There is no way in hell you should get me this Sweeney Todd Soundtrack. If you do, I may listen to it enough times to not only learn the words but actually learn how to make meat pies with bloodletting assistance from my local barber. I would be forced by this new knowledge to open my own meat pie shop and begin making delicious treats from local community members. This will go on for nearly a decade before, on his deathbed, the barber gives up the gig to clear his conscience. Running from the law, I am forced to move to a remote area in Montana where I meet a nice young gentleman with the nickname of "unibomber" and we begin to have a hot and torrid affair. After a few months I realize he is too strange, even for me, and I head off into Canada where I am apprehended by a squadron of mounties. I am shipped off to Guantanamo with a life sentence, only to find that the staff there wants to put my culinary skills to use in disposing of their "oops, I over waterboarded that one" bodies. The pies are a hit in Cuba and Fidel Castro (robotic version - back from the dead) decides to arrange for my escape (not knowing the pie contents of course) to become his personal chef. I live out the rest of my days cooking for him using freshly slaughtered cows - with him always complaining the they just don't measure up to the pies I had made previously.
So, please....for the love of god do not get me that soundtrack.
There is no way in hell you should get me this Sweeney Todd Soundtrack. If you do, I may listen to it enough times to not only learn the words but actually learn how to make meat pies with bloodletting assistance from my local barber. I would be forced by this new knowledge to open my own meat pie shop and begin making delicious treats from local community members. This will go on for nearly a decade before, on his deathbed, the barber gives up the gig to clear his conscience. Running from the law, I am forced to move to a remote area in Montana where I meet a nice young gentleman with the nickname of "unibomber" and we begin to have a hot and torrid affair. After a few months I realize he is too strange, even for me, and I head off into Canada where I am apprehended by a squadron of mounties. I am shipped off to Guantanamo with a life sentence, only to find that the staff there wants to put my culinary skills to use in disposing of their "oops, I over waterboarded that one" bodies. The pies are a hit in Cuba and Fidel Castro (robotic version - back from the dead) decides to arrange for my escape (not knowing the pie contents of course) to become his personal chef. I live out the rest of my days cooking for him using freshly slaughtered cows - with him always complaining the they just don't measure up to the pies I had made previously.
So, please....for the love of god do not get me that soundtrack.
Sweeney Todd music