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Just make a better sploof!

(reposting this from another of my comments)

Guide to the ultimate sploof

Get a regular gatorade bottle or similar, paper towels, a stabby tool to make holes in the bottom (I used the proper tool for the job actually, a 1/4" drill bit+drill, but an awl or a hot screwdriver will do fine), and some Activated Carbon (fixed wrong link) (also sold at pet stores/walmart pet section everywhere; that can will make at least 5 of these...)

First, poke holes in the bottom of the bottle, go nuts, more flow the better. I made 6 ~1/4" holes, more smaller ones would work fine, but bigger ones flow better.
Next, stuff a bunch of paper towels filling the bottom to about halfway up, making sure to block all the holes with it so none of the carbon could escape.
Once you have a good layer of paper towel, pour in a 1.5-2 inch thick layer of carbon and shake it lightly so it's even.
Now plug the top of it with more paper towel so none can get out the top, you want to make it so th carbon isn't loose and stays as a packed layer, so that all the smoke must flow through it. Now you're done!

It should flow through easily so you can blow out hits easy, and the activated carbon will absorb the smoke & smell! Eventually, it won't be working as well (like 2-3 or more months), and you will have to replace the carbon in it (I recommend replacing the top paper towels more often, as they get really moist from your breath.) I'd just make a new sploof at this point instead of pulling it apart.

This is a DIY version of the smokebuddy

You have to worry about smoke coming from whatever you're smoking from as well, and a good fan setup helps a lot. Also consider a vape if smell is always a major concern, you'll love being able to relax and vape.

Basic info:

Ask your friend if they can hook you up with the person they buy from. The quantities you can buy from smallest to largest: 1/8th, 1/4th, 1/2, 1 ounce. Some dealers will sell by the gram, too, but I haven't bought from anybody who deals in amounts that small in a long time. In a lot of cases your friend will end up becoming your middle man because a lot of dealers only like to do business with people they know they can trust. I've been smoking regularly for about 4 years now and I've only ever dealt with one dealer directly because he was dating my friend.

If you still live with your parents a pipe will probably be the easiest vessel to smoke out of. They are easy to conceal, but more effective than joints or blunts. Hit up any local smoke shop or head shop, but there is a little bit of etiquette required at these places. Never refer to what you're buying as a bowl or a bong (if that's what you're going for). Call it a pipe or a water pipe and do not mention marijuana at all. They know what it's for, but they won't say it either. I have seen kids get kicked out of headshops on the spot for making this mistake. If it is a legit shop they can't sell to you if you give them the impression that you are going to use their items for illegal things. Law enforcement routinely tests these places to make sure they aren't violating any laws.

Learning how to roll is a great skill, but not everybody is good at it. I personally suck at rolling so I bought a cigarette roller and it gets the job done.

actually it's a smidgen or dash measuring spoon for dosage and all plus if you have a nice metal one it's easy to scoop because it's thinner than plastic/a shell ;)

That being said, I give you props for creativity, it's a perfectly good solution.

http://smile.amazon.com/Pinch-Dash-Smidgen-Measuring-Spoons/dp/B000E8OPVS

No, Those beads aren't going to do the trick. I use these in my 20'' Straight Tube beaker Grav Lab's I own. They are really easy to get started. I put them in a pot (lol) of water and in about six hours they where full sized balls. They are biodegradable and really easy to clean. They also keep my piece 40-60% cleaner ( And I dont even use an ash catcher) One of the best buys for my piece. I'm very satisfied plus its cool to show off to people who have never seen them. Hope this helps!

I prefer not to smoke outside especially at an apartment complex. If smell is the only issue consider buying a Smoke Buddy to smoke in your apartment. It eliminates all smell and no smoke comes out the other end! It surprised me how well it worked the first time I used one.

Smoke Buddy 0159-BLU Personal Air Filter, Blue https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00478UIB2/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_puBQBbRSYSNHT

Or for much cheaper you can make yourself a sploof which is just an empty roll of toilet paper / paper towels with some dryer sheets stuffed inside. It doesn’t completely get rid of the smoke so it can stain the inside walls of your new apartment like regular weed use. From my experience it works just as well as the smoke buddy just looks a little janky when compared.

http://www.weedist.com/2012/12/how-to-make-a-sploof/

🌳🌳🌳 Best of luck!! 🌳🌳🌳

This is the best part about abv. Just find a way to ingest and you're good to go. I've found that abv recipes aren't as tasty as typical edibles so I actually bought these and make little abv pills. Works like a charm!

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B000ACUJRW?pc_redir=1406024329&robot_redir=1

I had a pretty effective method that I used in the dorms two years ago. The main thing you need to focus on when smoking in a dorm room is airflow. You want to create negative air pressure in your room ie have more air leaving your room than entering it. This will keep the smoke going out the window, rather than into the hallway.

To do this you will need 3 things:

• a towel to put at the foot of your door
  
• a fan in the window blowing air from your room to outside
  
• This foam which you will put around the edges of your door. This will prevent air leaking through the cracks around your door.
  
  Once you have setup the negative pressure, you want to test your setup by holding a lighter around the edges of the door. If you have set your room up properly the flame should either not move, or blow sightly inside your room. If the flame is attracted to the cracks around the door then your setup is not working and you need to fix that before lighting up.
  
  
  After that the next thing to consider is the type of piece you will be using to smoke. You will want to use glass or a vape. Never smoke a joint or a blunt in your room! You want to take smaller hits to prevent your bowl from cherrying. The idea is to have as little smoke in your room as possible. I would usually cover the bowl with my hand after my hits to prevent a cherry. Then just exhale through a sploof (paper towel roll with dryer sheets) into the fan.
  
  
  Hope this is helpful, this method got me through my freshman year with no trouble whatsoever. Make sure you don't open your door until your room has aired out, which is usually pretty quick if you follow the steps I outlined above.

I usually bend out a long drapery hook like these. Can easily clean it off by heating them up with a lighter and then just wiping it off.

Looks like this. Usually use hook end to scoop and pin end to do an intial cleaning of my bubbler or just clear the downstem.

I use a brown beer bottle with one of those vacuum wine corks. My cork is lame and doesn't hold a vacuum very long, but it completely seals the odor. The brown glass protects against sun damage. It also protects a little against casual observation. If you had a good cork that holds a vacuum like they're supposed to, it would also protect against oxidation, since that's the whole point of their existence.

Black Ice scented Car Freshner
(only BLACK ICE, the others won't work the same)

Roll around for about 5 minutes with all windows down. Open one of these lil trees all the way on a sunny day. Roll up all windows and park in a sunny spot. Let that bake into your car. Good to grow.

Repeat when you notice the smell fading back to sweet dank

http://www.amazon.com/Air-Freshener-Black-Ice-Pack/dp/B0006O2PBW

I agree, but I feel having a reasonable solution to offer would help. Recommend your neighbor use a wood pipe with a hinge lid and a SmokeBuddy carbon filter. Just these two steps should eliminate enough smell to keep it from seeping over into the apartment.

Two more door pro-tips:

Use foam tape like this to seal the gap between the door and doorframe.

This, combined with a draft sock will keep the dank vapors on the correct side of the door.

Bonus benefit: helps keep weird odors & noises out of your space.

How long is your commute from home? not enough time for the trip there prep and get to the testing facility?

I dont know about the timing from frozen to 90 degrees you might want to test the timing of it with just some water or something if that is your plan.

I've seen travel mugs that are heated and have a 12v plug for your car. Could possibly drop the frozen urine in a warm water bath in one of those mugs on the way over to the testing facility.

Edit: Did some googling and found one on amazon with a temperature readout and temp control!!! actually seems perfect imo.

https://www.amazon.com/Tech-Tools-Temperature-Control-Adapter/dp/B000EY5CGO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1540106146&sr=8-3&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=heated+mug+car&dpPl=1&dpID=41viIso9xDL&ref=plSrch

Get a SmokeBuddy. Well worth the money. I use the tiny bonus one for travel too. https://www.amazon.com/Smoke-Buddy-Personal-Filter-Blue/dp/B00478UIB2

gotta microwave? Or a toaster oven? Maybe do some fire crackers?

also, the smoke buddy is a pretty awesome little invention. If you choose to go this route I would suggest buying a one hitter or only packing one hit bowls from now on so that you don't have any cherries from your bowl still goin.

or order 500 perfect filter tips (or 1000 if you halve them like i do) for less than $5
http://www.amazon.com/Rolling-Papers-Filter-Booklets-Standard/dp/B005JFFY02/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1377472640&sr=8-1&keywords=500+filter+tips

Buy a smoke buddy, pack bowl with one hit worth of weed, smoke all of that, breath all of it through smoke buddy. Zero smoke in the air. Been smoking like that for years.

You've got to figure out how to really eye how much you can take in one hit without coughing.

https://www.amazon.com/Smoke-Buddy-Personal-Filter-Blue/dp/B00478UIB2

Index cards are still bleached and covered in ink. Here's some real, safe crutches that are probably cheaper than your index cards and will also last forever. I don't get why people go through so much trouble to replace something that costs 1 penny per use and can effect our health.

Tightvac. You can find them on Amazon ranging from 1oz to 6 oz

http://www.amazon.com/Fox-Run-Brands-Vinegar-Bubbles/dp/B0000DHR2R/ref=sr_1_22?s=kitchen&ie=UTF8&qid=1347240214&sr=1-22

http://www.amazon.com/Norpro-792-Vinegar-Cruets-2-Piece/dp/B000ST1B24/ref=sr_1_11?s=kitchen&ie=UTF8&qid=1347240214&sr=1-11

http://www.amazon.com/Oil-Vinegar-Cruet-with-Spritzer/dp/B0013V5IAM

take your pick!

Crystal Meth Menthol Crystals

You can buy the smoke buddy on the UK amazon...someone posted this link above.

Smoke Buddy and Ozium will eliminate all odor. Have you tried using a vaporizer?
The odor is minimal and when used with a Smoke Buddy and Ozium, you can vape within your apartment with closed windows and nobody will smell anything.

Edit: Here is a graphical representation

http://www.amazon.com/Black-Magic-Waterpipe-Diffuser-Beads/dp/B007HC5QMG/ref=pd_sim_sbs_misc_2 :D also glass screens are a must have http://www.amazon.com/Glass-Screen-Daisy-Assorted-Colors/dp/B004OAO4A4/ref=pd_sbs_misc_5

Raw Tips

> 6oz vacuum seal container

this?

Joint rolling machine
http://www.amazon.com/Zig-Zag-Roller-Perfect-Cigarettes/dp/B001GPJY64

We get these guys at work, nylon probe tool/spudger/black stick. I just take em home and use them for all kinds of things. You can get them online too.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TOFFNQ?psc=1

Here is the desktop version of your link

http://www.amazon.com/Menthol-Crystals-100%25-Natural-Greenals/dp/B003SAB3VY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1367713880&sr=8-1&keywords=menthol+crystals


Too lazy to tinyurl sorry. This is only for a qp but for the price you can't beat it

Haha my bad man, [here ya go!](Tightvac - 1 oz to 6 ounce Airtight Multi-Use Vacuum Seal Portable Storage Container for Dry Goods, Food, and Herbs - Black Cap & Body https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0049557HI/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_MbGGAbZZVDJF9)

There's some different designs too depending on whatcha lookin for!

Insanity wolf says, "Liquid Ass!"