Reddit reviews Game Of Thrones 2016 Red Blend, Paso Robles, 750mL Red Wine

How do you do, fellow entrepreneurs?

If you've been looking to have a sleek, professional, and sexy website created for your business, or if you're interested in trading in your old, boring website for a more interesting, engaging website that actually attracts attention, then I'm your guy^[1]. Also, if you're looking for digital marketing or copywriting help then I'm also your guy.

"Sure," you scoff, "you're some random guy on the internet. How can I trust you?" You know why you can trust me? Because I have:

• Bomb-ass client references who I've worked with previously and can tell you I know what I'm doing
  
• Landing pages that actually fucking work
  
• A Jewish heritage. You know what the stereotypes about Jewish people and business? It's all true^[2] . I will make sure you get delivered results, because you damn well deserve it
  
• Brass balls. It takes gonads of steel to do the web-design I do. It especially takes massive huevos to do the digital marketing that I do. I will work my ass off until I get you the results you want for your company. Tim Ferris and his 4-hour workweek can suck my dick. I'm working an 80-hour workweek to make sure you get some actual results instead of blowing smoke up your ass
  
• I eat/drink Soylent EVERY. GODDAMN. DAY. I sleep only 3 hours evenly distributed throughout the day^[3] You know why? Because I wanna spend less time doing unimportant things like eating and sleeping and spend more time doing things like implementing a sick^[4] landing page and marketing plan.
  
  HERE: www.excelladesign.com is a portfolio showing some of the work I've done in the past, including other websites I've worked with such as this one: www.betterbrains.io, this one: www.getcasely.com, and even this one too! www.timothymarc.com
  
  I can also help with SEO, social media management, email/newsletter marketing and creating sales funnels for your company.
  
  If you're interested, go ahead and PM me or leave a comment below for any of my services, or if you have any questions^[5]
  Please note that pricing is on a per-quote basis, and depends on what your exact needs are. This will be determined in a followup call or after a detailed discussion.
  
  ____
  FOOTNOTES
  
  [1] Replace "website" with "wife" and you've also just described what I did with my latest divorce and second marriage
  
  [2] Ok, the Jewish part might not necessarily help but it doesn't hurt either. Also, if my mother knew I was using my Jewish heritage to promote my business she'd probably kill me. Oy Vey.
  
  [3] Seriously though, don't actually try this. I tried it for a week and almost killed myself.
  
  [4] When I use the word sick, I mean the colloquial definition of the word "sick" meaning "awesome" or "amazeballs" and not the actual definition meaning "feeling like it's plausible you could die at any given moment"
  
  [5] If you're wondering, I was (and still am) slightly drunk while creating this post. I did this deliberately to allow my creative juices to start flowing. If you're looking for an alcohol recommendation, I recommend the Game of Thrones 2015 red blend. Perfect for getting drunk at dinner, bachelor parties, or weddings.