Reddit Reddit reviews You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder

We found 44 Reddit comments about You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.

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You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder
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44 Reddit comments about You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder:

u/rcinmd 路 61 pointsr/science

It annoys me that it took me almost 3/4 of a page of comments to come to someone that actually describes symptoms of ADHD rather than the "I am just not motivated and get bored easily" crowd. I'm an impulsive ADD and it sucks, but a lot of people wear ADHD as a badge or get out of jail free card either because they are "self-diagnosed" or given a diagnosis by a physician that just wants that sweet sweet procedural pay that comes along with the therapy. Adderall has also changed my life and I'm able to be in situations that every-day people don't have to cope with and I've become a better person because of the drug. I no longer snap at people just because they interrupted what I was doing and I don't (always) say things without thinking about the consequences. Sure the concentration and motivation were always an issue but there are a lot of other problems associated with ADHD that are so overlooked that most people just don't realize they are part of the problem.

BTW if you or anyone else is interested in a great book to learn about what ADHD really is, I highly suggest
You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder by Kate Kelly & Peggy Ramundo.

u/[deleted] 路 9 pointsr/AskReddit

A few recommendations for books.
ADD-Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life

You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy

What Does Everybody Else Know That I Don't?

It may be you have Adult ADHD. See a psychiatrist to get a medical diagnosis. Good luck

u/jaxxly 路 7 pointsr/ADHD

"You Mean I'm Not Crazy, Lazy, or Stupid?"
http://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487


This was recommended to me by two different therapists. It is written by two women. I'm female with ADHD so this definitely helped when I was diagnosed.

u/Redaxel 路 7 pointsr/ADHD

A lot of people have recommended You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!, but I haven't read it yet. I still have to finish Delivered from Distraction. In typical ADD fashion, I hyperfocused on it the first night I started reading; mind blown, felt like it would change my life; haven't picked it up since 馃槅

u/AndNowIKnowWhy 路 7 pointsr/ADHD

Hey dude, all the best. In all seriousness, reading up on the matter (via books and internet resources) changed my life completely and utterly and made a huge difference.

I picked what worked for me and especially untangled the emotional djungles that hover invisibly as the actual reason for procrastinating and cluttering one's life.

If I may suggest: I know it's controversial, but the first ice breaker I happened to encounter was "So you think I'm not lazy, stupid or crazy?" by Kate Kelly and Peggy Ramundo, I began with it and it completely changed my route.

And this article is an absolute must imho: waitbutwhy's "Why Procrastinators Procrastinate".

u/nickmortensen 路 6 pointsr/TickTockManitowoc

I taught the only class on ADHD ever offered by UW Madison. You don't sound as hopeless as many of the people that attended my course. You are even still young enough to turn it all around.

Here's where I'd start: https://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487

Possibly the dumbest shit ever is creating the definitive book on Adult ADHD and making it only available in print. It's like locking it away from the people that need it the most. As I understand it, they have an audiobook version now and you can get it if you sign up for a free trial of Audible.

Don't wait too long. Nothing more sad to me than when I would tell 75 year old men that I never met their entire life story. It's a Hell of a parlor trick, to be sure, but it does kill that whole "At least I am unique... I tell it like it is...People either love me or hate me..." thing we all try and hang our hats on when trying to explain why we are the way we are to ourselves.

u/SilverWings002 路 4 pointsr/adhdwomen

I might look that book up. I myself loved 鈥榊ou Mean I鈥檓 Not Stupid Lazy or Crazy?鈥

https://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487

Not ready for workbooks though. I could not follow through. But I could make therapy appts.

u/johnnyslick 路 4 pointsr/ADHD

I super duper recommend this book:

https://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487

It's got an audiobook version if you can't be arsed to read (and I don't mean that as a slam! I've "read" soooo many books on tape the past several years in part because I need the distraction of riding a bike or walking a long ways in order to be able to concentrate on something like this without my mind travelling in 570523 different directions).

u/thetvneverlies 路 3 pointsr/TwoXADHD

thank you for the suggesstion. after looking at that book, amazon recommended this one and the title alone made me cry.

u/Acute_Procrastinosis 路 2 pointsr/ADHD

I know that I read at least half of this one:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0743264487

You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder

I bought it on recommendation from an aspergerian acquaintance.

u/Stralor 路 2 pointsr/ADHD

I have ADHD-PI.
We all have different hormonal makeups, and sensitivities. I don't have too much of an issue with my meds and my hormonal cycle, (I'm on 3 month depo shot, and Strattera). But did experience extreme emotional swings when I tried Ritaline. Bassically as soon as it stopped working I would cry/get angry.

I was raised in a family where ADHD became a household term when 2 siblings and my mother were all diagnosed, when I was around 6 years old. I wasn't diagnosed till I was 25.
I'd always known about ADHD and how some people have bigger problems with certain symptoms and the personality disorders sometimes associated with ADHD. But it didn't hit home till my mother gave me the book, You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid Or Crazy?
http://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487
I really recommend it, as it gave so much insight into my symptoms, and which symptoms I had been overcompensating for.

Since I got diagnosed and had my therapy, courses and medication. I've been busy trying to get my non ADHD family to understand how ADHD works, why it is that way, and why berating people for things they do which are literally symptoms. Is a nasty way of putting those people down. Instead of accepting their flaws, and the entire package that person is. By comparing it other physical flaws like bad eyesight, or hearing. Why won't you just start hearing better! Does nothing for someone's hearing, and it's unrealistic to expect it to improve.

Both my siblings and my mother have been talked down on and in my sisters case completely black sheep labeled. Because of their ADHD symptoms, and inability to magically make their symptoms disappear.

As a side note for people who think they don't have the hyperactivity, remember that doesn't just include the classic boy running around and bouncing around.
Women are from childhood taught to be quiet, we internalize it, so the hyperactivity often shows in us in different ways, like speaking at a high speed. Or vibrating your foot, picking at something, fiddling with your hair, fidgeting. And also high speed thoughts.
When I am for example at school when I am very focused on something my foot will vibrate, or I will play with a pen in my hand, this release of hyper activeness allows me to focus.

u/jm_me 路 2 pointsr/ADHD

Don't take the "screw it!" route just yet. I don't recommend throwing in the towel and just accepting that you can't do it. Let's not go down that well trodden path just yet.

Meds aren't the only answer. There aren't magical pills that make homework easier. They can help a little but they aren't a cure all. You need to educate yourself on your condition. Read books and learn everything you can about this. You need to take a very active role in managing yourself and the only way you can do that is by knowing everything you can about ADHD. You aren't lazy or stupid. It's actually a decent book to start with "You Mean I'm not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy". You can't fight anything if you don't know what it is you are actually fighting against. You can do this if you have the right information. You can do it.

You have a condition that makes this stuff harder to deal with than it is for other people, but that doesn't mean you are stupid or lazy and it doesn't mean you can't find ways to deal with it. Stop telling yourself that and stop believing that as soon as possible. I was in a similar place as you. Thinking the same things and feeling like shit all the time. After I finally found out why I couldn't get my life together I started to devour as much information as I could and that is the only way I'm able to lead a proper functioning life now. It takes a lot of tools and tricks but I'm doing it and I have a lot more years of bad habits to break than you do. Take this chance to get on the right track now.

Good Luck.

u/redditingatwork31 路 2 pointsr/ADHD
u/fuzzykittenhead 路 2 pointsr/ADHD

This book really helped me understand add, forgive myself, and understand other people's attitudes towards me. I still read it when I need advice on cleaning, money, relationships etc. I like it because it's written in a style that is easy for an ADD person to read, and it's not vague.

u/flynnski 路 2 pointsr/ADHD

http://psymed.info/default.aspx?m=Test&id=64&l=3 <--- 6 question screening test.

take a few of teh screening tests. if you turn up likely for ADHD, chat with a therapist/psych. talk about behavioral screening and medication. see what mix of the two is right for you.

step 1 is talk to a dr.

if i could've been diagnosed at your age instead of 25 my life would've changed drastically for the better. i would've had a good gpa in high school instead of barely passing.

do some reading. do some research. make sure it's you.

this book helped me a lot: http://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487/

ask us lots of questions. we're here for ya. :)

u/techniclr 路 2 pointsr/ADHD
u/ColoradoNative456 路 2 pointsr/popularopinion

I'm having this issue with my daughter and I had to file a state complaint against the school.

I've been saying (since 4th grade last year) that my daughter may be dyslexic and I would like to have her tested. Her teacher thought that my daughter was lazy. This year (5th grade) I put my foot down and demanded testing. Then I filed a formal complaint for them ignoring my 3 requests last year.

My daughter is not stupid or lazy! She just learns in a different way. And luckily now she's getting the extra help she needs. But she fell behind last year and her self esteem suffered. I tell her every day that she is smart, and remind her of all the things she's good at.

***I highly suggest your read this book. You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder https://www.amazon.com/dp/0743264487/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_4BF2DbNZ2BX2H

u/Stessanie 路 2 pointsr/ADHD

Love that one! For those wanting to find it, the title's actually You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!

u/vengeance_pigeon 路 2 pointsr/ADHD

You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid, or Crazy?!

It's an old book, but it helped me out quite a bit when I was diagnosed as a teen (though it is adult-focused, not teen-focused). It addressed ADD in women specifically as well as adult ADD in general. Obviously the section about meds is going to be useless- but the biggest part was that it was so comforting to read. It truly made me feel, for the first time in my life, that I wasn't a lazy, useless slob. I read better books about the actual medicine/psychology, but this book helped me immensely on an emotional level.

u/nemineminy 路 2 pointsr/internetparents

I recommend this book. As someone who went undiagnosed as a child, discovering the world of ADD as an adult was mind blowing. The title of the book was basically my exact thought lol

u/lodc 路 2 pointsr/LifeProTips

http://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487/ref=zg_bs_598622_10

Made me feel less hopeless and even like certain aspects of it

u/Daheavyb 路 2 pointsr/ADHD

I'm in my 40s. I didn't self diagnose until my mid 30s, until then I was that guy that graduated high school with a .08 (not a typo), but got a full ride scholarship to a local college for my ACT scores. I knew the material, I simply couldn't do the work. (it took me 20 years to realize that word "couldn't" wasn't "wouldn't") I dropped out after 5 months.

If I had a friend or support like you back then, letting me know I'm not a failure by nature, I can only imagine how my life would be different now. Don't get me wrong, I've been lucky, I was able to forge a career as a consultant because of my hobbies (IT), but not everyone else has that opportunity.

Understanding is key. The book "I'm not Lazy, Crazy or Stupid" was my saving grace.

*EDIT: That book is not a recommendation, it's outdated for today's standard.

u/winglerw28 路 2 pointsr/ADHD

> Right now I am doing my best to dive into that flaw and try my best to understand why I feel that way.

It is a common type of thinking with ADD! We trick ourselves into tying self worth and productivity together. Growing up, many of us were told that we were lazy, stupid, or crazy! There is a great book on exactly this topic designed for those of us with ADD that I would highly recommend! It is easy to read, which I loved because I have a very hard time reading!

> I don't think my future self would be proud that I took the easy road. I don't want to die a failure.

My biggest regret in life in failing out of college. Not because I failed, but because I made it harder by not taking the easy way out. I could have passed, and am even successful in my career today aside from my career because I swore to never allow that failure to define me. There is nothing wrong with taking the easy path if it will improve you as a person and is more healthy for you in the long term. Sure, sometimes you will need to take the harder path, but don't force yourself past your limits.

> I wish it was different but it is what it is but I can't afford to be easy on myself.

You don't think you can, but there is a difference between being hard on yourself and being unfair to yourself! Mental health is important too, and if you're killing yourself and pushing yourself to the limit 24/7, you will burn out. You don't deserve that, and don't need to live that way, I promise!

> I wish I had supportive people like you and others on this sub in my life. Thank you for the kind words. I wish I knew a way to tell you how much that means to me.

You will find them in time! I once felt the same exact way, and often felt paralyzed with anxiety and fear over these types of thoughts. Things get better, but it takes baby steps! :)

I believe in you, and hope that you find the answers and help you are looking for in your life outside of this sub. You can do this, it just takes a little patience!

u/_StarChyld_ 路 2 pointsr/ADHD

my problem is that i read books like this in such an ADHD fashion..... I have some books on adhd that i have read several random chapters in different orders a few times..... I think the one i have jumped around in alot is You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder They actually talk about jumping around in the prefex for the book!!

Whatever the op decided to do, the first step is to try something. I am really good at not following through or finishing things, and i am finding that writing things down seems to put a different level of commitment to it vs putting it into evernote or a spreadsheet or whatever!

Though for work, I have a spreadsheet that i use to track things based on week that has conditional formatting for whether a task is in progress or completed. Whatever has not been completed from the previous week is copied over with notes and progress. that way i can see what projects and tasks i have to do at a quick glance.

u/raisinghellions 路 2 pointsr/ADHD

I was also diagnosed in my 30s. Around the same time, I found this book, and just the title made me burst into tears in the bookstore like a lunatic. Still haven't read it, but I plan to. Sending you love, OP.

u/UniverseBomb 路 2 pointsr/aspergers

I'm diagnosed, and have the same issue with meds as an adult. Cup of coffee is the best I can do for myself. Anything else, and goodbye sleep. Also, this book helped me a long time ago.

https://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487

Memory and self-control techniques are always worth learning, ADD or no.

u/phenomenomnom 路 1 pointr/ADHD

I was in exactly your situation. Driven to Distraction and You mean, I'm not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy? both helped me.

Sleep a lot. Remove as much sugar as you can from your diet. Drink ALL the water. Have some loving support. Good luck.

u/g0bananas 路 1 pointr/ADHD

Also, learning about yourself.

I suggest reading You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy +pdf or amazon

being aware is good. When you are feeling off, maybe write a list down of the things you're being distracted by. Or ask them to write what they want to talk about so you don't forget.

Google Keep is great for this because you can share notes and lists really easily with one another.

You just have to talk about it though. Good luck :D

u/Caviel 路 1 pointr/ADHD

I absolutely feel where you are coming from. Seek alternate opinions, or better yet ask your professional why they made the call. Ask trusted others if they notice a difference in you post medication. My type A wife absolutely can tell and often informs me without prompting if I missed a day of medication.

You are feeling the impact of opinions and influences from a world where many think ADHD isn't even a real thing. How many of these have you heard? Slow down. If you just work harder and focus more, everything would be fine. Can you sit still please? Buckle down and stop being lazy. If you just applied yourself more... Get your head out of the clouds and get this done. Just be patient.

To some extent it is true, if we focus more and work harder things will turn out better. What many don't comprehend is that what many would consider "normal" focus is often very difficult for us to achieve, double for things that don't interest us or requires more mental effort.

Think about it this way: If you answered the questions honestly, and probably conservatively like I did for fear of sounding like an addict, and you were still given an ADHD diagnosis...you have ADHD. If you take the prescribed meds and you don't turn into a spastic/hyper mess? Also a strong sign.

The next whammie you deal with? Comprehending how much easier life is on medication and the realization of lost past potential. I was in your exact shoes until I tried Vyvanse for the first time at 38 and it revealed how much coping I had been doing all my life.

A book recommendation for you:
https://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487

And an entertaining video from a website with a lot information that helped me:
http://totallyadd.com/our-unofficial-adhd-test-video/

u/hai-sea-ewe 路 1 pointr/GetMotivated

I know exactly why you're ranting, because we're taught by society that all our problems are all our fault.

Hence the book You mean I'm not Lazy, Stupid, or Crazy!?, even the title, was a complete revelation. I'd been spending so much time beating myself up for things I couldn't help without outside assistance.

Being able to have intentional coping techniques + the right doses of medication have transformed my life.

u/RedditBlueit 路 1 pointr/AskReddit

You might also ask about seeing a psychologist for testing. If you're diagnosed, a psychiatrist can prescribe, but a psychologist can help develop compensating strategies. I found this book pretty helpful.

u/Catman1033 路 1 pointr/ADHD

You should consider buying this Adult ADHD guide:http://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487

The authors mention this sort of tunnel vision stuff in the world of ADHD dating. I'm not gonna lie, this book doesn't give good advice per se, but the breadth and nuance of the ADHD related issues it covers is astounding. I think half the battle is just knowing that you are not alone.

u/ImaginaMagica 路 1 pointr/ADHD

24yo F with ADD here.

It could be that your issue stems from phone communication? When I was in my teens, pre-diagnosis, I had a long distance relationship that didn鈥檛 go well because I had a strong aversion to phone conversations. I couldn鈥檛 remain engaged with them but didn鈥檛 know how to express it.

In aself help book I read recently, I recall a section talking about this particular issue for people like us. Non-verbal communication cues aren鈥檛 there in phone conversation so it鈥檚 harder for us to connect/stay connected with what is going on.

I鈥檇 recommend doing more research on this for yourself to see if this matches what you鈥檙e feeling (and also because my memory can be less than perfect). If that turns out to be the problem, and the 鈥渓ong-distance鈥 part of your relationship is non-negotiable for both of you right now, maybe consider using webcam?

Hope that helps

u/lolusererror 路 1 pointr/ADHD

I鈥檓 almost 35, and have been considering getting a diagnosis for a couple years now. I know that almost every year of elementary and middle school my teachers encouraged my parents to get me evaluated, but my parents didn鈥檛 want me medicated so it never happened. My wife鈥檚 degree is in elementary education and she says it鈥檚 obvious from my family movies, and my current issues, that I probably have ADHD or am high functioning ASD.

I constantly wonder if there is a medicinal treatment that would help me, but haven鈥檛 gotten around to seeing a doctor.

All that to say. I can totally see where you are coming from. If you saw a doctor as an adult, and they diagnosed you with ADHD then go with it. If you鈥檙e feeling better with your prescribed stimulant then keep taking it.

I thought this book was really good, and might help you and your husband to get a better grasp on what you鈥檙e going through.

u/lolabrigitta 路 1 pointr/ADHD

Have you read this book yet? book

u/FoulplayMurkrow 路 1 pointr/ADHD

This book helped me a lot. Perhaps, it will help you too?

https://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487

u/thedesklampdilemma 路 1 pointr/ADHD

Hey there, it's this book

u/BrFrancis 路 1 pointr/ADHD

If you prefer a book by ADHD parents - http://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487

and don't take as endorsement for amazon. I found it at my local library.

u/ConfusedD00d 路 1 pointr/ADHD

If you aren't medicating then maybe you should start that before you go looking for books? That said I foudn this one quite insightful https://www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487

However, I don't know that it fits your criteria...

u/RaxL 路 -22 pointsr/videos

Look, I can take a joke, even if it's a joke that makes fun of me. But Jefferies made a convincing argument that people with learning disabilities are stupid. No, he didn't around the bush or insinuate, he flat out said it. In fact, this video didn't even really bash Americans, it just bashed Americans with learning disabilities.

Here's the thing... As a person with a learning disability, how am I supposed to take this? Where was the punch line? Where was the funny part where I can laugh? In fact, what was the funny part?

From what I got from his performance, America scores lower on math and science placement tests than China because Americans are too confident. This over-confidence leads Americans to label those who struggle with learning as learning disabled. Americans attempt to empower the learning disabled instead of recognizing that they are actually stupid. These people fill our churches.

In short, people with learning disabilities are stupid and are bringing down America.

So, like I said, I can take a joke, but this just wasn't funny. Here's one, "What do you call Michael Jackson with a speech impediment? .... A WALRUS!" See, that's not funny and it's nothing to do with people with speech impediments being offended... it's just not funny because it's nonsensical. Jefferies stand-up is the same in that it's not funny.... or.... i cant see how it's supposed to be funny other than the bit about religious people having learning disabilities and therefore being stupid...

I don't know though... maybe I am stupid and bringing the country down... Despite the high scores from my IQ test, university has done a pretty excellent job of making me feel stupid and useless to society. I'm starting to think that another semester of Diff. Eq. isn't worth it and I should just go get some low paying job somewhere.

This book comes to mind