Best books about anxiety disorders according to redditors

Texts and Reference Books

Days in the Lives of Social Workers

DSM-5

Child Development, Third Edition: A Practitioner's Guide

Racial and Ethnic Groups

Social Work Documentation: A Guide to Strengthening Your Case Recording

Cognitive Behavior Therapy: Basics and Beyond

[Thoughts and Feelings: Taking Control of Your Moods and Your Life]
(https://www.amazon.com/Thoughts-Feelings-Harbinger-Self-Help-Workbook/dp/1608822087/ref=pd_sim_14_3?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=3ZW7PRW5TK2PB0MDR9R3)

Interpersonal Process in Therapy: An Integrative Model

[The Clinical Assessment Workbook: Balancing Strengths and Differential Diagnosis]
(https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0534578438/ref=ox_sc_sfl_title_38?ie=UTF8&psc=1&smid=ARCO1HGQTQFT8)

Helping Abused and Traumatized Children

Essential Research Methods for Social Work

Navigating Human Service Organizations

Privilege: A Reader

Play Therapy with Children in Crisis

The Color of Hope: People of Color Mental Health Narratives

The School Counseling and School Social Work Treatment Planner

Streets of Hope : The Fall and Rise of an Urban Neighborhood

Deviant Behavior

Social Work with Older Adults

The Aging Networks: A Guide to Programs and Services

[Grief and Bereavement in Contemporary Society: Bridging Research and Practice]
(https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0415884810/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o02_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1)

Theory and Practice of Group Psychotherapy

Motivational Interviewing: Helping People Change

Ethnicity and Family Therapy

Human Behavior in the Social Environment: Perspectives on Development and the Life Course

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

Generalist Social Work Practice: An Empowering Approach

Publication Manual of the American Psychological Association

The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook

DBT Skills Manual for Adolescents

DBT Skills Manual

DBT Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets

Social Welfare: A History of the American Response to Need

Novels

[A People’s History of the United States]
(https://www.amazon.com/Peoples-History-United-States/dp/0062397346/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1511070674&sr=1-1&keywords=howard+zinn&dpID=51pps1C9%252BGL&preST=_SY291_BO1,204,203,200_QL40_&dpSrc=srch)


The Man Who Mistook His Wife For a Hat

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time

Life For Me Ain't Been No Crystal Stair

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

Tuesdays with Morrie

The Death Class <- This one is based off of a course I took at my undergrad university

The Quiet Room

Girl, Interrupted

I Never Promised You a Rose Garden

Flowers for Algernon

Of Mice and Men

A Child Called It

Go Ask Alice

Under the Udala Trees

Prozac Nation

It's Kind of a Funny Story

The Perks of Being a Wallflower

The Yellow Wallpaper

The Bell Jar

The Outsiders

To Kill a Mockingbird

The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome is the best I've found, though it's geared more towards the parents of an Asperger's child. It's also the only resource I've seen that explains Asperger's in females and there are considerable differences between the characteristics in females and males. Relevant to me because my mate is also Asperger's.

You can also use Wikipedia's ability to view earlier versions. Look back about 8 years.

Not who you were talking to but...

Unfortunately no. I'm on the spectrum myself. Just high enough where I can pass as neurotypical most of the time. The English language alone can be convoluted; many words having multiple meanings when used in conjunction with other words.

What doesn't translate is my inability to read physical cues such as discomfort or agitation. Words only mean so much when you can't pick up the underlying "feel" of the person saying them. For example, "That's nice" can be used as a phrase for trying to end a conversation or encouraging the conversation to continue.

A book I'd recommend, if you get the chance, is The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome by Tony Attwood. It's helped me to cultivate a deeper understanding of how I work along with finally giving me a bit of closure as to why I process things the way I do.

The best analogy I can come up with, at the moment, is handing someone a hammer and telling them to "go hammer". You might have given them the tool but that doesn't mean that they can use it properly without prior knowledge.

Fear is an incredibly powerful tool for negativity. It's really ridiculous how "scared" our society is of everything.

This book is actually really really good about it.

https://www.amazon.com/Culture-Fear-Americans-Minorities-Microbes/dp/0465003362/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1537480072&sr=8-1&keywords=fear+book+why+americans

Thank you ☺️

And absolutely! I bought this book:
Retrain Your Brain: Cognitive... https://www.amazon.com/dp/1623157803?ref=yo_pop_ma_swf

I actually think I found it through someone else on this sub. It breaks down CBT in a way that allows you to “be your own therapist.” It guides you through 7 weeks the same way a therapist would: how does anxiety/depression affect X area of your life, what are your values, what are your goals for the next 7 weeks across all areas of life, track your activities/their importance/your enjoyment level, etc.

I’m only on week 2, but already I can see a difference in how I react to my anxious thoughts. At first I didn’t think the book would be right for me. A lot of the examples given are simplistic, more geared toward people with specific phobias, not GAD/panic disorder, etc. but once I got deeper into it I realized that it’s actually a great place to be honest with yourself and confront your anxiety in a non-intimidating way.

I would definitely recommend it!

Barry Glassner's The Culture of Fear has a good discussion of why those drops aren't discussed.

To (over?)simplify his work: People who are afraid of what might happen to them when they're outside are much more likely to stay home and watch TV, which is where all the product advertisements are.

I haven't read it, but Tony Attwood recommends Lynn Holiday's "Safety Skills for Asperger Women: How to Save a Perfectly Good Female Life" (https://www.amazon.com/dp/1849058369/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_AEX6Cb14JN4HC) and it seems relevant to your concerns.

Have you read Animal Madness: Inside Their Minds?

The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome by Tony Attwood they have a kindle version! I have loved his lectures/videos and has a LOT to say about how it's different with girls. Book seems more like a study/university class material, but good info!

Same. And if you're anything like me, at 7 years it gets to a scary dangerous point. I'm still struggling but I've been to rehab this past year and now I'm in a better place after an 8 year adderall addiction. First: you need a support system. Family, friends, just someone who will not judge you that you can be totally honest with about your addiction. Sometimes it helps to have a good therapist but I never stuck with one for very long. I've been to NA meetings and they are not for me. I do recommend rehab, if anything to just get 30 days straight clean and clear your head. Set some goals and try to figure yourself out while you're there. Once the drugs were gone for a couple weeks I realized I had no idea who I was. I still have no idea what to do with myself sometimes because I really made myself believe I needed Adderall to get anything done. If you can get a solid couple of weeks clean, I will tell you it does get easier. The first few weeks are the hardest. It's also hard when you relapse. Besides rehab, I also highly recommend this book: I Want to Change My Life: How to Overcome Anxiety, Depression and Addiction https://www.amazon.com/dp/1897572239/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_p4XeAbDJWYGWC. I hate therapy. This book is my therapist. It preaches mindfulness and helps you really understand what's going on when you can't stop taking more pills. If you're hesitant about rehab, you have to make a hard decision. This drug took 7 years of your life from you. Are you going to keep giving into it, or are you going to take your life back? Good luck to you and feel free to PM me if you need support. Adderall is one hell of a drug.

Therapist/mom here. I’m so sorry you’re going through such a hard time. I’ve struggled a bit with postpartum anxiety myself and I can’t overemphasize the importance of talking about it as much as possible- with a counselor/therapist, friend, partner, or anyone else you trust. Mental health struggles and the postpartum period are such lonely experiences independent of each other, but when combined are exponentially more isolating. Combating isolation is key.

You’re already doing a lot of the “right” things and your symptoms coming back and/or worsening doesn’t mean that you’re failing or doing anything wrong, it just means you need more support. Please tell your therapist about your morbid thinking if you haven’t already. Suicidal and vaguely suicidal thoughts are definitely scary, but very treatable. I’d also encourage you to ask for some referrals to a psychiatric provider for a medication evaluation. If you have a good relationship with your primary care doc, that can be a great place to start as well.

In my personal experience with postpartum anxiety, I found reading about it pretty helpful. The books I found gave me a tips for coping but, most importantly, I felt a lot less alone. Seeing in writing a (nearly) exact description of my experience was so validating.

Have you checked out either of these?

This Isn't What I Expected: Overcoming Postpartum Depression https://www.amazon.com/dp/0738216933/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_i8EnDbSF1E52E

Good Moms Have Scary Thoughts: A Healing Guide to the Secret Fears of New Mothers https://www.amazon.com/dp/1641701307/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_p9EnDbTY5Y912

Hang in there mama. This shit is hard.

Correction: The vast majority of diagnoed aspies are male. Apparently, there are a lot of undiagnosed girls, amongst others because the diagnostic criteria are based on the behaviour of males only (seeing as Hans Asperger only examined boys). As far as I understand, people are realizing more and more that girls have been socialized differently and are harder to spot. I think there's more about this in this book: http://www.amazon.com/Safety-Skills-Asperger-Women-Perfectly/dp/1849058369 (free preview for a lot of pages).

There's Turtles All the Way Down which is brilliant, about a girl with OCD, not exactly what you're looking for, but it's such a good book.

Are you looking for a memoir/non-fiction type book? If so, There's An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness

Edit: Didn't see that another commenter had already mentioned it. So you know it must be good!

How are you a professional psychologist, without any resources or training in the field you're going to be working in?

Autism is a very broad spectrum, I don't see how you can advice others in a professional setting, just by reading a layman's book or two.

That said, my understanding is that this is the single best book on Asperger's:
https://www.amazon.com/Complete-Guide-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1843106698

First of all, understand that autism is complex. Everyone is different and everyone is going to have unique ways in which their autistic traits are expressed, as well as unique ways that they cope with them and pass.

I [M31] would say that I'm at the "mild" end of the spectrum, though that glosses over a whole of of nuance and complexity to how it effects me and my life. If you want to know what that's like for me, here's a link to my blog where I've been documenting my diagnosis and evaluation process over the last several months.

If you're interested in other stories from people at the "mild" end of the spectrum, I'm personally fond of Musing of an Aspie.

So those are two personal perspectives, but neither is really comprehensive. If you want a higher level view of the subject, I would recommend The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome, by Tony Attwood. It's less personal, more clinical, and probably a bit harder of a read. But it's going to give you a very comprehensive view of the subject, and may cover traits that your boyfriend has but myself and others don't.

I would recommend Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Adult Asperger Syndrome. Not only is it very thorough, but it references a lot of other acedemic literature that you can follow up on reading afterwards.

Tony Attwood's The Complete Guide To Asperger's Syndrome

I bought it for my girlfriend and entire family when I "came out."

It's funny that you're worried about losing your friends when you admit you're actually smoking alone 10x a day...take time for that to set in. You'll find new friends! Your current friends are only your friends because you choose to only associate with stoners. If you're just worried about losing friends and not taking care of yourself, you're going to keep feeling (more) shitty and encounter bigger life issues as you get older. Lots of my real friends started families and had children, while I just laughed and said "why have a kid when you can have a boat!" The "friends" I associated through weed are NOT moving forward, stuck in their ways, and I now find myself sorta laughing at them for their stupid/non-coherent stoner talk. I used to smoke just as much, if not more, and 90% of the time by myself. You likely have some anxiety/depression issues you should address with a Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapist (MBCT). You should also explore meditation and find the true, inner you...he is waiting to come out if you're willing to allow him :) Here's a book you should check out! https://www.amazon.com/Want-Change-Life-Depression-Addiction/dp/1897572239

I haven't been diagnosed yet, so take what I say with a grain of salt.

With that said, I am 99.99% certain I have Asperger's. My wife agrees. The .01% would be taken care of by a diagnosis. Which I'm in the process of getting. I was diagnosed with other things in the past couple years but despite everything else getting better, something was still off. I came across a comment here about Asperger's in an unrelated sub, and when I started reading about it...everything made sense.

As far as I see, one of the main advantages of coming to terms with the fact that you have Asperger's is being able to recognize and eventually overcome a lifetime of negative feelings in response to knowing you're different, and others knowing you're different, but not being able to pin down why just leaves everyone frustrated. I'm not saying that's the case for everyone, some people have led successful and fulfilling lives I'm sure even undiagnosed. It's possible that if I didn't have my other health issues, I'd be better off.

But it's allowed me to forgive myself for a lifetime of self-criticism and guilt. It also allowed me to understand so many things about myself and others. It's given me a roadmap to find a little direction in a confusing world. There are guides and tips on how to navigate a society that is seemingly hostile to people on the spectrum. Strategies on how to better engage people, finding and keeping jobs that work for you, on whether or not to reveal your diagnosis, how to do so, etc.

Also, if you go back to a doctor and get therapy not only will it help with the Asperger's but they may treat some other underlying or comorbid thing like ADHD or anxiety.

I'm not saying you'd be eligible, I don't know enough about you. But depending on what country you're in, there are safety nets. In the US, while the programs are forever at risk, you can apply for disability if you haven't been working for awhile due to your health. You would meet with a disability lawyer and if they determine you may have a case, they help you get everything together including medical records. They'll help you apply as well. Some may ask you to apply the first time by yourself, because the first attempt is usually denied. The appeal is usually when the lawyers come in, and it's usually still denied. Then your lawyer will appeal again and you'll eventuallyyyy get a court date assigned. If you win, you get a certain amount awarded each month. You also get back pay: so if you get a $1000 a month, and you initiated the disability process 10 months before, you would get $10,000 in back pay. Your lawyer would get a percentage of that back pay, about 1/3. These are hypotheticals and ball park numbers, but that's the general idea. Definitely look it up. There are also state programs like temporary disability assistance.

There's also food stamps and Medicaid, etc.

I wouldn't force the job thing if you're not healthy. Really evaluate it. If you get a job, lose it , get another, lost it, not work for awhile... And so on? Especially if it's within a short time. But even if it's not in short time, look it up. That's not sustained employment which is what social security looks at to determine if you're eligible. So you may have a case.

Two things I'd recommend. Read this list (it's supposed to be for girls, but hit home with me):
https://the-art-of-autism.com/females-and-aspergers-a-checklist/

And get this book, and read it:
https://www.amazon.com/Complete-Guide-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1843106698

Those are just springboards.

As far as being alone, once you get better or in the midst of it, you can join support groups and go to community events, join Facebook groups, etc. there are meetups and other groups that get together to allow people with Asperger's and Autism to meet with others in a nonthreatening setting.

Also, sorry about your parents. Stay strong !

Wish you the best! And good luck on your journey. If you have any other questions I'll try my best to respond and help.

I'm on mobile btw, so I apologize for spelling/grammar/formatting lol.

Yes. As has been documented before by people like Tony Attwood, it's a major problem for girls (and guys, to a lesser extent) who lack good lie detection and creep detection skills and who are taught not to trust their own instincts or their understanding of rules and social expectations.

Being naive, gullible, and socially clueless makes us easy victims. Also, unlike a lot of NT girls, many girls who are on the spectrum don't have a network of close friends watching out for us, warning us about creepy guys.

In my teens and early 20s I tended to miss red flags that should have warned me away from certain guys. And, once in a relationship, if a guy told me that doing certain things or acting in certain ways was normal or expected, I tended to believe him, gullible idiot that I was. I was targeted repeatedly by men I now realize were sexual predators, including a severe abuser and manipulator who completely gaslighted me. That ended in a depression that was nearly fatal, but also led to my diagnosis as an Aspie @23.

There are two books listed on the u/Aspergirls Wiki that are directly aimed at helping girls and women on the spectrum avoid this kind of exploitation and abuse:

• Safety Skills for Asperger Women: How to Save a Perfectly Good Female Life, by Liane Holliday Willey. Foreword by Tony Attwood. "The focus throughout is on keeping safe, and this extends to travel, social awareness, and general life management. With deeply personal accounts from the author's own experiences, this book doesn't shy away from difficult issues such as coping with bullying, self-harm, depression, and eating disorders."
  
  
• The Aspie Girl’s Guide to Being Safe With Men, by Debi Brown. “This must-read book spells out the unwritten safety rules around dating, relationships and sex, informing and empowering them to live full and independent lives while staying safe.”
  
  I haven't read them, but other women on the Aspergirls sub have recommended them.

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) works but can be expensive. Seek out a psychologist with a PhD. Social phobia or anxiety is a common problem easily treated once therapy is started.
I worked in an anxiety clinic and Treatments that Work is an evidence-based, highly effective series for many forms of anxiety and fear (phobias).

I think all groups are sort of existential in nature. Common themes include anxiety about existence, identity and meaning. Our groups (ultra long term patients) often bring in psychoanalytical themes but we might just as easily try to get some cognitive flexibility in a thought process.

I think the value of groups is multifold:

Shared experiences with peers.
Multiple therapy modalities for the facilitator(s).
Social skills building.
Relationship building.
Less pressure on the participants etc.

I think a classic textbook on this is Yalom’s group psychotherapy:
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Theory-Practice-Group-Psychotherapy-Fifth/dp/0465092845

Culture of Fear may be worth reading for some insight

This book really helped me: This Isn't What I Expected: Overcoming Postpartum Depression https://www.amazon.ca/dp/0738216933/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_.GLEAbXWE3MN4

No problem! The first book that kind of led me down the path to cognitive restructuring was "The Feeling Good Handbook" by Dr. Burns. This was really eye opening, and after reading about the 10 thinking fallacies and doing the 3 column technique that he describes (at my own discretion) I saw and felt noticeable changes.

Then I started seeing a professional, and they helped guide me and point me in the proper direction. The book we used in therapy was this one, and it was very good:

https://www.amazon.com/Managing-Social-Anxiety-Cognitive-Behavioral-Treatments/dp/0195336690

In general, the therapy is called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, CBT, and is the most effective form of treatment for social anxiety.

Here's a quick and dirty article about how it works:

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/socratic-method-improve-depression_us_55ca2888e4b0f1cbf1e65731

Yes. If you're on the spectrum (or heck, even if you're not), you may be prone to over-stimulation. And if you have to logic out social situations that other women can effortlessly intuit, that may also drain you.

So comparing your anxiety to various Aspergers symptoms might help you identify triggers and figure out ways to mitigate them.

For example, if I work in a crowded office, I'll spend my breaks taking short walks outside. The fresh air and physical activity clear my head and it's excellent alone time. Or if I'm at a party, I'll clean up after other guests so I have something to focus on besides aimless socializing.

Though I doubt your GP would flag you as anything, there's a good chance she's simply not knowledgeable about this simply because she's a GP and not a specialist. You'd do better to see a therapist with experience on the spectrum.

At the very least, you might address anxiety by teaching yourself Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.

Your thesis seems to be that the voice is chemical, and therefore a feeling and not a thought, and therefore it controls your behavior directly.

However, thoughts, in turn, control feelings, and this can be demonstrated easily. Ever read something that made you happy or angry or sad? I'm pretty sure you can't transmit psychotropic medicines through the Internet. It's because your brain decoded the words into thoughts, and those thoughts triggered an emotional response, possibly by inspiring another train of thought.

And you can change your thinking habits over time. The best way is to write down what the "voices" are saying, so they can't hide from scrutiny. Then pick out the distortions in each of them, and write down a rational rebuttal that you can actually believe. This is pretty much the entire basis of cognitive-behavioral therapy, which Drs. David Burns and Albert Ellis have written about. According to them, you just have to do it once a day, and after enough time, your thinking habits change. Paperbacks tl;dr? Then read about it on about.com.

Good luck; I hope these tools are useful.

Get this book, please, it will be very helpful to understand them better.

Tony Attwood. The complete guide to Aspergers syndrome.

https://www.amazon.com/Complete-Guide-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1843106698

maybe you should try meditating? it takes some time getting used to but it should help you clear your mind. there are lots of apps for smartphones with guided mediations that are free.

another thing i can recommend is trying to do some at home CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) - there are loads of books online like this one and websites that can teach you basic ways to change your thought patterns as long as you're committed to it. ideally though, i think therapy would be a good idea, but i understand most students can't afford it :(

Checkout The Culture of Fear, which attempts to answer why we fear what we do. Great read. http://www.amazon.com/The-Culture-Fear-Americans-Minorities/dp/0465003362

The second best thing to therapy is self-therapy workbooks. CBT and DBT are both used for a variety of issues with a great deal of success. These workbooks are cheap, they're easy to follow, they are surprisingly very effective, and you have nothing to lose. You can take all the time you need by dedicating a little time each day to read and do the activities in the books.

FYI: DBT in particular has been noted for being more successful than traditional therapy in at least one study for suicidal tendencies.

Do you mean books for him or books for you to read about helping him?

For you, I've heard good things about Freeing Your Child From Anxiety and The Opposite of Worry. There's also a lot of great information on this website.

For him, it really depends on what the anxiety is about - does he have specific fears, or get anxious around separations from you, or at bedtime? I can probably give you more specific suggestions with more info, but some good general ones are Worries Are Not Forever, When I Feel Worried, The I'm Not Scared Book, and My Magic Breath. There are also some great books about emotions more generally such as My Many Colored Days, Visiting Feelings, and How is Daniel Feeing? which will help improve his emotional vocabulary and teach broader coping skills.

If you want to go even deeper read this book : https://www.amazon.com/Metacognitive-Therapy-Anxiety-Depression-Adrian/dp/1609184963/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1540144641&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=mct+therapy&dpPl=1&dpID=41JqVF-jGGL&ref=plSrch

If you're looking for a book to read, I would suggest this. I'm not sure whether or not it goes into the baby/toddler stages, but it's a really good wealth of information, and some of it may help you even if she's not diagnosed with Autism.

Honestly, the regression, and the inability to focus on sounds like Autism. For some of us, making eye contact is extremely overwhelming. Also, there can be a 2-3 second gap between when we hear something and when we "understand" or "translate" it (this is hard to describe, think of it like the message getting delayed between the ears/eyes/whatever to the brain because it has to be translated to what we can understand) which makes focusing when lots of people are talking difficult, which is why she might not be following. Regression is also a coping tactic that some people have, I myself included.

How does she react to sound? I don't mean a single loud sound, but like a constant, large amount of sound, like a crowd in a supermarket? It's quite easy to focus on the television, even for a toddler, but Autism makes it hard to block out things we don't want to hear which may result in meltdowns and shutdowns.

Meltdowns appear like temper tantrums, or covering the ears, crying, ect. while Shutdowns are when the person in question does unresponsive and non-verbal.

Another thing for you to look at would be her response to foods that have certain different type of textures. For me, having something slimy like sushi in my mouth makes me want to spit it out immediately.

Long post. ಠ_ರೃ I got too into it, sorry.

I don't know the kid so I can't say what's going through his head, but as an autistic adult I can tell you what these behaviours would mean if it were me in his position:

>So we just sit in the same room, not saying anything.

That's normal. You might think it's natural to have a connection and make conversation if you're sitting in the same room with someone, but that's not how he would see it. He's not ignoring you, dismissing you or afraid to talk to you; he's just doing his own thing, and you might as well be on the moon, for all he cares. Again, this isn't meant in a negative way. He's just hanging out, paying attention to his own whatever.

>When he does talk, his speech is terrible, to the point I can barely understand him and when I ask him to repeat himself, he gets super quiet so I can barely hear him.

He probably has trouble with speech. I can't modulate my tone of voice; it's always too soft or too loud and I tend to sound hurt or angry when I'm not. I had a speech delay and was severely hyperlexic as a baby/toddler, and although I can be eloquent in text, I don't speak very well. It's like being the opposite of someone who sounds intelligent when you talk to them, but as soon as they put pen to paper you realize they're virtually illiterate. I just don't speak well. Maybe he has the same problem.

>He sneaks around the house, trying to not make a noise.

Many of us are sensitive to sensory input. Maybe he just doesn't like noise. On the other hand, maybe he's used to having to sneak around so as not to attract his mother's attention. I wouldn't blame him for that.

> He doesn't do anything on his own, with out first being told. So if I tell him to get off the computer, he does, but then he'll sit there waiting for the next command.

Ouch. Please try REALLY hard not to be too hard on him for that one. Just go ahead and give him the next command. I'm a 32-year-old married woman with a child of my own, and I'm STILL like that. It's called executive dysfunction. I'm not trying to be difficult or lazy; it's just that the next move honestly doesn't occur to me. Cleaning the kitchen is a Herculean task for me, and we're buying a Roomba next week. :-/


All in all, it sounds like the kid could benefit from some therapy. If you can't afford that, then look into ways you can help him yourself. Start with learning about executive dysfunction and handling children who've been abused. Also, consider this book. It's not perfect but it's easy to read and might be a good introduction for you.

I see, in reading the comments, that you aren't very motivated to seek counseling, which is fine. Frankly, it isn't for everybody.

I'm a strong proponent of Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, due to the fact that it has completely turned my life around. This is something you can do WITHOUT professional help. There are many really awesome, step-by-step workbooks out there to walk yourself through CBT at your own pace. This one was the one I used primarily, and I think it's awesome. There are plenty out there, though, and I encourage finding what works for you. There is no one-size-fits-all thing for this kind of problem.

When looking for valid information about asperger syndrome on the internet lookout for 2014-to this day, or DSM-5 related. Otherwise you might end up reading not up to date stuff that has no more scientifical value. Autism changed dramatically in tbe last few years.

Tony Attwood is an up-to-date psychologist. You can't go wrong with him. He is the Asperger's whisperer of our era. You should definitely get his book:
The complete guide to Asperger syndrome

I was, at one point, the most negative human on planet earth, and quite proud of it.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) transformed my wife and I from extremely negative people to positive, grateful people.

The CBT for Dummies Workbook is a must-read.

It is a goal-oriented, short-term therapy that is supported by tons of scientific research.

It's simple, logical, and it just works.

Mindfulness Meditation is one aspect of CBT, but it is not sufficient by itself.

I wrote this, which might also help you as well.

P.S. I just looked, and the author released a Tenth Anniversary Edition in 2010.

It makes sense. I think you had good intentions: staying busy and working hard. It's just there's a balance. And while a good distraction here and there might be nice, you don't want to avoid the proper dialogues you need to have with yourself.

I'm a big fan of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Instead of tracing things back to the source, it focuses on what to do in the moment when triggers flare. I like the book Retrain Your Brain because it goes through the CBT stuff in an easy to read and digest manner. Not too theoretical. Each chapter had me nodding with how it made sense. See if your library has a copy.

If you're a more auditory learner, try listening to one of Noah Elkrief's videos. I'll link this one How to Forgive Yourself.

I'm usually wary of any life coachy type of talk, and Noah doesn't seem to have and therapist credentials. That said, if you listen to a few of his videos, he seems to ask the right questions. And you'll notice he repeats certain themes a lot... Because those are the questions you need to ask yourself.

Good luck!

Sure! These are just a few that I've read...
They're not all completely geared toward adults with ASD and talk about kids too, but they do address adults at some point.


The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome https://www.amazon.com/dp/1843106698/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_qQ5IxbWGWAG3D


The Way I See It, Revised and Expanded 2nd Edition: A Personal Look at Autism and Asperger's https://www.amazon.com/dp/193527421X/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_yT5IxbVXQE7BR

Twirling Naked in the Streets and No One Noticed: Growing Up With Undiagnosed Autism https://www.amazon.com/dp/0615801439/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_4W5Ixb5QJMGZ7

Very Late Diagnosis of Asperger Syndrome (Autism Spectrum Disorder): How Seeking a Diagnosis in Adulthood Can Change Your Life https://www.amazon.com/dp/1849054339/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_TM5IxbSRTX1HR

bagă o carte pe subiect, merge la fix

alternativ mai expune-te mult la problemele altora si situatii neplacute si o sa devii automat jaded asshole, si asta ajuta. succes!

http://www.amazon.com/Complete-Guide-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1843106698

As a diagnosed aspie with 43 AQ points, I agree. You seem to have the traits(you do not have to have them all) and high functioning too. If you want more reading into it, I am currently reading http://www.amazon.com/Complete-Guide-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1843104954, mostly for fun. It tells how I could have been diagnosed during my childhood but nobody cared.

I'm doing this on a throwaway account, but I just wanted to say I also have aspergers and it doesn't mean you can't be a productive member of society. I've graduated college, am certified to teach high school social studies, and worked as a substitute teacher for a semester before entering grad school. Other jobs I've had included temporary park ranger (summer position), target (doing carts, my first job), and data entry. I've never really been outgoing or had many friends, and had some problems in school, but this hasn't stopped me. There's no need to live a life of hell just because of aspergers syndrome. To the op: I'd suggest 2 things. 1 finding an online community, smaller than reddit related to your interests (don't tell people you have aspergers there) to post and interact with. 2, if you aren't already getting meaningful exercise in some way - start going to the gym - its amazing what increased fitness can do for self confidence.



Here's a couple books that might help, or let those interested learn more:
http://www.amazon.com/Complete-Guide-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1843106698/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1302796022&sr=8-1

http://www.amazon.com/Pretending-Be-Normal-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1853027499/ref=sr_1_12?ie=UTF8&qid=1302796022&sr=8-12

best of luck

So long as you aren't suicidal, nothing wrong with self-education. The professional community is lacking in ASD as a whole.

Being forced to NT standards, and then burning out because of it sounds common.

Here are some resources that I know of... I was just diagnosed, and some of these were recommended by the psychologist who made the diagnosis. I am a man, but I have mostly female stereotyped manifestation/traits of ASD.

Pretending to Be Normal: Living With Asperger's Syndrome by Liane Holliday Willey

https://www.amazon.com/Pretending-Normal-Aspergers-Syndrome-Spectrum/dp/1849057559/

The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome by Tony Attwood

https://www.amazon.com/Complete-Guide-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1843106698/

And for free you can check out Cynthia Kim's Blog:

https://musingsofanaspie.com/about/

She has a book too:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1849057575/

Interesting. You are the first person my age who has shared this, so thank you!

I did not remember much of my childhood until I started reading Dr. Tony Attwood's book. I recognized some traits and it got me to flash back to certain events. I think my brain suppressed most of my childhood and early teens because they were such negative years for me.

The book: https://www.amazon.ca/Complete-Guide-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1843106698/ref=pd_sbs_14_9?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=1843106698&pd_rd_r=93f5b6d3-d069-4a74-b84a-32f47ac219f8&pd_rd_w=zoaC2&pd_rd_wg=94MbY&pf_rd_p=5a0f6968-18a5-43ab-a560-10f088b58e7e&pf_rd_r=VWWGB40M0WDQBHHZTGZ0&psc=1&refRID=VWWGB40M0WDQBHHZTGZ0

For some years I have not been interested in making any friends as I loose them all, just like my jobs. When I retired five years ago, I determined to isolate myself. We now live in the country in a small village by a lake and a mountain and it is Aspie Heaven!

My wife and I have told most of her inner circle that I have AS and everyone has been very accepting. Most have known us for over 30 years anyway and they have always accepted me as I am. I have cut myself off from my past and former colleagues and family. I am better off for it. Not having to work and being a pensioner has made a great difference. My mental and physical condition has actually improved since we moved here in May!

This is the closest I have ever come to happiness, and I hope you are happy too!

Sounds extremely common. PPD. If I may recommend a book: This Isn’t What I Expected

OK. Well thanks for replying. Maybe posting here will help you out. That's certainly why I'm reading through this board. Also, I've just started to unravel myself with this book: The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome

I've only just started it, but fingers crossed. I hope you find something to help.

[This](Freeing Your Child from Anxiety, Revised and Updated Edition: Practical Strategies to Overcome Fears, Worries, and Phobias and Be Prepared for Life--f https://www.amazon.com/dp/0804139806/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apip_jfI3QABCAUFPr) book was highly recommended to me by my daughter's case worker. I haven't gotten through all of it yet (I skipped to how to deal my youngest's main problem which is selective mutism) but I have found it very helpful so far. My middle child has a lot of generalized anxiety.

It sounds like you feel completely trapped and helpless, which is definitely a huge component of depression. I've been there, and it sucks. It feels like it's impossible to do anything to make your situation better because you don't have the energy or motivation, right?

Honestly the best thing you can do is get treatment for your depression - that's the major thing blocking you from making any changes right now. Are you seeking any treatment already? I don't know your situation or your parents, but the best solution would be to go to your doctor, start experimenting with meds to see if they help, and find a therapist to talk to. Failing that, use online therapy, or buy a CBT workbook, or even get one from the library. There's even a few great websites for CBT like https://moodgym.com.au.

Something clearly needs to change, and I really believe your depression is at the crux of all these issues. It's almost impossible to make other changes until your mental health improves. Good luck, and stay safe on your trip!

Whispers: The Voices of Paranoia - not so much about schizophrenia directly, but a great read.

I read ACT Made Simple by Russ Harris, maybe 18 months ago and still refer back to it. I love this book. I knew virtually nothing about ACT before that and the book/resources make it feel very approachable and usable.

I have some experience using Wells' metacognitive model for both depression and anxiety. I find that it's a useful alternative to a classical CBT approach when rumination or worry is the main problem. Sometimes when i go the classic CBT route with identifying dysfunctional thoughts it just leads to more rumination. When they come to see me they have already spent a lot of time trying to think differently, and just feel like they have lost control over their thoughts.

I use the tratment plan outlined in Wells' book about metacogntive therapy for anxiety and depression, found here. I also tend to use a lot of metaphors when i explain the model.

Culture of Fear is a great book that really elaborates on all of this stuff.

https://www.amazon.com/Animal-Madness-Inside-Their-Minds/dp/1451627017

This isn’t a philosophical book but it does provide some phenomenalogical accounts that I found valuable.

• The Third Wave by Alvin Toffler.
  
• Waking Up Screaming by H.P. Lovecraft
  
• I Will Fear No Evil by Robert A. Heinlein
  
• The Culture of Fear: Why Americans are Afraid of the Wrong Things by Barry Glassner
  
• White Mischief: A Cultural History of Cocaine by Tim Madge
  
  Edit for n00b formatting.

I'm currently working through this program.

http://www.amazon.com/Managing-Social-Anxiety-Workbook-Edition/dp/0195336690

My therapist suggested it, but she also says it's something that one could work through on their own. I looked at various medications, but all of them had potential side effects that I didn't want and no matter what, when you stop taking them, the anxiety comes back. This program teaches your brain to identify the triggers of anxiety, and to stop it before it spirals out of control.

it also alluded to in Whispers: The Voices of Paranoia by Ronald K. Siegel. A very interesting book in and of itself (FYI his book titled Fire in the Brain is fascinating as well).

It can be kind of tough to find a good group, as they are sort of hard to organize and coordinate. Psychology Today has a therapist finder search which you can then filter by "group". This is sort of the seminal book on group therapy and really explains everything about them group.. In terms of evaluation really check out how the facilitator interacts with the group. There are usually certain archetypes in every group, (the know it all, the boss, the victim, etc.) and if the leader doesn't know how to manage all of the personalities, the group can really lose its ability to be effective.

Newsflash, sex isn't just about making babies. When was the last time you had sex for making babies? You know nothing of childhood sexuality. Further, only 4% of childhood cases of sex caused trauma and only because they were violent. The rest either enjoyed the experience or didn't care either way. Read The Trauma Myth and look up the Rind et al research.

I bet you're one of those idiots who thinks there's no such thing as human nature, and that sex doesn't play a part of it. Again, do research before spouting bull shit.

Studies of child-hood sexuality:

http://www.ethicaltreatment.org/research.htm

http://www.ipce.info/booksreborn/martinson/infant/InfantAndChildSexuality.html

http://newgon.com/wiki/Main_Page

http://sexuality.spaceandmotion.com/sexual-development-children-teen.htm

http://www.ejhs.org/volume3/Haroian/body.htm

Studies done into the psychology industry:

http://www.amazon.com/First-Do-No-Harm-Industry/dp/0864700474/ref=sr_1_42?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347509168&sr=1-42&keywords=first+do+no+harm

http://newgon.com/wiki/Main_Page

http://www.srmhp.org/0402/child-abuse.html

http://www.srmhp.org/0402/repression.html

http://www.ipce.info/library/web-article/trauma-myth-susan-clancy-book-review

http://transres.freeweb7.com/levine.html

http://www.ipce.info/library_2/files/rind_jen.htm

http://www.nambla.org/trauma_myth.html

http://tanadineen.com/writer/writings/sexualharass.htm

Manufacturing Victims: http://tanadineen.com/documents/MV3.pdf

http://www.amazon.com/Harmful-To-Minors-Protecting-Children/dp/0816640068/ref=wl_it_dp_o_pdT1_S_nC?ie=UTF8&colid=76HTLA12QPTR&coliid=I2ZYLJADY7SNA0

http://www.amazon.com/Erotic-Innocence-Culture-Child-Molesting/dp/0822321777/ref=wl_it_dp_o_pC_S_nC?ie=UTF8&colid=76HTLA12QPTR&coliid=I2OBVH6P4AIKLB

Articles and books on the hysteria and others:

http://www.amazon.com/The-Culture-Fear-Americans-Minorities/dp/0465003362

http://bigthink.com/ideas/41459

http://www.addictinginfo.org/2011/11/29/six-year-old-wisconsin-boy-being-prosecuted-for-playing-doctor-with-a-five-year-old/

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,460225,00.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kern_County_child_abuse_cases

http://newgon.com/wiki/Main_Page

http://www.srmhp.org/0402/child-abuse.html

http://web.archive.org/web/20050310183555/http://logicalreality.com/openbb/board.php?FID=61

http://human-stupidity.com/stupid-dogma/faulty_science/us-congress-senate-condemn-scientific-researc

http://mirror.wikileaks.info/wiki/An_insight_into_child_porn/

http://human-stupidity.com/stupid-dogma/child-porn-witch-hunt/children-loved-child-porn-modeling-photo-sessions-were-the-highlight-of-my-life-children-traumatized-by-federal-government-prosecution

http://www.ipce.info/ipceweb/Library/i_did_not_know.htm

http://www.b4uact.org/facts.htm

http://www.vice.com/read/the-a-to-z-of-sexual-history-incest

http://www.historyundressed.com/2009/08/incest-within-royal-families.html

http://www.srmhp.org/0402/repression.html

http://human-stupidity.com/stupid-dogma/child-porn-witch-hunt/legal-child-pornography-reduces-child-sex-crimes-milton-diamond-hawaii

http://human-stupidity.com/stupid-dogma/teenage-sexuality/child-porn-laws-kill-destroy-lives-judge-jack-b-weinstein

http://transres.freeweb7.com/levine.html

http://human-stupidity.com/irrationality/stupid-dogma/child-porn-witch-hunt

http://falkvinge.net/2012/09/11/child-porn-laws-arent-as-bad-as-you-think-theyre-much-much-worse/

The ultimate book on Aspergers. The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome https://www.amazon.com/dp/1843104954/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_InH9ub082RZ87
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1843104954/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_InH9ub082RZ87

What, specifically, do you want? Social skills? Relationships?

Maybe have her read The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome by Tony Attwood, or read it yourself so can explain your situation more effectively to her.

This is probably the best book I've read on AS. Reading through this, it all made sense. Try to get a copy, it will be helpful.

You can not change the past, and you can not change the beliefs of others. You are right - this sort of abuse and toxicity can permeate a whole family. Sometimes there is no solution apart from looking after yourself, There is no point in joining in the craziness just to prove you are right & they are wrong.

I suggest you talk to a therapist, including Acceptance & Commitment.

www.amazon.com/gp/product/1572247053


https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/two-takes-depression/201102/acceptance-and-commitment-therapy


Whether it be a situation you cannot control, a personality trait that is hard to change or an emotion that overwhelms, accepting it can allow you to move forward. Obsessing, worrying and playing things over and over keep you stuck. In this sense, asking why can leave you helpless. ACT invites you to accept the reality and work with what you have.

There are some books on amazon about CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy). It is about your thoughts which produce an emotion regarding a situation.

Soyou have to "reframe" your thinking in a way to free yourself from those intrusive thoughts.

The good part is that it not only works for one specific mind frame or set of thoughts, you can use it to cope with jealousy issues, anxiety,insecurity, phobias, etc.

You should give it a shot ;)

https://www.amazon.com/Retrain-Your-Brain-Behavioral-Depression/dp/1623157803/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1485722758&sr=8-5&keywords=cbt

Hi!

When you say do you have a good read on anxiety symptoms? Do you mean do I have any good books to recommend on anxiety symptoms that are available worldwide?

A good resource would be the self-study, online course [Master Your Public Speaking Fear] (https://speakmeister.com/edu/product/master-your-public-speaking-fear/). I'm the author of this course, and it explains the symptoms in detail with video animations so you can see exactly how fear works and how to control it. You can take it at anytime from anywhere (it works like a Netflix movie where you can watch it immediately). I don't know of another resource that really explains the symptoms. That's why I created the course - I couldn't find much that gave a good explanation with animations. I'm happy to chat with anyone who takes the course for free (by chat, email or phone) to answer any questions and help you apply the material to your situation.

These books don't really go into the symptoms in detail, but they can be very helpful:

▪︎ [Books by Claire Weeks] (http://www.amazon.com/Claire-Weekes/e/B001HOT92I/ref=dp_byline_cont_book_1)

▪︎ [Your phobia: Understanding your fears through contextual therapy] (https://www.amazon.com/Your-Phobia-Harry-Zane-Manuel/dp/0446346039/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1469118949&sr=1-2&keywords=manuel+zane+phobia)

▪︎ [Triumph Over Fear: A Book of Help and Hope for People with Anxiety, Panic Attacks and Phobias] (https://www.amazon.com/Triumph-Over-Fear-Anxiety-Attacks/dp/0553374443/ref=sr_1_5?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1469119054&sr=1-5&keywords=manuel+zane+phobia)

▪︎ [Managing Social Anxiety: A Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy Approach] (https://www.amazon.com/Managing-Social-Anxiety-Cognitive-Behavioral-Treatments/dp/0195336690/ref=pd_sim_14_1?ie=UTF8&dpID=51%2B71pysxCL&dpSrc=sims&preST=_AC_UL320_SR244%2C320_&psc=1&refRID=R91TS49Z6SX7TQYRDKRT)

Note: In the next week, I'll be publishing an ebook on Amazon that will contain much of the same material as the course with links to the video animations. When it's ready, I'll post the link here. If you want me to notify you, PM me here with your email or fill out the "Keep Me Informed" form on the bottom of the page at https://speakmeister.com/edu.

ASD here as well. However, I'm not going to directly answer your question, rather look at your example. First, comparing between yourself and your brother is more likely to get false results than some non-related person. Second, and more importantly, the brain processes different information differently. For instance tools are processed as their function. If I say HAMMER, you would most likely picture it hammering a nail (or respond with TIME). This isn't true of non-tool objects/concepts.

I read The Complete Guide to Asperger's (Tony Atwood), but it was years ago I don't recall how he described it. But, I really don't care either. Any "difference" you can point to is going to a difference of magnitude. I'm me, and that's enough. If it isn't, oh fucking well. Deal.

(But it's a good question that - assuming it hasn't been answered - needs an answer, particularly to develop educational strategies.)

> What happens when someone you thought was a friend just says that they let you lean on them because you're needy and you were having a rough time?

I don't quite understand what you're saying: that's sort of what friends are supposed to do (let you lean on them when times are rough). Are you worried that they're only listening to you out of pity? That may be true, but you could also be selling them a bit short. If perhaps they feel you are leaning on them too much, it might be wise to cut back with that one particular friend and rely on someone else as well to talk to, but it is important to talk to someone.

If you're getting stuck in these vicious cycles and circular thinking, you should really see a therapist, because that's what they shine at untangling. The only way to break a vicious cycle is to throw a wrench in the whole thing and go from there. If you find that you're dealing with your depression by talking to the same person, and you say the same thing, in the same way, at the same time after having eaten the same sandwhich for lunch, and that he rolls his eyes at you the same way he did the 14 other times he heard you say exactly the same thing, maybe it's time to try something different. To go back to my being in a hole analogy, maybe that means that you stop trying to dig yourself out of the hole by doing exactly the same thing you've been doing for so long. After all, it hasn't gotten you out. And that's all beating yourself up as done: keep you in exactly the same place.

I had a lot of success with ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy). It has a strong focus on mindfulness activities, and has a strong body of empirical research (which isn't as common as you might think) to back up its use. I also ripped my analogy straight from an ACT text, so if you didn't think it was the most retarded thing you've ever heard you might want to check out the following books.

A quick ACT primer:
http://www.socialworktoday.com/archive/090208p36.shtml


The ACT "Bible". This one is more of a clinical manual but it is fairly accessible.

ACT Made Simple The content of the above made for non clinicians.

Things might go terribly, horribly wrong. This one is meant for clients, and isn't really a self help book. There's a big focus on dealing with anxiety, which may not apply so much too you but the strategies for cognitive defusion are kind of the same as what I think an ACT therapist would recommend for you to do.

Find an ACT therapist:
http://contextualpsychology.org/civicrm/profile?gid=17&reset=1&force=1
or
www.psychologytoday.com "Find a therapist"

OK, this might scare him; and seems to be true:

Autism and aspergers seems to be cured / treatable with stem cell therapy.

Stem cells can be naturally obtained by getting pregnant (stem cells migrate from the baby to the Mother)
If your daughter is not otherwise treated, she might get better when she gets pregnant.

This literature does not support the above, but contains a review of many other treatments

including this handy one-page summary,

and another redditor recently recommended this

There isn't?

http://www.zazzle.com/flappy_happy_t_shirt-235660970405064707
http://portal.wpspublish.com/portal/page?_pageid=53,190663&_dad=portal&_schema=PORTAL
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss_gw/002-8452392-8940808?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=Aspergers&x=0&y=0
http://www.amazon.com/Complete-Guide-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1843106698/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1216825309&sr=8-2
http://www.amazon.com/Look-Me-Eye-Life-Aspergers/dp/0307396185/ref=pd_bbs_3?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1216825309&sr=8-3

I Want to Change My Life

Author did a study of many, many forms of meditation from the world over and broke it down to the common elements.

His example that I heard was "If one form tells you to put your left hand over your right, and another tells you to put your right hand over your left, then obviously it doesn't matter which you do, so I left it out."

He breaks it down to, if I recall, 5 simple things, and this is how I learned to meditate and have for the last 4 years.

I've read his book. It was interesting. I will check out the video, thanks for sharing.

Hey, sorry I took a while getting back to you. I haven't been on reddit for a while.

It's hard to recommend a single book because Ellis wrote on such a broad range of issues, from dealing with anger, sexual shame, anxiety, depression, relationships, procrastination etc etc.

Probably the best all-rounder book from Ellis is:

A Guide to Rational Living, which can be picked up pretty cheap second hand, and covers:

>1. Overcoming the influences of your past

>2. Refusing to be desperately unhappy

>3. Tackling dire needs for approval

>4. Eradicating dire fears of failure

>5. How to feel undepressed though frustrated

>6. Conquering anxiety

>7. Acquiring self-discipline

amongst other things.

CBT has probably developed techniques and protocols for dealing with eating disorders, so I would highly recommend trying to talk to a school counsellor or check out a local library about that, but for having a mental toolset that will help you with anything, I haven't come across anything better than REBT.

The Myth of Self Esteem and How to Control your Anxiety before It controls you might also be of use.

Overcoming Destructive Beliefs, Feelings, and Behaviors: New Directions for Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy and Overcoming resistance: a rational emotive behavior therapy integrated approach are two of the most recent books from Ellis, though they are more expensive so I'd recommend starting with A Guide to Rational Living, and if it seems worthwhile to you then perhaps the newer books will have some extra insight for you.

There also seems to be a book on REBT specifically about eating disorders called The Art & Science of Rational Eating though I have not read it so I can't speak to its quality. Regardless of the ad-speak on the cover it claims to have specific focus on Bulimia and Anorexia so it may be worth checking out amongst others, but will likely not give you as full a overview of REBT as some of the other books I've mentioned.

You make a decent point in that therapy won't fix Asperger's. It's a developmental disorder, and is to a certain extent a part of the person. However, to say that therapy cannot help with the meta-emotions, associated features, and comorbidities is an overreach. This is a great book on the topic. While primarily aimed at clinicians, it is a great read to get a feel of what therapy can, and cannot, do for Asperger's.

I take issue with your "often make the situation worse" statement. That's a bold claim, and bold, testable claims on this subreddit require evidence. (Aside: Holy shit. $2,000? Do you not have health insurance?)

I don't know what this is about, but I doubt it's turtles.

I don’t know your severity but I could recommend some workbooks to help, here’s one that has pretty good reviews online.

I always like to tell people that a therapist could be anyone/anything, not to downplay all of their hard work and dedication but in the very simplest form all they really did was study books that are available to you as well - you have the same capabilities to help yourself but it will take some time and work

Retrain Your Brain: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in 7 Weeks: A Workbook for Managing Depression and Anxiety

Student manual: https://www.amazon.com/Radically-Open-Dialectical-Behavior-Therapy/dp/1626259283/ref=sr_1_1

Managing Social Anxiety: A Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy Approach has helped me a lot and if you're in therapy I highly recommend integrating it into your treatment.

I'll remember him when I swing by Barnes and Noble. You should look at this:

https://www.amazon.com/Culture-Fear-Americans-Minorities-Microbes/dp/0465003362

Well that's also a workbook, so it's meant for the layperson. I would recommend "ACT Made Simple" by Russ Harris. I love ACT, but I don't believe in pushing it on people. I'm only mentioning it because of the modalities you've listed in your initial answer. ACT utilizes in-session present-moment awareness (Gestalt), responding to thoughts (CBT; although it takes a different approach), Mindfulness, Values (Logotherapy), and committed action (CBT, SFBT). It draws on all of these therapies, as well as other modalities, such as emotion-focused therapy, to create what I consider a very comprehensive model that allows one to be eclectic, while also being true to the model. I am biased, but I love it. Start with "ACT Made Simple". I think you can read the first couple of chapters on Amazon's preview.

https://www.amazon.com/ACT-Made-Simple-Easy-Read/dp/1572247053

https://www.amazon.com/Retrain-Your-Brain-Behavioral-Depression/dp/1623157803/

It's pretty much just talking, but that seems to move things forward more than anything because I'm like 99% left brain. I *just* picked up a book on RO-DBT from the library - has been indicated for + seems promising for schiz. It's a hefty 520p and could double as a weapon, so there's a good chance something in there could be useful. All the other schiz books I've read have been informative (oohhh, so that's a schiz thing!?) but not actually helpful (wtf to do about it).

Will post more after I dig in...

Good idea. I also found this book helpful in not feeling so alone: This Isn’t What I Expected

Well done on getting your diagnosis, I hope it's at least some weight off your mind to know that some of your 'odd' perceptions/experiences are 'only to be expected' (if you see what I mean). I felt relieved when I got my AS diagnosis at 29 since I too was really struggling with anxiety/depression, and I found out how 'normal' it was for undiagnosed Aspies to feel the same.

1. With your first question I can only say "Stay relaxed. There is a 'right person' for you out there somewhere." I was in an on-again off again relationship for six years, and I found that one by getting chatting to a girl in a pub one day. If you're on dating sites and/or go to pubs/bars/coffee shops, then you're half of the way there already. It's a huge cliché but you can cut out a lot of pain/effort/anxiety by not pretending to be someone else in order to get a GF. "Be yourself", and talk to people you like. Oh, and if you're worried about people taking certain things the wrong way, try your best to communicate with them as much as possible. Explain that 'I really like you, and don't want you to feel [X, Y, or Z], so please can you let me know if you ever feel worried about this.'
   
   
2. (I posted this the other day):
   I'm happy I got an Aspergers diagnosis because (amongst other things) I was able to identify causal links between particular situations and personal responses/outcomes that had not occurred to me previously (e.g. - social events make me really tired really quickly, and interpersonal communication problems were causing me to drink more than I should).
   It also (crucially) gave me a 'solid reason' why I want to be on my own a lot of the time. This stuff was making me feel really guilty, because I was concerned that others would think I hated them. I was beating myself up, depressed and anxious. Since I got the diagnosis I can say "I'm sorry, I just need to take some time out here", or "I'm sorry, I'm going to take a rain check on that, but I'll message you later".
   TL;DR: It makes me feel less guilty to know there is a structural difference in my brain that makes me think/feel/need certain things.
   I would recommend starting out by reading Steve Silbermann's book 'Neurotribes'. If you're female, there are books like 'Aspergirls' by Rudy Simone which may be of particular interest. I'm a big fan of Prof Tony Attwood; he's got a huge book out called 'The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome', which is a great reference guide. I'd also recommend checking out some of his talks on YouTube, especially 'Could it be Aspergers?'.
   
   
   
3. Other than using online forums, I'd recommend having a look for local meets/support groups in your area. I can't be sure about the U.S./rest of the World, but here in the UK there are council initiatives/free workshops/discount services run in most places for people on the spectrum. Either pop into your local Citizen's Advice Bureau or check online on your council's website.
   
   If you want me to expand on any of this info, please let me know and I'll see what I can do. Good luck with everything; it sounds like we're in a very similar situation :)
   
   EDIT: I wrote some general stuff about coping with anxiety in this thread over on r/anxiety.
   
   
   

Happy to! It's "Retrain Your Brain: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in 7 Weeks."
Amazon UK;
Amazon US (Holy shit, so expensive for some reason?!).

Allow me to suggest a more informative text: 'The Culture of Fear' by Barry Glassner

>Specifically, NOT a police officer, because kids can't tell the difference between that and a security guard, and many security guards are just people with a desire to have authority.

Are you kidding me?

>Mostly, I think the priority of "someone with little kids" over anyone else is appropriate. They will be more tuned in to the needs of children, and are more likely to take the time to help and understand how to talk to kids.

Are you kidding me?

Edit: Removed abusive language.

I bought this for my sister a little ways back.

https://www.amazon.com/Retrain-Your-Brain-Behavioral-Depression/dp/1623157803/

Hello! I'm a library clerk and live with my SO in an apartment in Austin where we wish we had a dog. I usually play video games, read or listen to music. My favorite game lately is Stardew Valley because it's so soothing and the gameplay pacing is basically up to you. It's got a great community/conservation feel to it! If you're looking for music recommendations, my favorite artist is Robert Francis. He's an amazing musician, and his voice can improve any bad mood I'm in! I especially love his songs Violet and Some Things Never Change, though I've never found a song of his I don't like! As for book recommendations, I recently read Turtles All the Way Down and I really enjoyed it! It was an excellent portrayal of how mental disorders are experienced first-hand.

If you are genuinely curious on why, there is an excellent book called "Culture of Fear":

http://www.amazon.com/The-Culture-Fear-Americans-Minorities/dp/0465003362/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1342914601&sr=8-1&keywords=culture+of+fear

The Culture of Fear: Why Americans Are Afraid of the Wrong Things: Crime, Drugs, Minorities, Teen Moms, Killer Kids, Mutant Microbes, Plane Crashes, Road Rage, & So Much More [Paperback]

I am finding it very challenging. Even thinking about times that I've felt anxious can make me feel anxious, and this method pretty much requires you to look at anxiety and dissect it. There's also substantial 'homework' in the form of one or two page worksheets where you try to identify the individual thoughts, feelings, behaviors, physiological symptoms (heart racing, tingling in extremities, tightness in the chest, and such).

I found a therapist that had some pretty impressive credentials on the internets, met with her and chose her out of the other ones I was checking out. Her assessment was to work on the social anxiety first since it is looking like my largest issue and to see what's left - she claims that often other problems like depression go away when you can handle your social anxiety. I agree with her, and am so far still impressed.

She started me almost immediately on a workbook she's used before titled Managing Social Anxiety. There are a couple of other social anxiety workbooks I've seen, but I'm focusing on this one first. And maybe last! I'm sure it's possible for someone to go through these sorts of workbooks alone, though I find the therapist really helps keep me honest - as in presenting to me things that I hadn't even realized I was avoiding.

The general idea for CBT (as far as I can tell, I'm no expert) is that you learn how to catch these thoughts and feelings and try to cast them in a more objective light to see if your reaction is reasonable. CBT can be effective for many other disorders, too.

I am hoping it will help.

I'm impressed you've stuck with it as long as you have! I also have social anxiety, and I sure as hell would not be making myself leave the house and go to a group where everyone made fun of me for my ADHD tendencies.

If you feel up to working on this on your own, I would recommend getting a CBT workbook for anxiety. Something like this: http://www.amazon.com/Managing-Social-Anxiety-Workbook-Cognitive-Behavioral/dp/0195336690

My own treatment plan right now is an SSRI for three months. My psychiatrist explained that it will take the edge off my anxiety, making it easier for me to learn new, healthier habits. Frequently, the new habits and greater confidence continues after the medication is discontinued.

Here's the workbook: http://www.amazon.ca/Cognitive-Behavioural-Therapy-Workbook-Dummies/dp/1119951402/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1452196620&sr=8-1&keywords=cbt+workbook+for+dummies

Here's my video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JfGdvfyZIwg

Some do. There’re documented examples of self-harm, if not suicide, by animals in captivity, under stress, or otherwise in unhealthy living conditions. And then there’s the animal version of mental disorder. Lots of examples in Animal Madness—quite an eye-opening book for me.

Self-help CBT books have been shown to be as effective as thousands of dollars of visits with a therapist. As long as a person commits and does the exercises, it can really change things around.

In addition to seconding your book rec, I'd recommend also "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in 7 Weeks" by Seth Gillihan, and "Mind Over Mood" by Greenbereger and Padesky. Also "Rewire Your Anxious Brain."

Wow, awesome! If I get chosen I'd love this pet feeder for my kitty, or this shirt which is super cute, or this CBT therapy workbook. I can add more if you want lol, but hopefully you like one of those things!

I'm still pretty young, 27, but I've had social anxiety since as long as I can remember and I can say it has decreased significantly over time.

I don't attribute that to age though. I started educating myself about it in my late high school years and really started taking action on it college. Honestly, based on my understanding on anxiety, it probably won't go away if your constantly reinforcing it through your actions, such as avoiding social interactions to not have to experience the distress that comes with it. Not to mention, social ability comes with practice, children learn to socialize by doing it, so while it may seem awkward at first trying to jump back into it, it does get better with time if you persist.

If you haven't done so already, I'd highly recommend seeking therapy, specifically something like cognitive behavioral therapy, or at the very least something that includes an element of exposure. If something like that is cost prohibitive, I can suggest the book I followed when I went to therapy:

Managing Social Anxiety: A Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy Approach (Treatments That Work) https://www.amazon.com/dp/0195336690/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_jqXVzbGGY7KGB

If you can go to therapy though, I'd still recommend that just because I feel like having someone there to hold you accountable really helps.

Then don't try to learn from it, and accept that it is your brain and memory following faulty automatic processes and not your subconscience trying to teach you some sort of lesson. Look into Metacognitive therapy/detached mindfulness and similar methods that train you how to control your focus when the thoughts start bubbling up.

I was (an am!) a lot like that. People with ADHD have deficits in executive functioning skills. These are:

1. Analyze a task
   
   
2. Plan how to address the task
   
   
3. Organize the steps needed to carry out the task
   
   
4. Develop timelines for completing the task
   
   
5. Adjust or shift the steps, if needed, to complete the task
   
   
6. Complete the task in a timely way
   
   
   So let's see what happens when someone with executive functioning deficits try to preform a complex task.
   
   
7. Analysis is either skipped altogether (Our brains say, "bbbooooo-ring, amiright?!") or poorly analyzed.
   
8. Can you imagine trying to be successful when you can't make logical, well thought out plans? This mean we might not understand how many actual steps it is going to take to do a task, how long it is going to take, or predict any problems that might come up. Going into a game without a strategy is always a bad idea.
   
   
9. Suppose you could analyze the task and plan what to do. Even if you get that far, now you have to pay attention to details and organize the steps in a logical way. You need to be able to prioritize tasks, think about varying scenarios, and what you need to do to be ready. That's pretty intense.
   
   
10. Timeliness for task is difficult when you do not have a sense of time. Just like people have a sense of balance or weight, most people have a sense of time. Many ADHD people do NOT. They may be horrible at predicting how long a task will take or estimate how long they've spent on a step. We tend to wander and get lost, with no sense of urgency or concern for time.
    
    
11. Adjust the steps?! But, I wasn't prepared for that! My brain is going to explode! It was hard enough analyzing the steps the first time....now I have to start all over!?! (pretty typical automatic reaction from my brain)
    
    How can you help?
    
    

1. Identify your daughter's executive functioning strengths and weaknesses. She may be really good at a couple of those steps, and miserable at others. Utilizing her strengths can increase confidence and compensate partly for the other skills.
   
   
2. Lend her your brain. Her executive functioning skills are not there yet, but she can learn strategies to build them. In the meantime, you will need to support the parts that are hard for her while helping her to be as independent as possible.
   
   If planning is difficult, plan it out and write up a checklist for her to use.
   
   If it hard for her to complete tasks on time, use a visual timer or teach her how to use one in order to track time and understand how long activities should take.
   
   If she has trouble adjusting the task or trying a different way, then help prepare her mentally by talking to her about the possibility that something might be challenging and helping her come up with a strategy on how she will handle it if it does come up.
   
   As she practices these strategies with support and is successful, slowly shift those responsibilities to her to promote independence. You will spend less time being reactive (which makes her feel inadequate) and more time being proactive (which makes her feel empowered).
   
   Another important component is helping her take control over her anxiety. In addition to looking into cognitive-behavioral therapy, I highly recommend the book "Freeing Your Child from Anxiety." It is a CBT book written for parents to understand the biology of anxiety and a variety of strategies to teach coping skills and resilience. There are also a ton of great free worksheets online that help teach similar concepts. (The author also has Freeing Your Child from OCD, if you are interested)
   http://www.therapistaid.com/content/0087.pdf
   
   http://www.therapistaid.com/content/0081.pdf
   
   http://www.therapistaid.com/content/0047.pdf
   
   http://www.therapistaid.com/content/0073.pdf
   
   http://www.therapistaid.com/content/0004.pdf
   
   http://www.therapistaid.com/content/0069.pdf
   
   http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0804139806/ref=pd_lpo_sbs_dp_ss_2?pf_rd_p=1535523722&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=0767914929&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=02V5SHJGEN9RK93YRKD9
   
   And lastly, it might be helpful for you to sit down with her and practice making SMART goals and supporting her in following the plan.
   Specific
   Measureable
   Attainable
   Realistic
   Timely
   
   
   
   
   
   http://www.teacherspayteachers.com/Product/Goal-Setting-Form-1225523

I found a couple of books on this subject that I thought were useful for thinking about childhood anxiety (one of my girls is anxiety-prone). I wonder if one of these might give you enough background to assess whether what your daughter's therapist is doing is likely to help and if there's anything you could change about your own behavior that might help:

Growing Up Brave

Freeing Your Child From Anxiety

You have a very smart 4 year old who might be prone to anxiety. I have a 5 year old in therapy for a full-blown anxiety disorder, so let me share a couple of books that have made a big difference in how I relate to her when she's worrying too much about something.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1572245751/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o06_s01?ie=UTF8&psc=1

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0804139806/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o06_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Working through the programs in those books has really helped to improve my kid's ability to take risks and calm herself down when she's getting irrationally wound up.

I used to believe I had Aspergers until I read this book It's an excellent guide, and after I truly understood exactly what Asperger's is, what the diagnostic process entails, and such, I think it's clear that I don't have it, which was useful information to have as well.

Read this: http://www.amazon.de/The-Culture-Fear-Americans-Minorities/dp/0465003362

This is not just about fear, but also stress/anger/insecurity:

• Suicide has now actually surpassed car accidents as the number one cause of "injury death" in the United States.
  
  
• More U.S. soldiers killed themselves than were killed in combat last year.
  
  
• As I mentioned in another article, Americans will spend more than 280 billion dollars on prescription drugs during 2013.
  
  
• Nearly one out of every four women in the United States are taking antidepressants.
  
  
• The percentage of women taking antidepressants in the U.S. is higher than in any other country in the world.
  
  
• In 2010, the average teen in the U.S. was taking 1.2 central nervous system drugs. Those are the kinds of drugs which treat conditions such as ADHD and depression.
  
  
• Children in the United States are three times more likely to be prescribed antidepressants as children in Europe are.
  
  
• According to a recent article by David Kupelian, "one-third of the nation’s employees suffer chronic debilitating stress, and more than half of all 'millennials' (18 to 33 year olds) experience a level of stress that keeps them awake at night, including large numbers diagnosed with depression or anxiety disorder."
  
  
• Tens of millions of Americans use alcohol and drugs to numb the pain that they are experiencing. In the United States today, there are about 28 million Americans with a drinking problem and about 22 million Americans use illegal drugs.
  
  
• More people have been diagnosed with mental disorders in America than anywhere else on earth.
  
  
• There are also tens of millions of Americans that try to deal with anxiety and stress by eating. Of all the major industrialized nations, America is the most obese. Mexico is #2. (positions are now reversed)
  
  
• Back in 1962, only 13 percent of all Americans were obese. Today, approximately 36 percent of all Americans are obese.
  
  
• Many people try to escape from the pain of reality by getting lost in entertainment. Incredibly, the United States is tied with the UK for the highest average number of hours spent watching television each week.
  
  
• The United States has the highest divorce rate in the world by a good margin.
  
  
• The United States has the highest percentage of one person households on the entire planet.
  
  
• According to the Pew Research Center, only 51 percent of all American adults are currently married. Back in 1960, 72 percent of all adults in the United States were married.
  
  
• The United States has the highest child abuse death rate in the developed world.
  
  
• In the United States today, it is estimated that one out of every four girls is sexually abused before they become adults.
  
  
• The United States has the highest teen pregnancy rate in the world by a very wide margin.
  
  
• The United States produces more pornography than any other nation in the world.
  
  
• If you can believe it, there are 20 million new STD infections in the United States every single year.
  
  
• The U.S. has the highest STD infection rate in the entire industrialized world.
  
  
• It is estimated that about one out of every six Americans between the ages of 14 and 49 have genital herpes.
  
  
• Sadly, one out of every four teen girls in the U.S. has at least one sexually transmitted disease.
  
  
• The United States leads the world in eating disorder deaths.
  
  
• Nobody in the world gets more plastic surgery done than Americans do.
  
  
• Americans spend more time sitting in traffic than anyone else in the world.
  
  
• America has the highest incarceration rate and the largest total prison population in the entire world by a very wide margin.
  
  A good quote:
  
  > Fear is one of the primary things that motivates the American people, and that is a very powerful weapon that can be used against us. Just look at how the public votes, and what they say in polls. It's obvious that there's a ton of fear.
  
  http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2013-04-23/guest-post-america-1-fear-stress-anger-divorce-obesity-anti-depressants-etc
  

Awesome! I take it you're not seeing clients yet. I'm applying to internship this year (ugh!). I'm going to give you a reading list because I'm super biased about all this stuff. You have no obligation to read anything I suggest. I'm a contemporary behavior therapy person myself. (ACT, DBT, BA, FAP, MI).

Randomized trial of behavioral activation, cognitive therapy, and antidepressant medication in the acute treatment of adults with major depression. Lead author is Sona Dimidjian (2006) That builds off a Jacobson study (http://tinyurl.com/lb82qhj).

http://www.amazon.com/Guide-Functional-Analytic-Psychotherapy-Behaviorism/dp/0387097864 (this form of therapy could use any uncomfortable situations about your hand to become a therapeutic tool.)

http://www.amazon.com/ACT-Made-Simple-Easy---Read/dp/1572247053/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1377316771&sr=1-1&keywords=act+made+simple This is the biggest modern behavior therapy. It's based of relational frame theory (http://www.amazon.com/Learning-RFT-Introduction-Relational-Application/dp/1572249064/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1377316825&sr=1-1&keywords=learning+rft)

Last book I'll recommend is the main DBT book. (http://www.amazon.com/Cognitive-Behavioral-Treatment-Borderline-Personality-Disorder/dp/0898621836)

For sure read the first two articles. They're super important. The rest is just the stuff I'm interested in because I'm biased. Let me know if you ever want to nerd out about the behavioral side of CBT.