Reddit reviews The Authenticity of Faith: The Varieties and Illusions of Religious Experience

You might be interested in Richard Beck's book The Authenticity of Faith. He examines Freud's claim that religious thinking is a consoling illusion that we seek for relief from subconscious or existential angst (which the feel-good versions of Christianity you describe seem to confirm).

In response to Freud, Beck argues for the theories of one of Freud's contemporaries, William James, who divided religious believers into two categories: "healthy-minded souls" who use their beliefs as a Band-Aid to minimize evil and existential angst as Freud predicted, and "sick souls" who do not use their faith in such a way and face pain/evil head-on. After her death, it was discovered from her notes that Mother Teresa fell into this latter category for much of her ministry; clearly it is possible to be a "true Christian" as well as a "sick soul".

Beck's thesis was Freud was only correct about some believers, but there are others who don't fit his mold. You sound like one of them, one of the "sick souls" that James observed, and honestly I think that's a good thing. Jesus never taught the kind of oversimplistic therapeutic moral deism that passes for much of Christianity today, and you seem to have seen through it and developed a thirst for something more. Don't stop searching!

If you're interested in Beck's book, I summarized it a bit more thoroughly on my blog.

Unclean by Richard Beck

The Language of God by Dr. Francis Collins

The Lost World of Genesis One by John H. Walton

Birth and Death: Bioethical Decision Making by Paul D. Simmons

The Authenticity of Faith by Richard Beck

Beyond The Firmament by Gordon J. Glover

All of these were required reads for me as I pursued a biology degree at a Christian university. I hope these help, and I wish you the best! If you have any questions about any of the books, please feel free to ask!!

Oh, and to the OP or anyone else interested interested in what's really going on here, I highly recommend picking up a copy of this book on moral psychology, or if that's too much checking out any of these other resources about politics and moral psychology first: The video in the top right is as good a place as any.

Learning about terror management theory or one of its analogs (René Girard's scapegoat model or TMT through this book if you are religious) is also highly recommended in learning about why the other side always seems to us to be full of assholes. This award winning documentary is a great introduction, streams for free, and is one of my favorite movies ever.

We all need to demonize the other less and work together more on our common goals more, including being able to listen to what the other side has to say.

The first step IMHO is to learn the psychology of what separates us and why. Unfortunately, as research in cognitive science has demonstrated time and time again:
> "Our mental limitations prevent us from accepting our mental limitations."

-Dr. Robert Burton