Reddit reviews Exploring BDSM: A Workbook for Couples (or More!) Discovering Kink
We found 3 Reddit comments about Exploring BDSM: A Workbook for Couples (or More!) Discovering Kink. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.
It sounds like a BDSM checklist might help you both figure things out. Here's one you can download from scribd.
https://www.scribd.com/document/163631556/BDSM-Checklist
Morgan Thorne put together an excellent workbook for couples called 'Exploring BDSM'. It's full of great information, detailed checklists and how-to guides, and all sorts of other good stuff. Highly recommend i.
https://www.amazon.com/Exploring-BDSM-Workbook-Couples-Discovering/dp/0995878048/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1542243469&sr=8-1
Take care,
Mark, male half of the hkc
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You guys should really start educating yourselves more before immediately jumping into it. Otherwise, your experience is going to be terrible if you don't.
>I'm also kind of struggling with the idea of it as my previous and first serious relationship was physically abusive and controlling and I cant wrap my head around why someone wants that?
BDSM isn't abuse or abusive in any way. It should always be completely consensual and non-manipulative, which is what separates it from abuse. A healthy BDSM exchange has no qualities of an abusive relationship at all. In BDSM, both parties can communicate and have a say. Communication is really key in BDSM in order for it to function properly. If you have poor communication skills in your relationship, you need to work on that first if you think about jumping into kink. See here.
You both need to communicate more, have more discussions, be completely open about not knowing and learning together. Both parties should be reading and gathering information together. Even if you ever decide to be the "Dom", make sure you're not the only one educating yourself.
With that said, I recommend reading beginner BDSM books. Here's one I suggest, but definitely feel free to hunt for others: "Exploring BDSM: A Workbook For Couples by Morgan Thorne"
Watching educational videos (not porn). Evie Lupine is a great channel for beginners, just look around her channel for beginners content: Her YouTube Channel.
You can also poke around these subs:
r/gentlefemdom
r/femdomcommunity
r/rolereversal
If you find out you're submissive, or even just plain vanilla, don't feel like you have to force yourself into an act for your partner. Doing this will only lead to frustration and disappointment in the relationship. If your partner needs for his partner to be dominant, and it's not in you to provide that (and vice versa, if he can't be dominant for you if you needed it), then you'll have to evaluate the relationship from there.
Exploring BDSM: A Workbook for Couples Discovering Kink by Morgan Thorne
This is a really great book, especially if you have a curious partner and want to introduce them. It's not just reading, but it's also a workbook, so you both can participate. This is a lot more digestible for new people.