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u/neomancr · 2 pointsr/Braincels

Daoism and zen Buddhism helped me a lot.

Don't dismiss this as new age woo, it's whatever you make of it.

Zen creates a mind set that places you beyond yourself, and from there you can become your own puppet master.

Zen keys by Thich Nhat Hanh is really good.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0385475616/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1521050527&sr=1-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=Zen+keys

Besides that I think it's just really important to have the courage to be your own advocate. No one else but you will always be there for you as bleak as that sounds.

You have to begin seeing yourself as your own magnum opus. Your self is your ultimate creation that you continue to develop and refine and all other things extend from that.

Plato likened a person to a republic in the sense that you can be a master of the self or a slave of the self.

When you sprint at max speed your strength is dragging your weakness along. If you keep doing that you'll unify yourself more and more.

If you want the second slice of cake, you mind says no, but the body says yes.

It's that sort of a thing.

Have faith in yourself that you can be as great as you can imagine yourself to be, and any doubt you have is just the lesser man inside of you trying to snuff out the greater man.

All this talk of cope is really toxic because it is blatantly playing on your weaknesses.

I read a lot of philosophy books and random stuff that I thought could be useful. A really powerful book for me was les miserables.

That was referred to by Hugo as his religious masterpiece, only its a view of Christianity that was overriden by fundamentalism. It's Christianity as a philosophy or even better said, the science of subjectivity. There is nothing supernatural but it demonstrates how there is no need.

If you want me to break down the plot I can but I don't wanna ruin it, but it's basically a perspective on spirituality where you realize what's "true" doesn't really matter.

A person who believes something makes it real.

The subjective world is entirely our own creation.

Beyond that I'd say just read everything you're interested in and process it on two different levels.

There is the message of the author, and then a meta analysis where it's essentially just a thought exercise. You can actually learn way more than even the author intended that way and it puts you in a mindset where you are in control of how it shapes you.

u/mischiffmaker · 2 pointsr/Braincels

Your assumption that everyone is on the take is just wrong. I've lived a long time, met a lot of people in a variety of locations, and the one thing I can tell you for sure is that there are many more good, kind, helpful people of both genders (or all), than bad. Most people just want to get along in their lives, and understand the golden rule, "Treat others how you wish to be treated by them."

The thing is, people live up to our expectations. If you expect people to lie, cheat, steal, those are the people you'll notice and gravitate towards. If you expect them to be decent people who will help if asked--and who will often volunteer without being asked--you'll notice those people.

Yes, people make mistakes. We sometimes mistake our own intentions, or come across situations that change our minds about other people, but that's part of life, which will never quite follow the life scripts I mentioned. And yes, there are those who will use anyone and everyone--but you know them by their actions, not their words. 'Trust, but verify' might be a better approach than 'mistrust everyone.'

This may sound counter-intuitive, but I was once in a relationship I had a hard time letting go of after it ended. I spent my fair share of time wallowing, but eventually knew I had to let go and move on. A book I found, "How to fall out of love," has simple cognitive behavioral exercises that helped me identify and change my own negative thought patterns.

The reverse side of that, of course, is that there are also simple exercises that help you make better choices in pursuing the next relationship. (Google 'cognitive behavioral therapy' for a broader view.)

No one's perfect. We all struggle, even those labelled as 'normies' and 'Chads'--you just haven't seen their struggles because you're focused on your own, and it's easier for you to think, naturally enough, that their life is just easy. It isn't, though.

That's why you got such a kind response from /u/ceDrowRanger. She recognizes that life is hard and you're struggling too.

Good luck to you!

u/wont_tell_i_refuse_ · 6 pointsr/Braincels

Great quote. Orwell was a commie but he was redpilled on most social issues. One of the few honest men. I have a fantastic book of all his essays in chronological order https://www.amazon.com/Essays-Everymans-Library-Contemporary-Classics/dp/0375415033 Really worth it

u/IWillBecomeChad · 15 pointsr/Braincels

I recently finished an excellent book called "Thank you for Arguing" (full-title: "Thank You for Arguing: What Aristotle, Lincoln, and Homer Simpson Can Teach Us About the Art of Persuasion").

From the book, I realized that women use high level rhetorical techniques to get what they want at a much higher rate than men.

Often times, they are full of sht, but they know how to play their cards right to get what they want by saying things like "Height doesn't matter!", "I don't like muscular men, gross!", "I wouldn't care if my boyfriend made less money than I did.". They say things like this all the time, but by and large, they don't really mean them and follow through on them irl.

Put on your [
They Live*](https://imgur.com/gallery/hY3Ro) glasses and realize that women are, as they say, full of shit, and they're very good at getting away with it. This also explains this post. Women with crap-tier genetics still pass them on because they manage to influence chads into impregnating them, then passing on their short height to their sons (interestingly, short women aren't considered as attractive in the Germanic / Nordic countries as they are here in the US, and that explains why they have significantly higher average heights than us in the US).

u/dullsite · 1 pointr/Braincels

You asked for it:

1/4 gay men in America have had over 1000 sex partners. Source: http://www.amazon.com/Homosexualities-Study-Diversity-Among-Women/dp/0671251503

43% of gay men have over 500 partners. Source: http://www.amazon.com/Homosexualities-Study-Diversity-Among-Women/dp/0671251503

10 to 15 percent of older homosexuals have more than 1000 sex partners. Source: http://www.jstor.org/stable/3813477

79% of homosexual men say over half of their sex partners are strangers. Source: http://www.amazon.com/Unequal-Opportunity-Disparities-Affecting-Bisexual/dp/0195301536


In Australia, 25% of homosexuals have had more than 100 sex partners. Source: http://takimag.com/article/the_straight_dope_on_homosexuality_elizabeth_mccaw/print


Monogamy is not a central feature of most homosexual relationships. Source: http://takimag.com/article/the_straight_dope_on_homosexuality_elizabeth_mccaw/print

Married homosexual men are 50% more likely than straight couples to divorce. Source: http://takimag.com/article/the_straight_dope_on_homosexuality_elizabeth_mccaw/print

In the Netherlands, the average homosexual in a “steady relationship” has seven to eight affairs per year. Source: http://takimag.com/article/the_straight_dope_on_homosexuality_elizabeth_mccaw/print

Over 20% of older homosexuals have had more than 500 different sex partners. Source: https://archive.li/cr4QD

The average gay man has several dozen sex partners per year. Source: https://archive.li/cr4QD

28% of homosexuals have had sex with over a thousand men. For straight men? Just 25% have had sex with more than 10 women. Source: https://archive.li/cr4QD

Most “long term relationships” between gay men last less than eight years. Source: https://archive.li/cr4QD

Among gay Canadian men in “committed relationships, only 25% were monogamous. Source: https://archive.li/cr4QD

In one study, only 9% of gay men were monogamous. Source: https://archive.li/cr4QD

75% of straight men an are faithful, compared to just 4.5% of gay men. Source: https://archive.li/cr4QD

In Berlin, 83% of gay men in “steady” relationships had had frequent affairs in the last year. Source: https://archive.li/cr4QD

u/fschmidt · 1 pointr/Braincels

What is Etology?

I read some science fiction. The good science fiction from the West is from the past, of course, since Western culture is no longer capable of producing anything good. But this recent Chinese book isn't bad: The Three-Body Problem

"The Selfish Gene" is a good book, written before Dawkins went insane. I referred to it in this post of mine:

http://www.mikraite.org/Human-Evolution-tp17.html

u/Deoxysxx · 2 pointsr/Braincels

There are some things that work outside the scope of evolution/natural selection. I recommend everyone to read 'The Evolution of Beauty.'

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3391426/

https://www.theverge.com/2017/5/19/15659294/richard-prum-evolution-beauty-biology-darwin-interview

Those two links above are also worth reading.

u/_SnNNeKerz · 4 pointsr/Braincels

Here


The results had a p<0.05 so they are statistically significant.



The study has a citation index of 90 so it's been peer-reviewed.









Related links:






https://www.amazon.com/Blindsight-Peter-Watts/dp/0765319640



https://thebrainbank.scienceblog.com/2015/10/10/whats-going-on-in-your-head-the-science-behind-our-inner-voice/

u/StopCopingStartLDAR · 36 pointsr/Braincels

>be born without consent

required reading for depressedcels

u/sponge_bob91 · 2 pointsr/Braincels

> blind and stupid.

So, successful guys tell incels again and again it's possible to get women, attractive guys talk about having a hard time with women (often because emphasis is put on their looks and this is where their confidence stems from rather than personal attributes) and most statistical evidence points to the facts looks have little to no impact on women's sexual/dating decisions yet, I'm the one that's blind and stupid? Don't think so.

u/Here2Crit · 1 pointr/Braincels

> actually falling for "women are pure, they want to cuddle not fuck" meme

BAD INCEL, CUCK IQ


>Book of leftist journalist Daniel Bergner summarizes the work of a series of sexologists studies on humans & similar animals & tops it with personal anecdotes which conclude that "women want sex just as much as men do, and that sexual drive is mostly NOT sustained by emotional intimacy and safety." Bergner's research suggests that women's sexual craving makes them even less well-suited for monogamy than men.

https://www.amazon.com/What-Do-Women-Want-Adventures/dp/0061906085

>From American Psychological Association, "men significantly underestimate women's sexual desires especially in relationships"

http://psycnet.apa.org/record/2016-22171-006

> "When reporting sex, men & women disgaree on what constitutes sex… women do not consider fellatio, cunnilingus, and manual stimulation of a partner's genitals, whereas men did". Another BlackPill truth. When asking women about previous sex, multiply it by 3 and keep in mind they only count vaginal (and maybe anal)

Proof that women only have desire for Chad whereas cuck men suffer from lacking sex
> husbands want a 50% increase in sex whereas wives are satisfied

> Nearly 30% of the unfaithful husbands had multiple extramarital partners, compared to only 5% of the unfaithful wives. (sex is for chad whereas chads fuck anyone)

> People who were in a committed relationship who want to have sex but aren't having sex, consisted almost entirely of men & only 2% of women reported that issue

> "Among 20-year-olds who aren't in a committed relationship or dating for less than 2 years found no noticeable gender difference in sexual desire." To me, that says women got bored of fucking a man, needs to ride the cock carrousel.

Study at http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1207/S15327957PSPR0503_5

u/CRUZDIDNOTHINGWRONG · 1 pointr/Braincels

https://www.amazon.com/Natural-History-Rape-Biological-Coercion/dp/0262700832

Your argument was that rape is not natural in mammals with higher order brain functions. You should provide evidence to support your claim. I have provided evidence for my original claim.

u/The_Sloth_Racer · 1 pointr/Braincels

> And found that even in my best shape I was still utterly unattractive to all women and repulsive to most.

If you were jacked, had muscles, were not overweight, and women STILL avoided you, that means it's your personality, not your physical appearance.

> I've been to male therapists as well - if anything, they were even worse.

Why were they worse?

Just because you had bad experiences with certain therapists, doesn't mean they're all like that. It can take a while to find one that you click with. Like I said, I had to see probably 20 different therapists before I found one that I clicked with and that actually helped me.

> Because those suggestions have already been tried. And you dismiss that fact when presented with it, because yeah, you're not here to help - you're here to dispense advice, regardless of how helpful it is.

Every person is not the same. Just because something didn't help you, doesn't mean it won't help others. You also can't say therapy didn't work for you when you haven't tried all the different kinds of therapy or seen specialist therapists. I can promise you that every single 'incel' on your sub has not tried every single suggestion out there so to say that things like DBT therapy won't help others is just complete BS. I also suggested TMS and I bet you haven't tried it and most incels haven't tried it so you can't discount things you haven't even tried. To act like there's no hope or treatment for incels is just wrong and sends the wrong message to other 'incels' out there.

> This is the loop of advice you're presenting to incels. It's neither helpful nor supportive.

Telling people they should try different things to try to get better IS helpful and supportive. Telling people that they're ugly and they'll be alone forever is NOT helpful or supportive and that's what many incels say.

> You get pissed either way.

I'm not pissed but many people do get pissed when they try to offer support and help and get told they don't know anything because they're 'normies' or get attacked.

> Incels are hostile to your kind exactly because they have extensive experience with your advice - they know your advice doesn't work and they know you turn hostile the moment your advice is rejected.

First, stop trying to separate yourself from others. Don't say "your kind," we're all people. By acting like you're different, you separate yourself even more and just get more depressed which is a vicious cycle.

Have you ever heard the saying "fake it 'til you make it"? It would apply to incels as well. Pretend like you're a normal dude that is open for love and eventually you will be.

I suggested DBT therapy and TMS, neither of which have been tried by the majority of 'incels' on here so you can't say things don't work when you haven't tried them. You also can't say things don't work when you have no idea how another person will respond to the treatment. The vast majority of people have never even heard of TMS because it's a relatively new treatment that hasn't even been around for 10 years and is just starting to be available across the US and the world. ECT may be helpful if nothing else works. Stop dismissing treatments that you've never tried.

> Basically, they know you're terrible people who pretend to want to help but instead are just here to abuse and troll. If you act like an abusive person, you're going to be treated like one.

Yeah, OK, we're terrible people for trying to help you. /s Do you realize how hypocritical you sound by judging everyone like that when you don't want to be judged yourself? I can promise you, I'm not a terrible person. I have a problem caring too much most times and that's the only reason I even came here in the first place. Making a stupid statement like saying everyone that's not an incel is a terrible person is not only wrong but it just continues to keep you separated. I also haven't been abusive to anyone on here so that's another false statement. Have you ever thought that maybe other people aren't the problem?

> Find instances of DBT benefiting incels in some way directly related to their incelhood.

How exactly would I find that when most people have no idea what an incel is? 'Incel' is not a well-known term so how would there be scientific data to show that therapy helps incels? There is plenty of data showing therapy helps people with a variety of issues, especially with depression, which is what most incels have. Maybe CBT (talk therapy) didn't work for you but it could help others and other types of therapy like DBT could even be more beneficial than CBT. I also mentioned trying TMS which helps to "rewire" the brain and you haven't tried that either so you can't discount it. ECT could be tried if nothing else has worked.

> This is a big problem with people like you.

Again, you're alienating yourself. You're also being a hypocrite. You say you want to be treated like everyone else but when you act like that and tell us we're different and we're "terrible people", you just make it worse for yourself and alienate yourself further.

> When someone tries to engage you in conversation and maybe ACTUALLY work out some solutions that might help incels

What solutions do you have? I'm not trying to be sarcastic, I actually want to know.

All I see on your sub is 'incels' being hopeless and thinking they'll be single for the rest of their lives and they start to hate women and the entire world. Many blast women as 'sluts' and act like women are less than men. Many say they want to kill or hurt 'normies.' The anger towards women and society just makes your situation worse and makes it less likely to ever find love.

> instead of doing your part in the conversation you treat it like a shouting contest - instead of arguing your points, you simply restate in more words, which really is the internet equivalent of trying to shout as loud as you can.

I'm not shouting about anything. I was trying to offer suggestions to possibly help.

> You're not going to convince or help anyone that way, so if either is your goal, you need to reconsider your approach.

I guess I was just stupid to think you wanted help. You can't help people that won't help themselves. If you wanted help and wanted to change, you would be willing to try different things and not just give up on life/love and say nothing works.

If I had thought like you did, I would have committed suicide a long time ago. I have suffered from severe depression and other mental health issues and it took me a while but I finally started to get better. I had to try different things for years and see countless doctors and finally started to get help and get better.

This is the bad attitude that I was talking about before. People don't want to be around negative people so as long as you have that negative attitude and act like you're separate from everyone else, you'll only attract other negative people. No one wants a friend that's so depressed all the time and thinks they can't change. Get some help so you can change your attitude and you'll start attracting positive people.

EDIT: I found this page from a book called 'The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life' by Mark Manson and I think it may help you and other 'incels' and just about anyone who is depressed or anxious. You (and every other incel) should read the book. You can download it and read for free online or in .PDF, .epub, or .mobi format here or you can find it on Amazon here. You should also check out the author, Mark Manson's website.

u/corinarh · 4 pointsr/Braincels

COPE, french women fucked nazis (and married them) and then after they lost they fucked americans (and also married them).

Yeah some were raped but a lot of them wanted to have sex and marry victorious chads.


EDIT:
WW2:
Italy
During the campaign of 1943-1945, there were more than 10,000 marriages between Italian women and American soldiers

French - can't find source how many there are two books about American-French marriage

https://www.amazon.com/French-War-Brides-Mademoiselle-American/dp/0984004335/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1507726255&sr=8-2&keywords=hilary+kaiser

https://www.amazon.com/WWII-Voices-American-French-Married/dp/1475285884/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1507726255&sr=8-1&keywords=hilary+kaiser

Korean War
6,423 Korean women married U.S. military personnel as war brides during and immediately after the Korean War.

Vietnam War
8,040 Vietnamese women came to the United States as war brides between 1964 and 1975.[24]