Reddit reviews Joy on Demand: The Art of Discovering the Happiness Within

Since you're asking this in r/meditation, I'm assuming that you are looking for self-love which is meditation-oriented but more specific than just a generalized meditation subreddit. r/metta fits the bill. Metta is loving compassion for everybody, including yourself. It's surprisingly small, but also surprisingly active by its moderators and also has some links.

If you're just looking for any loving kindness not necessarily on reddit, I got inspired by this interview to put this book in my reading list. What's special about Tan and some other metta directions custom made for westerners is their special treatment of self-love, since that is something that a lot of people have problem with.

Otherwise, since love is such a central part of buddhism and most other meditation oriented religions, I would say that r/meditation and r/buddhism, r/yoga and other general meditation subreddits are good, too.

In Joy on Demand, Chade-Meng Tan talks about a metta practice in which you shoot metta lasers at everybody you meet or see (pew pew), while feeling the metta or stating the intention. When I've done this practice, eventually the pew pew becomes sufficient. It's a great practice in traffic. If somebody does something particularly annoying, and you feel aversion arising, you can practice trying to direct a full set of metta intentions toward the person, and see if you can.

> Often though I feel somewhat confused if I should try to "correct" or cultivate more wholesome thinking at these moments or to just observe the activities of the mind not identifying with them.

I haven't played around with this as much, as I tend to simply vipassana the thoughts in awareness and leave them at that, but I know that the Buddha had more elaborate prescriptions for dealing with unwholesome thoughts that arise. For example, for lustful thoughts, you can tune into the disgusting nature of these human bodies, with our skin and bone and puss and puke and poop, and that might mitigate some of the impact. I don't recall all the prescriptions. Generally, I too try not to buy into them, either leaving them where they are or greeting them with metta. Might be worth doing some searches on the issue if it's an obstacle in your practice: Found this helpful thread on /r/Buddhism for example.

The best way would be to get in person instruction from a qualified teacher. For mindfulness specifically there are mindfulness based stress reduction (MBSR) courses all over the world. There might also be some traditional meditation centers in your area. Look them up and try the ones that interest you. They're usually filled with nice helpful people.

You can also try watching meditation Youtube videos or meditation apps like headspace. Reading books can also be useful especially with the right book. There's a few good books on the side bar. Reading mindfulness books for anxiety is how I got started with meditation and they helped me a lot. Based on your last sentence about enjoying moments, I'll suggest this one I read recently called Joy on Demand. It's an easy to read book filled with a bunch of techniques for being more present and cultivating more joy in life.

> Could this possibly be from meditating? I guess it’s not too important but I’m curious.

Maybe, maybe not.

But what harm could come from thinking so, when you
>took a long walk during my lunch break today and it felt amazing to feel the wind and hear the birds and work my body

and associated it with a new promising habit? Could you cultivate this joy and continue attending to it, even when practice is less rewarding or difficult?

A worthy book on joy (and only $2 on Kindle): https://www.amazon.com/Joy-Demand-Discovering-Happiness-Within/dp/0062378856

It's definitely important to taste and know what regular practice can yield, how the way you relate to thought and experience changes over time. Just don't let it get in the way of enjoying practice due to attachment to outcomes.

Glad the diet was helpful and that your situation seems to be improving. Thanks for posting!

I am using HighIQPro.com. I actually was with them several iterations ago starting in 2015. I recently started with the Gated Duel N-Back which throws curveballs at you continually, which to me is a better simulation of the distractive chaos of real life than standard Duel N-Back. Your progress is tracked. While they guarantee an increase in your IQ, and have you take certified IQ tests at different intervals, what matters to me is that I'm able to transfer the training to my work and life in general.

Give that there are older studies that question whether IQ can be improved, I prefer to think of working memory as have the characteristic of muscles. You can practice and make it stronger. No memory tricks or systems such as "Memory Palace." All the research on neuroplasticity backs that up. So we don't have to have a debate about whether N-Back increases IQ. I would say that meditation fits into this category. Read Joy on Demand: The Art of Discovering the Happiness Within. That's another avenue for optimizing what you have.