
This is an excellent and one of the most important points. Unfortunately, health care in America sucks in general and this is even worse for mental health due to a lack of understanding on the part of insurance companies about the nature of mental illness.
I do not have a great answer to your question because I've never really looked into it. There were some sites that seemed like good places to start that I found by Googling around:
NAMI HelpLine
SAMSHA
These are just other general thoughts/ideas:
-If you have insurance and are not really sure what's covered, call them and ask. You'll get a good idea of what's covered, what the copayment is likely to be etc. Even if the copay is more than you can afford, that is not necessarily the end. Many mental health practitioners operate on a sliding-scale which means they have some flexibility in terms of copayment.
-Look into universities or hospitals in your area. They often have clinical trainees or researchers who can see you for a reduced fee or even for free (e.g. in exchange for participation in a research study).
-I was going to say go to your local place of worship, but I am not sure how connected to mental health resources temples and masjids are.
-If you're a student with or without insurance, go to your campus counseling center and talk to them. They usually know practitioners they work with who have cheaper rates for students.
-If you don't have insurance and you aren't a student, there are hotlines or centers that might be able to help you get health insurance. I am not knowledgable of this process, but Google or asking on other subs could help.
-Depending on where you live, there can be support groups offered in the community. It isn't ideal, but you'll receive some form of support and it may help connect to other resources.
-Finally, sometimes seeing a therapist is just not an option. Whether it's due to just not being able to afford it, or maybe you live in an area that lacks mental health resources. In those cases, I could think of a few things.
You can find support groups on the internet. Not necessarily Reddit, but there are entire forums dedicated to people who experience depression, anxiety, substance abuse issues, etc. I'm sure there is a range of variance on the quality, but you should never discount the power of social support, even if it's not through a physical medium.
The other approach is self-education about mental health. Even though I put it as the last option, this is definitely one of the most powerful ones. There are a lot of great books and research papers out there on mental health, understanding specific disorders, and full clinical manuals. Some of these are not really accessible to people outside the field, but a lot of these are meant for the average consumer. You need to be careful because there is a lot of crap out there too. Check reviews, make sure the source is evidence and research based. This one is so critical. Through decades of research, we have a good understanding of many disorders, as well as the treatment approaches that are effective for them. It's important to consume content that is based on these scientific methods. If you need help deciding which books are good, again Google around or perhaps go to a psychology-focused forum and ask for opinions. One good approach is to read books written by the people who actually developed the therapies! Here are two good examples I like:
CBT for Depression
DBT
I fully realize that when you're struggling with a problem, you may feel that you don't have the physical or psychological resources to try to take this approach. But you should always know that this choice is available to you. It's something that you can try. Maybe it will help, maybe it won't. But it will definitely not hurt you.
So, to avoid future confusion, CBT is Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy and DBT is Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (usually used for people with personality disorders). Maybe using the full names instead of the acronyms will help clarify for them? CBT would be in the style of Ellis, where DBT is from Linehan, if they know about theoretical founders. The two are incredibly similar.
DBT does require quite a bit of training to do properly, and it's done in groups, not individual sessions. However, you can send him to this book which will provide him the resources he'd need for using this piece of the treatment. Also, it depends what qualifications your therapist has- when he goes to do his continuing education credits, he can specifically look for CBT-based sessions.
Psychodynamic is quite different from CBT or DBT. I'm surprised you found a psychodynamic provider who takes Medicaid, honestly. Usually psychoanalytic and psychodynamic are out-of-pocket only. Psychiatric hospitals tend to have something called "Intensive Outpatient Programs" (IOP) which accept Medicaid and will train you in these skills. Another resource, if you really want to try that approach and your therapist does not provide it is to go to Psychology Today and they will let you enter your zip code, type of therapy requested, and which insurances you need the provider to accept, and it will tell you who is available in your area.
Typically DBT is supposed to use group and individual DBT therapy in concert, so if they're not doing that, they're already doing less than the
ideal setup.
Here's the book we used at the DBT place I went to - which was a yearlong committment of individual and group every week. The book actually delineates that as well. It sounds as if they're not quite doing DBT in the most effective way, so you may want to look into another office.
I strongly suggest using DBT still if possible - It really is designed for our sort of issues (aka learning to adult after shitty parents ruined everything), and after the full year program, I don't need meds anymore. I'm still not 100%, but I'm fairly certain I never will be. But not needing meds was a huge improvement for me!
I have anxiety, OCD AND ADHD!
seems like there's some info being omitted. in any case, read this book, both of you:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572307811/
"Skills for improving mindfulness, interpersonal relationships, emotion regulation, and more"
I have been diagnosed with BPD officially for a year now. Prior to that I was misdiagnosed with Bipolar 2. Honestly my experience with medication hasn't been great. I totally hear you about feeling like a lab rat. Currently I am on Guanfacine, which is normally an ADD/Autism med meant to curb impulsivity. I have been on anti-psychotics, mood stabilizers, and anti-depressants all of which were minimally effective and had shitty side effects. However, I HAVE SEEN MARKED IMPROVEMENT since I have started a Dialectical Behavioral Therapy program. DBT is similar but different than CBT, and was specifically designed for BPD. It is essentially Buddhism meets Western psych. I CAN'T RECOMMEND IT HIGHLY ENOUGH. I went through an intensive CBT program before starting the DBT program and didn't see any results despite a lot of effort. The entire point of DBT is learning skills to manage your reactions to triggers. You can control your brain not the other way around. I linked to the wiki page about DBT in another comment, but here's kind of the run down. A PROPER DBT program will consist of two parts, group therapy and individual therapy. In group therapy you discuss and learn skills meant to help you regulate emotions, increase stress tolerance, decrease vulnerability to triggers, and improve interpersonal relationships. You use a textbook, current edition here: https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811/ref=pd_lpo_sbs_14_t_0?_encoding=UTF8&amp;psc=1&amp;refRID=FY8PYY4YF8P0KGPYH603
and you work through the worksheets and diagrams as weekly "homework". Mindfulness exercises are also a part of group therapy, often in the form of a guided meditation. In individual therapy you work through problems you are facing in your life and see when/how to apply the skills you are learning in group. Focus is on how to deal with current issues and triggers rather than digging really deep into why you have BPD, so if you have co-morbid PTSD you should be ok ( although it does deal with how to apply skills to thoughts/feelings brought up by past trauma). Again, I CAN'T RECOMMEND IT ENOUGH. Also, be careful of half-ass programs. Like I said a proper program with have both Group and Individual therapy. Often, there are Group programs floating around on their own, which are more support groups than skills training. Do your research on a the place providing the therapy before diving in to ensure it is the full skills training. I also recommend this book: https://www.amazon.com/Buddha-Borderline-Recovery-Personality-Dialectical/dp/157224710X it was very inspiring.
Can I link to amazon?
https://www.amazon.ca/dp/1462516998/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_pDDSzbAZH6YEN
Edit: So this is the manual I linked here first, but I actually have the workbook
Workbook:
DBT® Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition The Gui... https://www.amazon.ca/dp/1572307811/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_awdo_.BHSzbMNT5YF1
Oh, this was the wrong link. This one is better: https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811
The handbook is more for therapists, and the worksheets are for actual DBT practice.
Hope this helps.
I used this one, her skills book and the videos (took a look, but not sure where the whole package is) Cognitive-Behavioral Treatment of Borderline Personality Disorder https://www.amazon.com/dp/0898621836/ref=cm_sw_r_other_awd_DI03wbY8QRFNJ
This one is I think more general DBT® Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572307811/ref=cm_sw_r_other_awd_UJ03wb5V1P12Q
There's a lot of controversy here, I won't lie. People are pretty divided over her efficacy. All I know is that I was diagnosed at 17 with BPD, in recovery at 19 and missing most traces of the issue by 21.
No problem! If you’re interested in looking over some of the material beforehand, you could check out this book. It’s the skills worksheet book for DBT by Marsha Linehan, who invented DBT
In my experience DBT has a lot of handouts and worksheets. We use these in our DBT class:
DBT® Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572307811/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_0CWIDb9C5AVHD
That being said, your therapist will help you work through that past trauma. Don’t worry, it will come with time.
I’ve really enjoyed this book as it uses real world examples to apply DBT skills to. It’s geared towards women but works for anyone:
Stronger Than BPD: The Girl's Guide to Taking Control of Intense Emotions, Drama, and Chaos Using DBT https://www.amazon.com/dp/1626254958/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_IEWIDbVCQ3RCW
I have this book and I have purchased this one as well: DBT® Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition https://www.amazon.ca/dp/1572307811/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_O8XmDbZZSRVZM.
I found it to be very helpful as well. It can be bought with the manual but I found it to be unnecessary as it seems to be mostly for the doctor who is using the workbook with clients.
https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=dbt+skills+training+linehan&amp;qid=1565178986&amp;s=gateway&amp;sr=8-1
this?
I haven't heard of that! It sounds like a good resource. It's awesome that you have people in your life with the knowledge and awareness to suggest something like that. I would have loved to have had that kind of support from the people around me as a teenager.
I've been using this workbook.. I really like it and find it useful. There aren't really explanations for the purposes or research behind the various exercises in the book, but it's great for building practical skills for "crisis management" and diverting damaging thought patterns.
I totally resonate with this. I just started DBT interpersonal effectiveness, and the first part was about understanding what my goals are in any interaction. I mean to tell you what, that information itself was life changing for me. If something is bothering me, I now have tools to go down a checklist and decide if it is something I want to address with the other person. And tools to do it effectively so that I can get my needs met in a healthy way. Your feelings are always valid, but not always the best guidance for what you want to achieve. If you can, look into DBT groups in your area, and if not, even just get yourself the workbook by Marsha Linehan and start reading it. The stuff is super simple (so far) and I have had so many lightbulb moments. Here is the book I have: https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1519038450&amp;sr=8-2&amp;keywords=dbt+workbook
I agree, CBT is the way to go, or DBT, a sort of cousin to CBT, depending on your needs. DBT works better for, say, someone suffering from narcissistic personality disorder or borderline personality disorder, which is often accompanied by some form of depression.
This book can work well if you can't afford a therapist. What state are you in? If you have some kind of health insurance, you can check Psychology Today's therapist search tool and find someone near you who takes your insurance. Search for your insurance and CBT/DBT specialists.
We've come a long way with understanding the brain and how it works, and CBT/DBT is the culmination of decades of good research and study. It's not a new-age-y get-healthy-quick thing, it's a real method for healing emotional unwellness and it's worth your time to learn about it.