Reddit Reddit reviews How To Win Friends and Influence People

We found 50 Reddit comments about How To Win Friends and Influence People. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.

Interpersonal Relations
Healthy Relationships
How To Win Friends and Influence People
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50 Reddit comments about How To Win Friends and Influence People:

u/lucidlogik · 17 pointsr/LifeProTips
u/Z4KJ0N3S · 15 pointsr/DecidingToBeBetter

Read How to Win Friends and Influence People. Really, pick it up. It's a book I make sure to read cover-to-cover every 6 months.

u/RisuMiso · 5 pointsr/technology

This book is about $20 on kindle:

The same book is about $8 in paper format:

Simon and schuster are a despicable publisher who conspired with apple to price fix and raise ebook prices. They can suck on a bag.

u/HappyMexican · 4 pointsr/asktrp

Complicated answer that depends on context.

I would go read "How to win friends and influence people"

But heres also a quick step by step guide

  1. First you must really ask yourself if you want more friends and to be more social. If you can say "I want to have more active social life" then proceed.

  2. Read some material like the one I posted.

  3. Location/Place/Time matters a lot here though. If you are in college/High School, join some clubs and try to talk to people in general. Asking/remembering their name is actually a big plus here. If you are unemployed living with you parents and are older then 20+ you have bigger issues you need to address and look into those first. If you are an adult with your own apartment, this can be the hardest place to make friends. I still would recommend looking around your city for clubs, meetups, events or even someone from work.

  4. Remember two things. People love to talk about themselves, and finding things in common with people is the quickest way to get to know them. Start the conversation with simple questions, in til you get them to tell you a story. Just smile and listen to their story, then comment positively on the story. Keep searching for thing you can relate to and bring it up when they stumble across one in their talking. Rinse and repeat.
u/sethra007 · 4 pointsr/childfree

> I am so guilty of trying to plan ahead what I'm going to say!

That was a big piece for me. I was so focused on coming up with a response that would make someone like me that I wasn't truly listening and then reacting honestly to what they were saying.

A good book that helps with understanding classic back-and-forth of conversation is the classic "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie (link goes to Kindle edition). Some of the examples are a little dated (he refers to people who were celebrities at the time he wrote his book in the 1930s), but the advice is rock-solid useful.

And while I haven't done this, a friend of mine with social anxiety joined her local Toastmasters chapter a few years back so she could to learn to cope with public speaking. She swears it changed her life. Certainly all of her friends noticed the change--more confidence and easy-going with strangers. You might consider it.

u/RishFush · 4 pointsr/seduction

Yessir, that's a good way of putting it.

>May I ask how you worked on your social skills and networking?

Absolutely! First I read a bunch of books and articles, which I'll list for you below. Second I got a job that requires a lot of social interaction. And third I made a very dedicated effort to do more social things.

(Wow, I didn't realize how large this list was going to be. So I'm going to very highly recommend the first three books and just say that everything else is going to be beneficial, but not really necessary. You don't have to go nearly as deep as I did to get good results.)

How to Win Friends and Influence People
How to Talk to Anyone
What EveryBODY is Saying

Never Eat Alone
The Gentle Art of Verbal Self Defense
Argumentation and Debate
What to Say When You're Dying on the Platform
The Quick and Easy Way to Effective Speaking
The Art of Framing
This article
This documentary on body language
This video on body language
This ebook
This website
This video
This video
This video
A lot of Craig Ferguson interviews (especially the lady ones)

u/theycallmewildfire · 3 pointsr/marchingband

Hey friend.

Maybe over the summer, hit some books over leadership. Band really is a great place to learn and apply leadership skills.

Some books I recommend:

Extreme Ownership by Jocko Willink

How To Win Friends And Influence People by Dale Carnegie

I can't recommend Extreme Ownership enough, though. If you take extreme ownership of your section they'll respect you a million times more than they already do. When they respect you that much more, they're that much more likely to not put you in bad positions anymore.


I've gotta add that it'd be good to listen to some podcasts and videos by leaders, too. Since I'm already talking about Jocko Willink, he has a TED talk, too. Here's a link.

u/INTPClara · 3 pointsr/INTP

Practice, practice, practice. It's going to be so much easier to do now than it will later.

If you want to read, this book and this book are useful. Forget the stupid titles. They're handbooks of social skills written for people like us.

This book is also helpful, it's based on the MBTI, and although it's business-related you can apply it to any social interaction.

u/7FigureMarketer · 3 pointsr/Entrepreneur

You should be more specific about what you're hoping to learn. There are thousands of resources out there in regards to entrepreneurship, marketing, website development & eCommerce. You could find pretty much anything you want if you phrase it correctly.

Example Searches

  • How to setup Facebook ads
  • How to start a business under $1,000
  • Growth hacking (tips and tricks on growing your business fast)
  • How to build a wordpress website + top wordpress plugins
  • How to create a landing page
  • Best community bulletin board software
  • How to build a Facebook group
  • How to create YouTube videos


    You can just keep going from there.

    The basics of what you'll need, assuming you know nothing (which I doubt) would be this.

  • How to build a website (wordpress, html, Wix, Squarespace, .etc)
  • How to build an audience (paid + organic, FB + Google + Instagram + Pinterest + YouTube + Reddit)

    Everything else you just figure out along the way based on how you want to monetize your audience and quite honestly, no book is going to help you figure that out.

    You'll learn a lot more just hanging out on Reddit and watching YouTube videos on the subject matter that's next on your checklist. Books are almost purely inspirational at this point and I think we can agree there are plenty of Podcasts that will help you find inspiration (and skill), such as The Top (Nathan Latka) or Mixergy

    If you study hustlers you'll get all the information and inspiration you could ever hope for. Read or watch anything from Noah Kagan (AppSumo). No one does it better than him. Ryan Holiday (not an affiliate link) is another favorite of mine. There are also some older Tim Ferriss articles that really talk about how you approach certain businesses.

    Like I said, man. It's all out there. You don't need to pay $1 for information, you just have to know what to look for and if you listen to a few podcasts or read a few beginner articles you'll figure out pretty quickly the steps you need to take next.


    Some Books I Like (no affiliate links)

  • The Obstacle Is The Way: Ryan Holiday
  • Extraordinary Popular Delusions And The Madness of Crowds: Charles Mackay
  • Secrets Of A Master Closer: Mike Kaplan
  • Hooked: Nir Eyal
  • The Art Of Learning: Josh Waitzken
  • The 4 Hour Workweek: Tim Ferriss (Maybe the best entrepreneur book of all time)
  • Pitch Anything: Oren Klaff
  • The Gambler: William C. Rempel
  • and of course...How To Win Friends & Influence People: Dale Carnegie (everyone MUST read this book)
u/lotuswebdeveloper · 3 pointsr/worldnews

talk to people. Listen to them. Hear why they think the way they do -- hear what they want. Then persuade them that what you want is what they want also.

I'm currently about 10% of the way through and it has exercises you can do to get better at being heard (it requires lots of listening)

Another great source of useful techniques is

The big thing to remember is there are no short fixes, and nothing is easy (edit:nothing that's worth while atleast). It's easy to get angry and frustrated -- it's more effective to listen, be thoughtful, and win friends

u/CongregationVJackals · 3 pointsr/suggestmeabook

The very old/boring recommendation---but many people still swear by it: Can probably get it for FREE/ $0.00 at your local library. Good luck friend!!!

u/mushpuppy · 3 pointsr/infp

Just be cool. Whoever this girl--or anyone you ever know--wants to introduce to you, just say hi and talk to them. A great book for you to read maybe is How to Win Friends and Influence People. Contains very basic info/suggestions about how to treat people like they matter. It's no great mystery. Just takes practice. And comfort with yourself.

As an ESTP, man, you gotta practice that E. Kinda funny you'd be asking introverts about how to be an extrovert. :)

u/recursivefaults · 2 pointsr/gamedev
u/GenConsensus · 2 pointsr/dating

Read these books:

No More Mr. Nice Guy
Daring Greatly
How to Win Friends and Influence People

While you do that, just make small talk to people. Not necessarily to people you're attracted to. You can keep it short, "nice bike", "nice dress", "do you have the time?", "do you know the way to x?", "know any good coffeeshop around here?"
Look people in the eye, don't break eye contact first, genuine smile.

You'll see that people are generally good. There'll always be assholes, you don't need them.

u/Dennerman1 · 2 pointsr/AskSocialScience

Two great books on this very topic, but the short answer is you have the best chance to change someone's mind when they see you as someone "on their side" or in their group/tribe. If they perceive you as someone from the "opposition" then they will get defensive and no amount of convincing, facts, or persuasion is likely to have an impact on their point of view.

The Righteous Mind by Jonathan Haidt

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

u/PM_ME_BOOBPIX · 2 pointsr/needadvice

This is a classic:

Not perfect, but it's a good start.

u/rocknrollchuck · 2 pointsr/RPChristians

I like u/BobbyMckee's answer. I would also add that rather than address any perceived aggression directly, why not just strike up a conversation and get to know these two guys a bit?

This would also help you hone your social skills - if they are not a threat, you will have gained some insight into yourself and your perceptions. If they are a threat, then you will know, and you will be able to trust your gut more. It seems to me that you may be rushing to judgment over what you perceive to be a threat. Of course, you could also be correct.

Have you read How to Win Friends and Influence People? You can read a short summary here to give you an idea of what it's about, but you should read the whole book (with Christian discernment, of course). I think it will help you.

u/calrobertlee_design · 2 pointsr/socialskills

Yup! They are super simple and useful. If you are interested in that book, I would definitely check out this book.

So far, it is my favorite book on social etiquette!

u/CSharpSauce · 2 pointsr/Entrepreneur

Learn to talk, and how to see their perspective (this is a must read for everyone who is in any way a professional):

Recently I started also reading some books from McKinsey. Super great stuff. What I love about them is they really emphasise how to structure your thoughts, separate yourself from ideas, and to do what's best for the project.

Finally, some of your trouble might be that they're questioning your "strategy". They might be right!

EDIT: one more actually, and this is NOT a must read, but for some of us... it can be. Some of us need to learn how to get over ourselves:

u/henriettatweeter · 1 pointr/offmychest

Dating is a skill, just like any other.

Suggested reading:
The Dummies books are actually very, very good. Dating for Dummies
A classic:

There is also a Relationships for Dummies, but I would start with dating.

u/mythriz · 1 pointr/socialskills

I was looking into a book about social skills years ago and ended up getting "How To Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie, because it seemed to be more "good-natured" and less manipulative compared to some other books (not sure if it's entirely true, just seemed that way when I was looking it up).

I'm not sure if that is what you are looking for though, it sounds like you want a book that "forcefully whips yourself into shape socially"!

In any case I never finished that book anyways because I got to a chapter where it said something like "you should care about the person you are talking to", and I realized that I in most cases don't really do even that, and got kind of discouraged. Strange thing is that I tried quickly looking through the book now, and I can't even find or remember what passage it was that I read. Should probably try reading the book again...

Edit: The link in the sidebar, "Improve Your Social Skills", looks interesting too.

u/EpimetheusIncarnate · 1 pointr/Random_Acts_Of_Amazon

This book has some interesting principles that I used unconsciously. It taught me to be more aware of what I was doing in certain situations. I've never had problems manipulating people(that sounds bad, doesn't it? I promise I only use my powers for good!), but this book improved my ability to recognize when I am actively applying a principle detailed within. So yea, you could say It changed my life.

I've been pretty eager to read this book, it's been on my WL for a while now :)

u/mn_aspie · 1 pointr/aspergers

Not a video but the book Persuasion, The Psychology of Persuasion is a great read to understand how these non-verbal cues persuade people to act.

There's also the classic How To Win Friends and Influence People which discusses human nature and how to get on people's "good side."

u/Melcher · 1 pointr/LifeProTips

Step 1) Buy this book. Dale Carnegie's "How to win Friends and Influence People"

Step 2) Read this book

Step 3) put this book into practice

Step 4) Repeat steps 2-4 as often as needed

When I read the book and took the class there are a couple things i took from it.

  1. the first rule. Don't Criticize, Condemn, or complain. Nothing turns people off to you as much as doing those.
  2. Be a good listener. Another example of the 80/20 rule. Listen 80% / Talk 20%. Not only listen but actually pay attention. Put your phone down and have a conversation. Don't interrupt people when they are talking.
  3. Make the conversation about them. Ask people about their interests. Talk about what they like, not about what you like.

    Making friends is tough. You need to get the other person to be interested in you and that doesn't happen right away.

    And 1 more thing...

    NEVER EVER EVER EVER be a story topper. Everybody knows what I'm talking about. It's one of the very first things I will notice about a person and I can't stand people that are story toppers.
u/orendevil · 1 pointr/faimprovement

Be warned, this will be very long, however i wanted to share my experiences up to this point and some ideas on what you could do. I hope this does help you, and anyone else whom is reading.

Definitely join clubs. you may want to look into Student Government since it's a great way to meat people and get involved with your school. Also, if you have a Student Center, hang out there often. If you're commuting, make sure you get to school probably an hour or two early. Also, perhaps a Cafe would be a good idea as well. One issue that I have is that there isn't a whole lot of recreational clubs in College, or Community college for that matter. Find something that can pertain to your field. Aside from College, when i'm usually at Comic Con's, I will see advertisements for a few groups that meet up occasionally. You may also want to try the whole Speed dating thing I mentioned earlier that is usually held at Comic Con... just be warned there will be a few interesting characters however.

You may also want to check in with any Mom and pop cafe's if you have any near you. They may host events. There's one down the street from where I live that does a Chess night which i'm interested in. You're also going to need to set goals. My goal for now is to try to get a girlfriend before my 20th Birthday, and that's only 6 months away, but it will hopefully motivate myself to work very very hard. People say that the moment you "stop caring" or "stop trying" is the moment you find a girlfriend. Even though I have no experience with women beyond asking them out and being rejected unfortunately, you do have to try. What's helped me is to think of dating as if you would look for a job. You can't put all your eggs in one basket. You can't focus on only one employer to hire you, as much as you can't focus on only one girl to go out with you. Dating is very much so a numbers game. Luck does seem to play a part.

I've gone from shaking like crazy at the thought of talking to a girl, I always rationalized myself out of approaching women. I trained myself to be a bit more "brave" I guess you could call it. At first i just started complimenting girls weather it be customers at my job, peers, anyone, and at first i was extremely nervous with that whole idea. I even tried rationalizing not to even tell a girl that I like her eyes, or her hair, or her clothes, but eventually I got myself to a point where I don't feel excruciatingly nervous when talking to a girl. I still feel awkward at times when I give out a compliment, but I usually leave with some feelings of satisfaction. Another thing I really started doing is cold approaching. Now instead of just complimenting someone, I tried to strike up a conversation.

Now it didn't go too bad, but it didn't end great but I feel as though it did prepare me for other things in some level. Over the last year and a half, or even perhaps the last 4 years, I've asked out over 30 girls. None of which were interested in me, many of which rejected me on the spot, others which led me on and used me quite a lot. One thing you should be aware of is that, you're not going to leave this unscathed. You're going to have some baggage accumulated over the years, and you're going to be fighting a lot to not feel burnt out, to not become bitter, to not become resentful. It's going to be hard work trying to stay positive, especially when it's a lot easier to give the world the middle finger and sit in front of your computer, but I hope for your sake, and mine that we'll get out of this hell of which we call Forever alone and I fucking hope this will be all worth it.

EDIT: You may also want to look at these resources as they have helped me to a degree:


No More MR Nice guy

How to win friends and influence people


Shakedown Lab

Nick Notas


Stephan Erdman; Dating Coach

Simple Pickup

u/Zepp_BR · 1 pointr/socialskills

A lot of people talk about Dale Carnegie's "How to win friends and influence people". I still need to give it a try.

Edit: amazon link

u/thrizzlepizzle · 1 pointr/selfimprovement

Just to give some more context, let me list out what I've tried so far:

u/telecomando2 · 1 pointr/sysadmin

Read this:

Or essentially these ideas.

Be a nice person
People always want to talk about themselves - ask them leading questions and let them talk.

u/Raltie · 1 pointr/socialskills

Hey man, I did a video for you, i hope you can take a minute to watch it!

Here's the book I talked about in the video.

u/Chocolate_Bomb · 1 pointr/Civcraft
u/nutshelladvice · 1 pointr/Advice

Read this book. There's a reason it's been a bestseller since the 1930s. So much solid advice on how to be likeable and persuasive.

u/Charliekratos · 1 pointr/politics

Dear Mr. Trump,
[Here you go.] (
You're welcome.
Those of us who remember being a great country.

u/sm-ash- · 1 pointr/cscareerquestions

There are a few books that may help, How To Win Friends and Influence People, How to Talk to Anyone, People Styles at Work

Other than that, you might try some relaxing apps or apps that deal with social anxiety.

u/OFFICIAL_GIRAFFE · 1 pointr/teenagers

Yup. Read How to Win Friends and Influence People if you haven't already, changed my perspective on people, and I can actually say I have an easier time talking to girls after reading it.

u/dfmtr · 1 pointr/audiobooks

Even better: Go to the Whispersync-enabled Kindle version on Amazon ($11.99), and under the "Buy Now" button, check the box "Add Audible narration for $12.99" so you get both for $24.98 as a non-subscriber.

It's so astoundingly stupid, if you're a monthly subscriber there's no way to add the e-book when you buy the audio with a credit. And if you do buy the e-book and try to add the audio as above, it pays for the audio part ($12.99 above, but often as low as $2-3 for other books) with your $14.95 credit (edit: unless you check a box to not use the credit). Mind-boggling.

u/EinarrPorketill · 1 pointr/Psychonaut

How To Win Friends and Influence People

If human connection is what you want more than anything, what is stopping you? Perhaps psychedelics can help you find some answers to that.

u/jfoobar · 0 pointsr/tennis

Actually, /u/blee3k didn't call Gilbert an idiot, I did, and it was a mostly tongue-in-cheek reference to his horrible television commentating, not his book (which I have not personally read)

However, since you are so quick to take offense and resort to childish name calling, might I suggest another book for you?

u/[deleted] · 0 pointsr/Python

I have no specific idea, but am very interested in the answer. The best I can suggest is to read books like How to Win Friends and Influence People and Difficult Conversations. But I don't really know how to specifically change people's minds on that.

u/ThePoolPlayer2016 · -5 pointsr/running

Iknow you are trying to be funny but It's a typo not a misspelling. I should recommend a book on social skills. You are certainly not funny. And for the joke to hit it should be true shouldn't it?