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So my guess is that it's less of a physical appearance matter and more of a personality/attitude thing. Such as the beach for example, instead of asking who wants to go to the beach, make it more definite. You're going to the beach, who wants to come along? You need to give off the air that while you would like everyone's company, you don't need it. THEY'RE the ones who should feel privileged to be around you, not the other way around. As for the getting things example, I assume you always go up and get it? It's one thing to be the helpful guy people appreciate, another to be the carpet they walk on. If they ask you to get something, give them a little crap for asking, then another time ask them to make it up to you. Perhaps "Alright fine I'll get the beer, but you owe me pizza later" And actually get them to get the pizza.

As for the body, it sounds like you lack some confidence due to being skinny. While skinny men can be Alpha and imposing, perhaps you should work out more so YOU feel imposing.

But basically what it boils down to is that it feels like you don't have the most confidence and get dejected when people don't go with you to the point of being a bit submissive. Fake it till you've got it, just pretend that you're confident and things should be the way they are, and eventually it'll actually work out that way. Read some of the links on here, plus I highly recommend looking at The Art of Manliness for more ideas. Most important is to just go out and try things out, reading can only take you so far, and failing is not failure, it's a learning experience.

Also here's some advice I gave earlier which might help:

>For your hair post in /r/malehairadvice for a style that fits you, they're going to want full body pics with outfit. As for fashion, post in /r/malefashionadvice for some help based on your figure and body stature. If you truly want a progression to give you some guidance, consdier The Art of Manliness' 30 Days to a Better Man (also just a damn good manly blog.

>If you want to change how you look physically, hit the gym, use /r/Fitness to help develop a routine. With a diet and regular exercise within a year you'll look completely different.

>Now we've hit the physical attributes of being more manly, for the more mental ones that's harder. They will develop as you come to appreciate your body more, but it's a mindset more than anything. If you pretend confidence long enough you have it eventually. When someone tells you you're like an annoying little brother, ask why, figure out what personality traits these are and change them. I highly recommend finding some inspirational figure to model your life on, for me personally it's Theodore Roosevelt, Edmund Morris's biographical trilogy is FANTASTIC. At least read the first book, Roosevelt had to overcome much greater hurdles than you, you can do the same. Don't be afraid to ask questions and figure out why people think you are the way you are, just be sure to change it. If you need motivation, /r/GetMotivated is there for you. Further let this move into other areas of your life, work hard and play hard.

>I'm going to strongly encourage you to read some articles on Art of Manliness, it's not 100% perfect, but a great site for men.

>Edit: Oh and I know it's too late for you to do this now, but one of the most attractive qualities I've been told by women is that I'm an Eagle Scout. Reasoning behind this is that it says that I embody certain aspects, namely the Scout Law and Scout Oath (as well as the Slogan and Motto). You can still live up to these ideals without being an Eagle Scout, just start now, they really are very manly.

Easily the best resource I can recommend from own experience, changed my life:

Models by Mark Manson

Buy it. Read it. Get out there. I agree with the other comments, it starts within. You need to grasp who you are as a person from within and BE different from everyone else. Forget the random attractive girls, you need to explore things that make you who you are and find the demographic of women that would be most compatible. If you like to play video games and occasionally play pick up ultimate the girl in the ugg boots and yoga pants at Starbucks ordering a Venti Double whip chai mocha latte is NOT for you. First step toward finding the right girl is figuring out what YOU like to do and enjoy YOUR own activities first and foremost. A girl should be as interested in you as you are in her, you do you and invite them to SHARE experiences in YOUR life. Not become a PART of it or be put on a PEDESTAL.

Yeah, I've done hundreds of approaches, and my recommendation to newbies is always the same: The Rules of the Game. I'm assuming you've read The Game first, of course. It'll will start you off slow and easy with important foundational material you won't see elsewhere and teach you everything important you need to know to begin in a coherent 30 day system. To use philosarapter's baseball analogy, you could go out and just start swinging for balls (which is extremely frustrating) or you could pick up a book that teaches the fundamentals of baseball; stance, grip, keep your eye on the ball, etc. This is that book. Of course, nothing beats having a great coach but they are extremely expensive and really only good once you've got the basics down. Naturally, you'll want to get on a team and actually play soon enough, and that's where you want to join up with a Lair and find some good wingmen. But yeah, start with Rules of the Game.

Sounds to me like you're sorta basing your happiness on external factors. Learn to just enjoy yourself. Every time you meet a girl don't think about your ex, and don't think about the potential LTR/f-close yet (I'm assuming you're game isnt very good because of that 7 year relationship). Everyone is special (in some way at least) and try to find that in her, might help. Or just man up and start sarging till you get over this ;)

Read Intimate Connections by David Burns (here) it'll help a lot. If you can't afford it or its not at a local library, you can find the pdf easily enough.

Ok so it sounds like looks aren't your strong suit. Working out is a good idea but bottom line - if you're 5'5 you aren't the guy that girls are just going to notice based on looks. Also, shave your head if you haven't already. Then you don't look bald. You look like a guy with a shaved head.

So clearly looks aren't your strongest suit, but your talking and social skills are. By not talking to women and waiting for them to show interest based on your looks, you are keeping your strong suit hidden and relying on your weaker aspect.

Now you might not think you have good social skills except when you are in the zone but here's the truth. Your "zone" is just experiencing a lack of anxiety. What you experience most of the time is social anxiety. That's why you are in your head.

The way you can deal with your anxiety about talking to women is through exposure (talk to lots of women) and read up on how to deal with the anxiety. This book is good: http://www.amazon.com/Control-Your-Anxiety-Before-Controls/dp/0806521368/ref=asap_bc?ie=UTF8

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson

Models by Mark Manson

Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You by Susan J. Elliott

Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: Practical Guide for Improving Communication by John Gray

No More Mr. Nice Guy by Robert Glover

I'd recommend checking out Mark Manson's website. There's some great stuff there for subscribers.

The Game is more for entertainment than information. You won't learn much more than you already know by reading it.

I would focus on conversation threading. You can find numerous more articles by using the search bar.

If you want a more of a "guide." I've been told this is pretty good. (I haven't used it though.)

I'm currently reading "The Mystery Method" it's widely considered one of the foundation of the PUA community. So that would also be a good place to start.

Also read the sidebar stuff in /r/seduction

EDIT: Forget about IOIs they are bs and just distract you from your game and being present in the moment. Always Assume Attraction you have no idea how much this will help you.

You just asked how to interact with an attractive woman. That's a very broad question. Read the side bar, read Models by Mark Manson, read The Rational Male.

If I had to summarize seduction in one phrase: be outcome independent, but be interested.

If you're interested in having a serious conversation. I'm willing to talk.


My stance:
Negging and the number system are fine. I have no problems with them. First: The number system [this is the whole attractive 1-10 scale]. Its not an evaluation of how much the person is worth. Its how attractive are they to you. Women do this and men do this. They have different reasons for doing this. Claiming that it's a crappy thing to do is disingenuous to yourself and who you talk to. If you don't use a number system, you still compare others. The other benefit [and why pua uses] to the number system is that its easy to describe to others without going into the appearence details or personal identifiers of the girls online. As the community, we're not interested in identifying the person. We're interested in the interaction.

Negging: Its teasing. It's not a compliment and it's not an insult.

From a lot of feminists that I"ve read their arguments, their opposition tends to stem from extreme situations or the lack of social IQ. When you go for a kiss with a girl, both parties don't confirm that the action that is going to take place is going to happen.

In a perfect world:

It would be easy to get to know the opposite sex and come to a mutual agreement about what each other want. However, games are played. Girls, in general, are playing a game that the guys aren't aware of. However, guys are thrown into the game and are expected to play well. I am of the opinion of lets stop playing games and have a bit of fun together. Everyone could be direct and clear about what they want and don't want. However this is not the case in the real world.


Marketing

When PUA information is sold, it is typically sold by marketers. They're going for what appeals to a base desire of the demographic (guys), sex. Guys want to be able to communicate what they want without the negative reprocutions that have been getting worse. [There are women out there that want to ruin a guy's reputation for hitting on her or just wanting sex. Thats screwed up, but again... some women] I think there is a lot of bad marketing out there. I'm referring to the types "have sex with any girl you want." A lot of the fear about the pickup guides/classes/bootcamps comes from the same fears about hypnotism... its "forcing people to do what they don't want to do." You cannot make any girl, without the threat of violence or coercion, have sex with you if they don't want to. Where am I going with this: Seduction/game requires that you learn how to be your best self, be aware of the situation, and to become very approachable to the opposite sex. From the perspective of strategy, coercion and violence is a very bad idea and it would limit your opportunities. Seduction/game: We want to meet agreeable people, and to have fun with others.


How men are treated

I think something that should be address is how men are treated in modern society. As a man, you're not given a lot of opportunity to be social, or to be apart of a community unless you really work for it. Norah Vincennt might be able to explain this point a bit better: http://www.amazon.com/Self-Made-Man-Womans-Year-Disguised/dp/0143038702
[However, after the experiement she found her self to be in such a bad state that it required a stay in a mental insitution for depression.] (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norah_Vincent)

The Game isn't a good place to start, it's more history and what happened than guidance.

Models by Mark Manson is probably the best place to start.

Does anyone have any expereince with this book?

How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships

"Older guy" here. Experience matters, but as with all things, it is much faster to learn with some guidelines. The sooner you hear this, the better:

1. Buy this, it's about proper pussy eating.
   
   
2. Learn to listen to a girl's reaction during sex.
   
   
3. Learn to be playful during sex. Gently slapping her face with your dick to punish her is a thing. It even works for killing LMR.
   
   
4. Learn to have proper communication/feedback about the whole experience afterwards.
   
   
5. Be a sex adventure provider. In the park, actively try to find a corner. In a concert, don't be afraid to put your hand between her legs (before that, look her in the eyes and say "stop me if I'm doing something you don't feel like").
   
   Do this with 2 different girls and you're set for life. "older" won't matter, won't let you take her comment like this.
   
   Bonus: Do /r/NoFap for extra energy. But this one is a tough one.

My recommendation is to head over to /r/NoFap and also check out No More Mr. Nice Guy.

r/seddit is for everybody. It's a pickup reddit. It's not specific to getting women.


That said, Magic Bullets was where I got my start. It's a book by the master PUA Savoy. It works on men just as well as on women.

A few thoughts. First off give yourself permission to grieve. You didn't get what you wanted and you're upset. You're going to to continue to be upset until you are ready to move on. There isn't anything anyone else can do to control your feelings. This is all in you.

Second if you really don't want to feel like this you're going to have to make some changes. This is a very painful lesson, but on the positive side you'll be a much happier person once you've made the right adjustments.

Here a book I found that taught me a lot: http://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-The-Mood-Therapy/dp/0380810336

You can also start talking with a therapist.

I guess the main point here is that only you have control over your feelings and only you have the power to stop feeling hurt. Sooner or later that will happen.

i agree that philosophy books are very important, but i found one self-help book really interesting. http://www.amazon.com/Self-Coaching-Powerful-Program-Depression-Completely/dp/0471768286

it really is an interesting book as it points out common insecurities within a person. it addresses them and allows you to work through it and ultimately be a more confident person. i think this book is essential if you ever find yourself insecure, depressed, anxious in any situation.

I'm thinking of this book, this book and this book

Read/Listen to these, do them:

• http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B005EOTH24?cache=c50f3e7759ba8a195914a6f793d34305&pi=SY200_QL40&qid=1405313431&sr=8-1#ref=mp_s_a_1_1
  
• http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B004C438CW?cache=c50f3e7759ba8a195914a6f793d34305&pi=AC_SX110_SY165_QL70&qid=1405313431&sr=8-4#ref=mp_s_a_1_4
  
• http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/042525318X?pc_redir=1405167671&robot_redir=1
  
• http://stronglifts.com/5x5/
  
• http://www.meetup.com

http://www.amazon.com/Models-Attract-Women-Through-Honesty/dp/1463750358

Read My Secret Garden ... It will give you an idea of how filthy girls are. Not every girl is going to have some of the very specific fetishes outlined here... but the overall point is: they're very hedonistic, and their minds are more graphic than ours.

Also read 50 Shades Of Grey. It's terrible. But you'll get a sense of what all the fuss is about. Notice the masculine - feminine polarity between the two.

Man up, approach and get over your fears. Learn from each failed approach and always remember, you're the fucking man.

Edit: Read this