Reddit Reddit reviews Driven to Distraction (Revised): Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder

We found 49 Reddit comments about Driven to Distraction (Revised): Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.

Attention Deficit & Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder
Mental Health
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Driven to Distraction (Revised): Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder
Driven to Distraction: Recognizing and Coping With Attention Deficit Disorder
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49 Reddit comments about Driven to Distraction (Revised): Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder:

u/stealthgyro · 13 pointsr/offbeat

Didn't think it was real, my dad never put much thought into ADHD. Wasn't until a couple years moving up in my career, someone called me out on it and told me about a book called "Driven to Distraction". Year or so after listening to that audiobook finally went to the doctor. That dude was reading a crystal ball when it came to some personal habits yadda yadda yadda....

u/lindygrey · 13 pointsr/relationships

His doctors may also be hesitant to treat his ADHD effectively because many of the drugs that do also cause mania and mania is much more dangerous and harmful than not getting shit done for a while.

I'm ADHD and bipolar and it's a fucking train wreck. You sound so pissed off about this, I'm sure he reads that and when someone is always mad a you regardless of how hard you try it's pretty easy to just quit trying.

My doc used this example:

Two sets of parents both had kids with ADHD who had shitty grades. One set of parents told their kid they would take away their phone, their car and ground them if they didn't get their grades up in a month. The other set of parents told their kid that if they got their grades up they'd get him a new car.

Which kid do you think actually got their grades up?

Neither kid did. It just wasn't in the kids power to do it, no amount of punishment/reward would help the kid because they were asking the kid more to do more than they were capable of doing.

Read [Driven to Distraction] (http://www.amazon.com/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1375056151&sr=1-1) to get a better perspective of what he's dealing with.

But mostly remember that the biploar and the mania treatments work against each other. Maybe as his moods become stable his doctor will step up the ADHD treatment but I can't imagine a doctor trying to treat mania and ADHD at the same time. It's always mania first then, when someone's been stable for months, treat ADHD.

u/itsajelly · 6 pointsr/AskReddit

Please read this book!! I know people on both sides of the medication fence and only you and your son and his doctors/teachers can make the right decision. I'm glad you are being proactive about this now, you sound like a caring and attentive parent.
Anyway, I'm a teacher and this book helped a lot with my understanding of people with attention issues, including myself! Driven to Distraction

u/guldilox · 6 pointsr/funny

Glad you got diagnosed and are doing so much better now.

Similar story for me. I wasn't diagnosed until ~29, though. I sometimes sit and wonder how much better life would have been had I been diagnosed back in college, or even in HS. But instead I just exhausted practically every SSRI and SNRI that my doctor would prescribe, to no avail.

Some 8 counselors / psychologists and 4 psychiatrists later, I got diagnosed and life has been night / day better ever since.

One book recommended to me was "Driven to Distraction" by Hallowell and Ratey: http://www.amazon.com/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152

It isn't exactly the most well-written book ever, and it is hardly perfect by any means, but never have I ever read so many accounts and experiences that I completely related to. It was very eye-opening.

edit: I should add that none of my psychologists and psychiatrists up to that point even mentioned or considered Adult ADD as a diagnosis. Furthermore, I was actually part of the group that thought, "ADD isn't real. People are just lazy. etc.". With the advent of that diagnosis at 29, I even laughed at my counselor and said that I thought ADD was a joke. I pushed forward anyway, because I had tried everything else. I was pleasantly surprised and have since reversed my stance since.

u/chasan22 · 5 pointsr/ADHD

Check out p. 27 here

In her diagnostic interview, an ADHD woman says:
>I was slow to learn how to read, but once I did, I was a voracious reader. Little Women, The secret Garden, Hans Brinker-these were my books. On top of the water tower, under the kitchen table, wherever I could find a spot to be left alone, I'd tug a book out of my pocket and read.

It is NOT true that if you can concentrate and focus enough to read, you cannot have ADHD.

Source: Driven to Distraction: Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder by Edward M. Hallowell M.D. & John J. Ratey M.D.

Edit: formatting, grammar.

u/alabastercandymaster · 5 pointsr/ADHD

It gets better if you understand exactly what it means to have ADHD. You'll feel empowered if you read up on the subject.

I recommend you

u/aknalid · 5 pointsr/Entrepreneur

Hey dude.

I can relate quite a bit.

I have the attention span of a gnat on cocaine, so I can definitely relate to the overall tone of your post.

I am going to give you a different perspective than all the other commenters...

Here are my initial impressions:

1.) I am guessing your job is not 100% predictable and there's a decent amount of unpredictability in the day to day activities? That's probably why you are doing fine in that role. Also, since you also run the risk of losing your paycheck (i.e: loss aversion) if you don't perform provides you with a decent incentive to keep showing up and producing results.

2.) Regarding your difficulty of learning and motivation: This provides more evidence about your ADD tendencies. It's not that you are not motivated or don't want to learn, it's just that your brain is wired to chase shiny objects. If you are not stimulated in conversation, work, or any other task at hand - no matter how important others deem it to be, you simply TUNE OUT.

3.) Based on everything you've said thus far, I am going to put forth the following theory:


You grew up in a very dysfunctional / precarious family environment and your relationship with your parents aren't the best. If anything, this was certainly the case in the first few years after you were born. ADD/ADHD is not a disorder, rather, it is a phenotype.

Actually, it's more accurate to say attunement deficit disorder than attention deficit disorder because one of the biggest factors of it is from your mother not giving you proper attention as a baby.

I am also going to guess that you have underdeveloped emotional circuitry as a result of emotional neglect as a child.

This is all related to ADD/ADHD. The area of your brain (pre-frontal cortex and orbitofrontal cortex) that deals with emotional regulation is heavily underdeveloped.

How do I know all of this shit? Because I've spent a decent amount of time trying to understand my own characteristics and it sounds quite similar to yours.

To confirm these theories, I highly recommend that you read or listen to the audiobook version(s) of these books:

  • Scattered by Gabor Mate
  • Driven to Distraction by Edward Hallowell
  • Running on Empty by Jonice Webb

    ..Especially Running on Empty by Jonice Webb.

    Here's why: Unlike physical or sexual abuse, it is extremely difficult and subtle to know if you've been emotionally neglected as a child. The reason is that the former is an event that happened (i.e: my dad spanked me) and the latter is an event that didn't happen.

    Since you have no reference or experience of what emotional assurance feels like, you don't know if you've been neglected emotionally as a child AFTER you are an adult.

    Rather, the symptoms show up as being distracted, ADD, depression, alienation, loneliness etc..

    Take this test and if any of the above books confirm my theories, look into the work of Alice Miller and listen to everything she says.

    With that said, DON'T GIVE INTO THE UNREALISTIC PRESSURE OF WANTING TO BE AN ENTREPRENEUR.

    Because, in the grand scheme of things, it's not a big deal. Not only that, when you read /r/Entrepreneur and see a 23-year-old making half a million dollars from a business he started 6-months ago, you are going to feel even shittier if you are so attached to being an entrepreneur.

    Remember:

  • Frank Llloyd wright didn't make Falling Water until he was 68

  • Colonel Sanders (who wasn't even a real colonel) didn't start KFC until he was 62

  • Sidney Frank didn't start Grey Goose Vodka until he was 77

  • Ray Kroc didn't even get the ball rolling with McDonalds till he was 60


    On and on....

    Take care of your mental health first.

    And remember, ADD or being distracted is NOT a disorder, it's a phenotype. (or as I like to call it: Multifocus) -- What you need to do is figure out how to use your tendencies to your benefit and design your life around it.


    We have sensationalized the idea of being an Entrepreneur so much so that, all we hear about are successes (i.e: Survivorship bias).

    What no one talks about is the psychological toll and the number of suicides that happen as a result of the unrealistic (self-imposed) pressure of wanting to succeed as an Entrepreneur. For example, Austen Heinz was running an incredibly successful startup and abruptly killed himself.

    Your happiness and sense of self should be 100% derived from within.

    The moment you start basing that on external factors, you are likely going to go down the wrong road.

    RELAX.

    You got plenty of time.

    This ain't a sprint.
u/KidsInTheSandbox · 5 pointsr/ADHD

There's a possibility you might not convince her at all since she's made up her mind already. That's usually the issue with old school mentality that do not want to keep an open mind and no matter how much proof you bring to their attention they will not budge.

I highly recommend buying Driven to Distraction by Dr. Hallowell and try to have her read some of it. If you haven't read it I also recommend you read it too since he covers a lot about parents convinced that the person is just lazy.

u/Corydharma · 4 pointsr/needadvice

Oh man do I get you. I've been there/am there and there's great news for you. There's so much you need to hear that will help. I don't have a ton of time and a lot of this you will learn on your own with time so I'm just gonna run though the highlights.

1)You think you need to be somebody else. You're not that person, stop living up to expectations that don't define your reality. Be who you are, not who you think you are. Your thoughts and judgments about who you ought to be are real but they are not reality. In other words. focus on what is and not what you think it should be. That's a recipe for constant struggle throughout your life. I'm 33 and still struggle like you with many of the same issues. It's a good sign that you've caught it this early. Be patient with yourself. Don't love the person you want to be. Love who you are. Be a good friend to yourself and accept that you're not perfect.

Watch this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RYlCVwxoL_g

2)Your parents love you. But you don't love them in the same way. It never will be. You can't comprehend the lives they lived before you came along and what it meant to them for you to be in their lives. It's an unequal relationship. It's a pay it forward system. You can appreciate them and show them how much it means to you, but you won't really understand until you have children. One day you will pass that kindness and guidance on to someone else, and they won't return it to you either at least until they are old enough to understand (which tends to be far into adulthood). Be grateful for them, but realize that you are not them. You are not what they want you to be, or even what you want you to be. You are you. Be you. Warts and all.

3)You are procrastinating because you realize subconsciously that you don't have the attention span or the desire to open that can of worms and sort it all out at that moment so you push it till later. It's normal, and lots of people do it because its easier to see the path than to walk the path. You see the route you need to take but you aren't doing anything about it because you are mistaking your intelligence for understanding. Always choose the harder path. Your ability to suffer through the things that you want to do despite them being difficult or uncomfortable will be the single greatest skill you ever learn. Hard work always beat talent when talent doesn't work hard. You are smart enough to see this problem, that most people never even notice. But you haven't learned self discipline yet. It takes years of study and practice. Sometimes it takes lifetimes. Settle in for the long haul. It's a marathon, not a sprint. Be patient with yourself. The only way out, is through. And the only way to make progress is one step at a time.

Read these The Most Important Question of your Life. https://markmanson.net/question

Procrastination https://waitbutwhy.com/2013/10/why-procrastinators-procrastinate.html

How to beat procrastination https://waitbutwhy.com/2013/11/how-to-beat-procrastination.html

4)You need to be honest with yourself. You don't know anything about yourself. Like seriously. You know NOTHING compared to what you are going to learn in the next 20 years. How could you? You've only just started being self aware a few years ago. You are just starting your path and that is the most wonderful place to be because you get to make mistakes and learn. You try to fail you learn. The difference between the master and the novice is that the master has failed more times than the novice has ever tried. You write as though you've been failing for years. Stop kidding yourself. You don't yet realize how far you are going to go on your journey. All that failure is learning. Be happy for failure. It teaches you WAY more than success ever will. All that failure is so good for you, but you push it away because it feels uncomfortable, because you don't LIKE it. What I'm saying here is you need perspective. You should realign how your looking at this problem. You are on the path little brother. You're already doing what you need to do, relax. Give it lots of time and fill your life with wondrous experiences and you will start to see that this problem you are having is just part of the journey. It's necessary. Learn to love the struggle. Learn to love the fight and not the victory. Your perspective will color your whole mindset about the problem. You seem so worried about fixing the problem, about being better, about acting how you think you SHOULD, but all of that is focusing on the FUTURE! None of that is going to help you get there, focus on what you are doing now and you will be able to get there. Just looking at your destination on the map doesn't help you get there. Take a step. Then another. Repeat. Keep your focus on the step you are taking. Chip away at it. You'll get there.

5) You should seriously consider going to therapy. It's super helpful. They aren't there to fix you. They are there to help you fix you. To be a mirror for you to bounce ideas off of and their job is to reflect what you are doing and saying and show it back to you so you can SEE yourself from the outside (a little bit). They aren't your friend or your parent. They are impartial. They don't care. And that lets them tell you the truth about you. It's seriously one of the best steps you can take for this kind of problem. But remember, they can't do it for you. You have to do the work. Going to therapy doesn't help if you don't take it seriously. It's an active step towards helping yourself.

6) Consider for a moment, that you might be wrong a bit about your depression. You might not be far into it but this struggle is really common for people with depression. In fact it's even more common in people with ADHD, which often leads to depression. Fuck what everyone on the internet and tv says about it. Read for yourself and decide for yourself if the dots line up. I was 27 before I realized I had ADD. It's crazy how you can go your whole life looking through life with tinted glassed and not realize you were wearing them the whole time. Depression is like that too. You don't even realize you've got it until you do some reading. Learning about it will help you deal with it, prevent it, manage it.

Watch this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LO1mTELoj6o

Read the book Driven to Distraction by Edward M. Hallowell M.D. and John J. Ratey M.D..
https://www.amazon.com/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152

It's the book that blew the doors open about the subject in the 90's and showed how prolific is really is. Both authors are doctors who have ADHD. This book changed my life. I had no idea how much I needed it. Even if you don't have ADD this book will help you understand tons of behaviors like procrastination and many of the feelings you described. It's cheap you can get a used copy for like 4 bucks. You may not think it's for you, but in my opinion, I see many of the same feelings and thoughts in your post that I had before I knew what my struggle was.



Final thoughts. You are alive. Enjoy it. Don't let this shit get to you. It's not important. You're only real responsibility in this world is to exist. You don't have to understand it. In the long run everybody's gonna die and eventually the whole planet will be swallowed by the sun. There isn't a great purpose or task of life. The purpose of life is to live. Like dancing. You don't pick a spot on the floor and say you're going to end up there. You just do it. You do it just to do it. Just wiggling because it feels good. Reveling in the fact that your alive. Celebrating for the shear joy of movement, vibrancy and life. There is no purpose. You are free. You are already holding the jewel in your hand. All you have to do is realize it. It's a choice. Happiness is a choice. Love is a choice. Love yourself. Be happy.

Peace


Edit:: If I took all this time to write this to you, then you should take the time to read the readings and videos I sent. Decide right now. I'm going to do these things. Do it now. If you can't do it now, then right now take out your calendar and schedule a time to examine these resources. That's the last thing I forgot to tell you. SCHEDULE YOUR LIFE!!!! IT HELPS SO MUCH! TIME MANAGEMENT IS SUPER IMPORTANT!!!

Time Management from a person with terminal cancer : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oTugjssqOT0

u/Sarihn · 4 pointsr/Showerthoughts

The book that I'm reading is Driven to Distraction, one of the authors (Hallowell) also has a podcast about ADHD.

The book was recommended to me by my therapist, from there I found the podcast on my own.

I hope it helps. :)

u/Lily_May · 4 pointsr/TrollXChromosomes

I was diagnosed at 5 and thought I grew out of it.

I did not. Instead I was just barely coping. Always in trouble at work, always half-finished projects, all my bills paid late, moving every 6 months. Getting help has changed me from being someone who is chronically late to someone that's 5 minutes early.

To all my ladies with ADHD. YOU ARE NOT A FUCKUP OR A FAILURE.

What's changed my world is understanding how my brain and body work and creating sustainable routines in my life. The way I think is different and I have learned to work with myself instead of against it.

You may needs meds, or counseling, or a combination. But you are not a shitty person. Help is out there.

Recommended reading:

Driven to Distraction:
Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder


Link to Amazon:

https://www.amazon.com/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152

u/neonflamingoxx · 3 pointsr/adhd_anxiety

Sounds like me a few years ago! Not sure what country you’re in because it means different access levels. My GP in Canada sent me to a specialized adhd clinic for rigorous testing which cost me a cool $1000. My bf managed to find a psychiatrist who was covered by the provincial drug plan and cost nothing. So you could ask your GP for a referral to a psychiatrist, conversely you could try asking for a referral to a psychiatrist at a walk in clinic.

This will be a tough road and honestly it’s going to come with a lot of judgement because you’re still “school aged” and even when you’re not, because the medication is a controlled substance you’ll get judgy reactions from pharmacists, insurance companies etc etc because they’re jerks and they just think we’re trying to get high on a medications we rely on to get through the day. Obvs not all are like that. I’m only saying this so you can be prepared to stand your ground and remember it’s ok that you’re seeking treatment to better yourself.

So until you are able to secure a diagnosis (keep pushing because it’s so important for your success if you do have adhd!) there are a few resources that really helped me you can check out:

I always want to be where I’m not: https://www.amazon.ca/Always-Want-Where-Not-Successful-ebook/dp/B00K1LGMJG

Fast minds: how to thrive if you have adhd or think you might: https://www.amazon.ca/Fast-Minds-Thrive-Think-Might/dp/0425274063

Driven to distraction: https://www.amazon.ca/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152

I hope you find a bit of peace in a few of these things, and remember that you know yourself the best, keep pushing until you find someone that will listen to you.

u/CoffeeAddict64 · 3 pointsr/ADHD

I'm posting a link to a great book about ADD if anyone is interested. It provides a lot of comfort and help when it comes to dealing with Attention Deficit Disorder. Driven to Distraction

u/throwaway_Rijriuv7 · 3 pointsr/ADHD

Honestly, it's going to get easier, and then it's going to get harder. Expect to take a few months (at least) to figure out the appropriate meds and the right dosage for you, to learn what the meds can fix and what they can't, and to learn how to deal with side effects like insomnia and irritability. Then you'll need to come up with strategies for stuff the meds won't touch, because as half the people on this sub will tell you, Adderall can just as easily be used to keep you focused on homework as it can be to spend seven hours sorting everything in your living room by color. It helps. It helps so much. But it's not magic and you have to point it in the right direction.

If you've got any kind of student health coverage, you might have access to a therapist who has ADHD-specific experience who can help you explore coping mechanisms like planners, calendars, checklists, etc. and sort real tasks from small distractions. (In my experience, therapists who don't have ADHD experience aren't much use. If I had a nickel for every one who told me to study harder, I'd have at least 15¢.) If not, read the books Taking Charge of Adult ADHD and Driven to Distraction.

Source: I was diagnosed halfway through college, and even with medication, it took me an extra two years to get my undergrad degree. (The meds also fucked with my sleep something fierce.) My undergrad capstone project came out all right, but I ignored all my other coursework and scraped by with a 2.3 in-major GPA. Years later, I'm working in industry and have put together a suite of checklists and calendars to get me through the day-to-day, but long-term planning and prioritization are still rough.

u/tim404 · 3 pointsr/ADD

As the one with ADD in my relationship, I highly recommend you get a copy of Driven To Distraction. It has a chapter specifically dedicated to relationships, and it's for both the one "afflicted" and the one "inflicted" if you get my meaning. ;) I don't know if it's worth owning, so check it out from your library if you can. It has a lot of insight to the kinds of questions you're asking and it says things a lot better than I ever could.

u/kinyons · 3 pointsr/ADHD

Girl, I am in exactly the same position as you. Actually created an account just to comment on this b/c it really struck a chord with me. I did get to a psychiatrist to officially diagnose me -- but couldn't afford to keep seeing him every 3 months to renew the prescription, so I am now medicine-free again :/

Here are some things that I've been working with over the past year:

  1. Fish oil pills. My DR told me to start taking these ASAP when he diagnosed me. His advice was to find a pill with an Omega-3 balance of 700 mg EPA/300 mg DHA, and take two doses of that a day (so 2000 mg/day). Clinical studies show a big relief in ADHD symptoms after about 3 months if you maintain this; big relief in mood/anxiety (if that's a problem for you) after 2 weeks. I am inconsistent with this but feel a big relief when I take them regularly. Dr. warned me that there is significant variation in how effective these pills are, so it's important to get high-quality pills and check the labels for dosage information, or you won't see a benefit. Store 'em in the freezer if they give you fishy burps.

  2. Exercise. Hard but SO helpful. Clinical studies show amazing benefits; benefits keep increasing the more you exercise, up to 1 hour of vigorous exercise/day. (Sorry no citation, this was also told to me by my DR.) I became SO much happier when following the couch to 5k program.

  3. Coffee. Adderall for cheapos. I drink more than is healthy, but it helps me focus when I feel myself "drifting" and I personally think that's worth the health trade off. Your mileage may vary.

  4. Sleep. 9 hours a night and I am a motherfucking HERO. That's hard to get but it truly, truly makes an impact for me personally. I try to turn off all screens/electronics an hour before bed, take a melatonin 30 min before turning off the lights, and turn off lights at least 8 hours before I need to get up, earlier when I can.

  5. Self-educate. Off the top of my head, the book that's helped me the most is this one, almost certainly available fo' free at your local library. Check everyone on ADHD out of the library, who knows? Something might click for you.

    That is the sum total of my current low-cost ADHD self-care system! If I am consistently implementing all those things, and engaging supportive and helpful friends as coaches, I feel really good about my life. I am still a space cadet, but the important shit gets done and more importantly, I don't hate myself so much. Er, too real? No we're cool. Keeping on keeping on.

    Good luck!
u/common_king · 3 pointsr/IWantToLearn

As someone who was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age and dealt with it from kindergarten through college, I'll be the first to say that medication is, at best, a "band-aid." There are practical solutions and strategies one can implement to help live with ADHD that don't involve medicine. Depending on severity, this can take years of practice, but it's ultimately worth it.

First, of course, you need to make sure you're diagnosed correctly by a doctor who specializes in working with patients who have ADD or ADHD. ADD/ADHD can be confused with all sorts of different disorders (e.g. auditory processing disorder, etc.) If you're looking for a book, I'd recommend Dr. Edward M. Hallowell's Driven to Distraction. Personally, I worked through some of his books (among others) while seeing a psychotherapist who specializes in ADD/ADHD. Take your time finding a good one or get a recommendation from a friend if possible.

u/PhDgirl10 · 3 pointsr/Calgary

You typically get a referral to a psychiatrist from a family doctor. However, a lot of family docs will write prescriptions for the non-addictive meds. I have had a long-standing prescription to one of the more addictive/potential for abuse ADHD medications, so I have to get mine from a psychiatrist.

I highly recommend the book "Driven to Distraction"
http://www.amazon.ca/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152

u/chiralcortex · 2 pointsr/ADHD

Driven to Distraction was recommended to me and I'm cracking it open this week.

The best way to manage ADHD is to develop strategies to overcome your weaknesses. For example, I forget where I'm parked in the car park every day. So I developed a location system and log it in my phone so I'll remember at the end of the day. I'm horrible with doing chores.. so the first thing I do when I get home is chores for 15 minutes.. or sometimes I go until I get bored. I suck at paying bills on time.. so I developed a spreadsheet that I check every morning that has the monthly bill amounts, date due and balances owed. I've turned tracking bills into a game.

It all depends on where your weaknesses lie as it is different with everyone.

u/stinkyhat · 2 pointsr/GradSchool

Just tagging on as a fellow ADHD-head: one of the best techniques that I've found for studying (avec medication, natch) has been to build in breaks. It sounds obvious and simple, but the way our brains are wired, we have seriously diminishing returns over long stretches. So, every 30-45-60 minutes (whatever works for you), get up and go do something that uses a different part of your brain. If you're reading and doing critical analysis, go for a walk, get a cup of coffee, watch 20 minutes of tv or something. When you come back, you'll be fresher and sharper to continue the work.

Also, the book Driven to Distraction has some excellent ADHD study techniques like this... particularly helpful because the self-driven nature of grad school means we really need to be our own supervisors.

u/jackie_o · 2 pointsr/raisedbynarcissists

It's good that you are aware of it! I wouldn't have called myself a worrier until I learned about hidden anxiety as an adult. I first learned about it in relation to ADD in Driven to Distraction as one of the possible symptoms from their suggested criteria for adult ADD:

"Tendency to worry needlessly, endlessly; tendency to scan the horizon looking for something to worry about, alternating with inattention to or disregard for actual dangers. Worry becomes what attention turns into when it isn't focused on some task." (92)

This is especially true in those who have ADD with anxiety or OCD who use worry as something to organize around. I personally find waking up to be very disorganizing, so I'm trying to be more meditative in bed as opposed to ruminative. Sometimes worrying just makes me want to go back to sleep to escape the chaos, but I'm learning to talk to myself kindly and start the day slow. Instead of chugging coffee and jumping into a daunting task like clearing my email inbox, I try to eat something, read, go for a walk, or meditate.

When it comes to support, they suggest that you shouldn't have to worry alone. Recently I've attended a self-help group and am planning to attend a group for women with ADD as well. I hope you are able to find support where you live!

u/Osborncs · 2 pointsr/ADHD

The book Driven to Distraction helped me a lot. Here's the link:
http://www.amazon.com/Driven-Distraction-Recognizing-Attention-Disorder/dp/0307743152

Now you're either thinking fuck books, I wouldn't finish or you are reading 12 already like me. Just start the book. You aren't alone and ADHD sucks a lot, but you can learn our "gifts" that normal people can't do as well as we can. Back to the book... I started to hyperfocus during the first chapter of this book. It is one of my faves.

u/zenthursdays · 2 pointsr/videos

My doctor recommended a book, and after reading it everything clicked. You should give it a go: https://www.amazon.com/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152

u/bombeater · 2 pointsr/infp

I got diagnosed with ADHD when I was 23 and began treatment within six months. It changed my life; six years later and I am a confident expert and leader in my field, with a level of self-esteem and joy that I never thought achievable before.

If nothing else, do yourself a favor and read Driven to Distraction!

u/TheJester73 · 2 pointsr/waterloo

i was diagnosed late in life, your doctor could refer you to a psycho therapist, however there is still a stigma around adult treatments, and unless its changed, the best i was offered was group therapy and i hated it. ive done very well on my own without treatment, but that is just me. everyone is different. i also suggest picking up the book driven to distraction. https://www.amazon.ca/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152

just make sure you are being treated for the right reasons, adhd in adults leads to other issues such as depression, that doctors treat without treating the root cause, so make sure you communicate well with them.

u/y0y · 2 pointsr/ADHD

Read the book Driven to Distraction.

It's a very easy read and not very long - almost as if the author knew his intended audience.

It really helped me understand what adhd actually is, and it helped me fully understand the role of medication in treatment.

u/scootdog · 2 pointsr/ADHD

So, you recently graduated and you are pushing Java to production? And you are worried you are not doing well enough? Seriously — I suspect you are doing great (Most of society of all ages has no clue to how to perform your job).
Look into cognitive behavioral therapy. It can help with negative thought patterns. Also — this book: https://www.amazon.com/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152/

u/drLagrangian · 2 pointsr/ADHD

I literally read this passage this morning

>An important, and often overlooked part of both learning disabilities and ADD is the social consequence of having them. ADD can interfere with one's interpersonal life just as dramatically as it does with one's academic or job performance. To make friends, you have to be able to pay attention. To get along in a group, you have to be able to follow what is being said in the group. Social cues are often subtle: the narrowing of eyes, the raising of eyebrows, a slight change in tone of voice, a tilting of the head. Often the person with ADD doesn't pick up on these cues. This can lead to real social gaffes or a general sense of being out of it. Particularly in childhood, where social transactions happen so rapidly and the transgressor of norms is dealt with so pitilessly, a lapse in social awareness due to the distractibility or impulsivity of ADD can preclude acceptance by a group or deny understanding from a friend.^1

You're in high school right? high school is a difficult time to be introverted, because everyone demands you live your life a certain way and act a certain way, and anything else makes you an outcast. Get through it. It is difficult, but life isn't like high school. In the real world you won't be interacting only with people within 2 years of your age. you won't be interacting only with people who want to go do things or judge people all the time. There are lots of types of people out there and high school is not a good slice of them. Get through high school, and head to the rest of your life.

It took me a while to realize that being an introvert is fine. Mostly because my fiance is one too. We sat down one day and both said "It's annoying that everyone wants to do things with us, why can't we just be alone with ourselves?". we are both introverts, and we enjoy it this way. Other people may not understand it, but we have fun, we enjoy life, and we have friends. we just don't need to jump every time someone mentions a movie or thing. We just don't need people the way other people do. It is hard to accept, but we came to understand it and are happy with it. It is hard for other people to accept, but we don't really care about that anymore. WE are happy, and that's all that matters.


^1 Driven to Distraction by Edward M. Hallowell, MD and John J Ratey MD^2: i'm only a chapter in and its a great book. find it and read it.^3

^2 The authors are psychologists and also live with ADD (at least one does, I haven't gotten very far). But they are considered the defining accessible sources on living with ADD.

^3 If you can't focus on a book like this very well, get Answers to Distraction this one is made in a FAQ format in smaller pieces.

u/throwaway126886 · 2 pointsr/ADHD

My dad got this for me when I was diagnosed (he read it I didnt because im lazy but will get around to it some day). I just flipped through the whole book and it only talks about ADD and not ADHD. Good luck with your son and don't be frustrated.

u/raella69 · 2 pointsr/ADHD

No it's fine, I wouldn't have responded if I wasn't ready for questions. It is extremely schedule-oriented, almost annoyingly so. And it might not be that way for everyone. I had to write down journals for weeks about what I did and when I did it and how often/long. That was tricky to stay on top of. I just had to grit my teeth so to speak and make a point to sit down and do it in a context where I wouldn't get anything else to distract me. I had to switch from digital journals to physical ones so I wouldn't end up wandering the internet for hours instead... If I had to guess this is where most people would find the most difficulty. But what we learned is that I am a creature of habit. Routine. My day has to start with me eating and then showering and getting dressed, and doing it out of order or oversleeping and being unable to do so because I might be running late for work really throws me off. I am trying to add physical exercise to the end of my morning routine but it is difficult in my current living situation. I have actually regressed significantly in my own opinion as my roommates are very... unorganized and constantly wish to wrap me into their impromptu plans and aren't really interested in my reasons as to why that doesn't work for me. It has gotten to the point where I am disrupting that neat and needed schedule to avoid them being able to further disrupt me. However, I am going to be living on my own soon and will be able to dictate my own schedule as needed and be the master of my domain. Or at least that is what I am wish to achieve for myself.

And I don't necessarily have to eat the same thing every day or anything like that, but the breakfast and meals need to be similar in the time the take to prepare at the time I elect best to do so. When I was at my peak progress a few months ago my hardest issue was keeping to a consistant sleep schedule and waking up around the same time as I sometimes just can't sleep. But I am actually quite proud of myself as only some nights I have trouble with that as opposed to most nights. I am hoping once I am set up at the new location I can try to allot some time for... meditating, something I have never been capable of. I hope to use the skill of 'clearing my mind' (whatever that means) to facilitate falling asleep more quickly. Sometimes I stay awake for hours because I am not done thing about whatever happens to enter my thoughts- so nothing in particular so much as the gears just don't wind down when I want them to.

But my biggest growth I have made is not giving myself the 3rd Degree if I slip up or something happens. I have always been worried about being lax with myself that I found I might be more critical of myself that what would be considered healthy.

I had go try a few therapists before I found one that worked for me and was interested in my desire to try a non-medicated approach. If you want to try it I have to say that the journals were honestly the hardest part, but once I could view my own habits as data, I made a lot more sense to myself. But for now it is a serious WIP. And know that life happens and you might find yourself in a situation where it is hard to impossible to provide yourself with the environment you need. But do not give up. Persistence is the name of the game.

Kinda ranted a bit but for once I am actually quite tired and I think I will be able to put my head on my pillow and get right to it. I will be happy to answer more questions.

And lastly, consider this book. It is a great tool for understating yourself and relating to others like yourself, without connecting to the internet and risking extreme distraction. But also make time for goofing around because that is healthy too.

u/mbrace256 · 1 pointr/stepparents

I was diagnosed with ADHD in 3rd grade and never received treatment until I was 19. I took medicine off and on, been in therapy for 7 years and finally had a full psych eval done almost a year ago.

If appropriate, suggest a full evaluation to your spouse. Sometimes it's covered by insurance, other times (in US) the school district may pay for it, if he has trouble in school.

Once you get an evaluation, there are many different directions listed here. There are some doctors (and parents) who will go straight to medicine and others who use it as a last resort. Personally, I enjoy both medicine and therapy now that I'm older, but wish I had CBT when I was younger. I do often forget to take my medications...

Favorite ADHD Book: Driven to Distraction

u/phenomenomnom · 1 pointr/ADHD

I was in exactly your situation. Driven to Distraction and You mean, I'm not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy? both helped me.

Sleep a lot. Remove as much sugar as you can from your diet. Drink ALL the water. Have some loving support. Good luck.

u/kajsfjzkk · 1 pointr/ADHD

There is good advice here as long as the ADHD partner is willing to acknowledge their shortcomings and take actions to reconcile the pain they will unintentionally cause their non-ADHD partner. In particular, making sure that any counselor or doctor has a specialty in ADHD.

Only OP is in a position to judge, so I'll add that if the ADHD partner is not committed to improving, the solution is not for her to be even more accommodating. That just sets up more of a parent-child, nagger-nagged dynamic. He has to be willing and able to learn to live like an adult despite the challenges of ADHD.

Some additional links:

ADHD and relationships:
http://www.drhallowell.com/overview-of-how-adhd-affects-relationships/

Driven to Distraction gives a pretty clear explanation of what ADHD is and is not; has a section on ADHD and relationships; and distinguishes ADHD from comorbid conditions.
https://www.amazon.com/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152

u/Dokterclaw · 1 pointr/ADHD

It sounds like you're American, so things might be different than in Canada, but I'm fairly certain that Concerta has gone generic recently. According to my doctor, the generic's extended release doesn't function quite as well for whatever reason, but it's probably gonna be a looooot cheaper.
This book is also a really good read. Written by two doctors who have ADHD themselves.

u/ngolshan · 1 pointr/ADHD

this. the single biggest help I had in understanding my own ADHD when i was diagnosed. http://www.amazon.com/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152/

the book was given to me by my (very excellent) psychiatrist for that exact purpose, and is very well respected.

u/ichbinsilky · 1 pointr/ADHD

Both you and your wife need to read this book. There are coping tools for you, and tips for her dealing with you. It will also help her understand why you are the way you are... why she has to keep reminding you to take out the trash every Thursday etc.

It might also help shed some light for her, if she might need to be tested for ADHD as well.

u/cwginac · 1 pointr/ADHD

First, in my opinion (from an ADD guy, so probably biased), it's not anything wrong with you. I definitely do things like that, and medicine helps a lot.

Even if it's just you, and it's a lack of willpower or whatever bull people say about it, if medication helps you focus, then it really doesn't matter. If it helps, it helps.

My psychiatrist gave me a survey to fill out, and did some tests that required concentration. I failed every one, but it probably would be hard to fail them in the right way if you weren't ADHD.

I read this a while back, and it gives really good information on what ADHD is, and what it isn't.
http://www.amazon.com/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152#

Let us know what you end up doing. I'd start with that book and making an appt to see your psychiatrist.

u/HyperKiwi · 1 pointr/CompTIA

That's a great book but you need to read Driven to Distraction.

If you do have ADD it's going to be like reading your life. If that's true then you need to see a Psychiatrists that practices in ADD.

They can find a drug that will work for you. They do work too. Even if you don't think they do. Try it for a month and then ask your family, co-workers, and friends if they noticed a difference in you. They will all say yes.

u/mikeeg85 · 1 pointr/Teachers

Hey- teacher, medicated for ADHD and parent here. I've taught upper elementary for 8 years with my current assignment in 4th grade. I've had countless discussions with parents in your same situation. They are very reluctant to medicate their children with the fear of turning them into a zombie or significant loss of weight due to certain stimulants. Some have proceeded with the medication route, some have gone 504 plan, therapy treatment or nutritional changes route. The most drastic (for the better 90% of the time) have been the medication route. I have seen complete 180* turns in students.

​

In my profession experience, it is often evident when a student has extensive potential that is being restricted by something such as ADD or ADHD. They seem lazy, disorganized, disheveled, lost in thought, restless and constantly in motion; but when I sit with them one-on-one and hold a conversation, their thought progressions, interests and demeanor reveal tons. It just feels like there is so much more than what I see in a classroom of noise and chaos.

​

Personally, I had a similar experience to another poster. My parents admitted to me when I was in my mid-20's that they always knew I had ADHD but the diagnosis wasn't "in" in the early 90's. My school work was mediocre, writing was a terrible time for me. I had difficulty with reading comprehension, the words just had no meaning when my brain couldn't dial in long enough to put significance to the sentences and paragraphs. Socially, I had friends but I would legitimately be told that I couldn't go to birthday parties because I was too hyper. That being said, I got through undergrad and a masters' program without ever studying. Papers were always completed last minute and projects typically had glue drying as I turned them in. I sought out treatment in my early 30's and have been on medication in conjunction with therapy for almost a year. The difference has been incredible. Lesson planning for the week used to take me 4-5 hours (I teach math so really I'm planning 5 lessons for a week), where as the medication has helped me to the point of completing the same task in an hour. My students from previous years have even made comments about how much more organized and "together" my classroom has become. My professional evaluations have even been boosted because of my improved planning and implementation.

​

As a father of a 2.5 year old, I am very aware and attentive to what I have ahead of me. My son exhibits the same exact behaviors I did growing up. My parents remark on a weekly basis that he is a carbon copy of each me- which scares my wife. She recoils at the idea of putting him on medication. His last daycare made comments about his inability to stay seated for lunch, sit still during circle time, or be able to lay down for a nap without being rocked (they're two year olds mind you- and his class was mostly girls). He is now at a new daycare with kids just as rowdy and energetic as him that he loves attending. He gets rave reviews for how inquisitive he is and how much personality that shines through.

​

I've reassured my wife that medication does not have to adversely affect his life if we choose to go down that road. There is new research coming out monthly on therapies and strategies to help kids experiencing difficulties with focus or attention. The big two- Adderall and Ritalin have been around for decades, and aren't always the best route. There are anti-depressants and non-stimulant medications used to effectively treat ADHD. Yes, amphetamines do have a risk of dependence, I've worried that I'll fall into this, but I've been fine so far. It is not societal or educational norms that you should be focused on, but how does your son feel about his own academic performance and overall life standing. By 5th grade, he is probably aware of his tendencies and behaviors. I would start by having a candid discussion if you haven't already, asking him if he believes this is a problem. Get his input, medication wouldn't only affect his education but his general functioning. The book "Driven to Distraction" was recommended to me by my therapist and put a lot of perspective into the decision to take medication.

​

https://www.amazon.com/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152/ref=asc_df_0307743152/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=312750113425&hvpos=1o1&hvnetw=g&hvrand=14839575934987710473&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9007210&hvtargid=pla-331017318230&psc=1

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If you do not experience ADHD or difficulties with attention it can be tough to understand the fog that others have described. The first days of having medication were really frustrating, I felt as though I had wasted years of my life just coasting without really utilizing my potential and I was initially resentful of my parents. Sitting here today, I've moved past the resentment and decided to put my focus on helping and supporting my students who have their own struggles. Whatever you decide, just continue to be in constant communication with you son's teachers and support them as much as you can.

u/fefebee · 1 pointr/ADHD

I definitely had ADD when I went, I've had it my entire life, but because I lack the 'hyperactive' part, no one would believe me when I said I thought I had it. After reading a bunch of books on the topic, every little thing kept clicking - from my over active imagination, teachers comments on 'she's smart, she just doesn't apply herself,' my dabbling in drug in college...everything! I remember asking my mom in my sophomore year of high school to take me to get tested for ADD but she didn't think I needed to, I just 'needed to study.' I can't help but wonder these days had she listened and took me to the psychologist back then how much differently my life would've been and my career.

To determine if I had ADD, basically I went to the doctor and explained why I thought I had it, and she then recommended a therapist to talk to which I did for about 3 months before I was actually prescribed Vyvanse, and it was another 2 months before we got the dosage right. They made me take some little tests, but mostly it was reading books and telling them what I learned about myself.

I highly recommend you check out "Driven to Distraction" by Halowell - it was the book my therapist told me to check out and after I read it I think I had highlighed like, every line of the book. It was a great determining factor in getting the help I actually needed.

Like I said before, part of getting help is helping yourself and not letting your ADD rule you - which, trust me, I understand is much easier said than done. I have worse days than others where my ADD is almost unmanageable, but I don't let it define who I am or the quality of the work. I just understand it is something about myself that I don't necessarily have control over, and may never have control over, but as long as I accept that, I think I have found a little bit of happiness from it.

u/dfjdejulio · 1 pointr/ADHD

It's my favorite book on ADHD, written by a pair of doctors who themselves both have ADHD and specialize in the treatment of it, one of whom benefits from medication and one of whom does not.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/0307743152/

EDIT: One person to whom I recommended it informed me that it's also available in audiobook form, in case that's of interest. And I suspect it would help your husband understand you better. If you do get him to read it, I'd be interested in knowing if I'm right about that.

u/danieljohnsonjr · 1 pointr/ADHD

I was diagnosed at age 32 myself. At first, I felt a combination of emotions. First, there was relief that there was a name for what I'd been dealing with. This was then followed by feeling like I was somehow defective. Another guy at church recommended a book to me, and I want to recommend it to you. Attention Deficit Disorder: A Different Perception by Thom Hartmann!. It helped me see that I'm not defective but wired differently.

Another great book that I browsed was Driven to Distraction by Ed Hallowell!.

For me, meds just help turn down the static and are part of a wholistic approach to taking care of myself. I have noticed, as you shared, that I seem to get more done when I not only remember to take my meds but also am getting enough sleep, eating the right kinds of foods, and getting exercise.

Welcome to the world of Hunters! :)

u/Zarbec · 1 pointr/AskReddit

Um, in all seriousness, that actually sounds like it could be ADD. We get comments from teachers like that a lot. Do some research, this book is the classic. You very well might be just bored and lazy, but if you do have ADD, you will save yourself a lot of trouble by finding out and learning about it early.

If I could go back to my 15 year old self, I would say "You have ADD. It's not your fault." Would have changed everything.

u/psychodynamic1 · 1 pointr/needadvice

The ADD could be a reality for you ... and one interesting thing to note is how caffeine effects you. Do you find yourself having more focus and concentration? Then a psycho-stimulant may be for you. Check out the book Driven to Distraction by Edward Hallowell. It could help you understand ADD a bit better. Also, you don't need to know your career path now. Keep being curious and try things. Do an internship in a field you might be interested in ... and then decide if it feels right. All the suggestions on this thread about talking to a guidance counselor or social worker is great advice. Take it. Don't be alone in this.

u/roland00 · 1 pointr/ADHD

The distraction series by Dr. Edward M. Hallowell M.D. The first one is driven by distraction. I am going to list the amazon links and the order they were written in.

Driven to Distraction (Revised): Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder

Answers to Distraction

Delivered from Distraction: Getting the Most out of Life with Attention Deficit Disorder

I highly recommend those books

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I even more recommend listening to Dr Russel Barkley on youtube. He is a doctor who has been studying ADHD for over 30 years now, and he is a gifted public speaker and explainer of ADHD. You can watch the videos on your computer or media device. You will find more than a dozen of these videos on youtube, some a couple mins some 3 hours long. The essential idea for parents is the best one, it deals with 30 different parts about adhd such as what causes it and how best to treat it, and all the science behind it. It is not just for parents but anybody that wants to learn about adhd...Linky

Now I use a website called clipconvert cc Without using any software you can give this website a link and it will give you an option to download a youtube video as a video, or a music file of many various file types. All the work is done on their computers and servers. They do have software you can download that does the same thing, but please do not bother with this. Note if you do not read the directions they will automatically download (but not open) the software that allows you to do this on your computer, there's a checkbox you uncheck to make them do it on their computers. [b]They also do have a lot of pop ups on their website, close them and do not click on them.[/b] I do not know how safe the pop ups are but the website itself is safe.


Thus you can have a mp3 to listen to while driving, on the bus, exercising, cleaning up the house, etc.

u/sooneday · 0 pointsr/NoStupidQuestions

First, diagnosises can be wrong. It's also possible you have ADHD. People with ADHD often associate with other ADHD people simply because they find regular people boring. Second, ADHD is a misleading name for the condition. There isn't a deficit of attention. It's more of an inconsistency of focus combined with weaker self control than it is the inability to focus.

I recommend reading a book on ADHD. http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0307743152?cache=9e63ced07072ae963391cba2d4468b08&pi=AC_SX110_SY165_QL70&qid=1405869392&sr=8-4#ref=mp_s_a_1_4