Top products from r/dating

We found 38 product mentions on r/dating. We ranked the 48 resulting products by number of redditors who mentioned them. Here are the top 20.

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Top comments that mention products on r/dating:

u/Fey_fox · 4 pointsr/dating

Let’s talk reality here. You are not this man’s equal. To him you’re a pretty girl he can ‘break in’ and fuck, manipulate, and control, because you’re naive. He’s got money and experience, hence all the control in this potential relationship. Said he got divorced but you don’t know why do you? Not really. Could be this is a pattern and his wife found out.

Facts here. You are his coworker’s very young daughter. He’s only been working there a couple years which is a very short amount of time. This dude who waited for your dad to leave to hit on you is exhibiting Extremely Poor Judgement on so many levels. He’s risking you telling your dad which will probably fuck up their friendship, which is already fucked, your dad just doesn’t know it yet. Even if you do nothing or all the things with that guy, he is still the guy who went after his friend’s daughter behind his back.

I mean honestly, there’s no good way this will play out here. This dude is telling you want you want to hear (so mature and smart). Point is to make you feel good and valued, it’s the beginning of what’s called grooming. How will your dad feel if you say yes? Would you reject your dad for this man you honestly barely know? Btw the odds of your dad staying friends with this guy no matter what are not high, but you gotta decide who you want to be loyal to.

This isn’t going to last even if you do go. He’s 50+, in 20 years he could be in an assisted care facility. In 30 he will probably be dead. In 20 years you should be living your awesome life, maybe have kids or working a career you love or traveling or who knows… or you could be wasting your key years of young adultness on this old ass who is gonna manipulate you as long as he can.

I’m in my mid 40s, and young adults like you are very attractive. Y’all so filled with life and excitement, and there’s a thrill about beginning your life that many of us would like to re-experience. But people your are are basically baby adults. You have spent the majority of your life as a child. Your early 20s are key years where you learn what it is to be an adult. They may not be the best years of your life but what you do now will be the foundation of what will come. Because of that people my age should be mentors, not lovers.

I would strongly advise you not use this precious time and sabotage your relationships with your family and friends for some old dick.

So, IF YOU’RE GONNA DO IT ANYWAY, here’s my advice.

Do this only on your terms. Do not give him power over you. He wants what you are, that gives you bargaining power. He may offer money or gifts, be clear that if you accept that you don’t want to feel obligated to him for sex or time. Prioritize your life above everything. Don’t quit college if you’re in school and don’t quit your job if you have one. Even if he offers to pay for everything. The moment he does that for you, you lose all agency. Best advice my G-ma had was you should always have ‘mad money’ to get you out of any situation/relationship. Keep in contact with friends, don’t let him isolate you from everyone who loves you.

May/December relationships rarely last. Anything is possible but that doesn’t make it probable. Maybe this dude is legit and just happened to get a crush on a girl old enough to be his adult daughter and otherwise he’s healthy and stable. From the other side though, people who date young adults generally go through them like tissue leaving emotional damage wake behind them. You’re not on the same level, he has practice and knows exactly what to say to you to get you to melt. Sounds appealing until you figure out he’s just using you.

If you have any twinge of doubt, listen to it.

There’s a book I think all young people should read called The gift of fear. It covers situations like this.

Honestly if this dude was legit he would have talked to your dad, his friend, before making a pass.

Good luck.

u/Shanka29 · 1 pointr/dating

Age does not matter. I think a relationship can workout anytime but the probability is low because it is a young age and the people involved might have not thought through lots of aspects and maybe lack the maturity to have a successful relationship. You might feel the pressure to get into one but you should first try to understand why you feel that pressure... is it for the closure? the social image it projects?...etc

From a guy's point of view, I can't tell you what to do but I can definitely tell you what not to do as I have had some pretty terrible relationships. If you want to read more about those, I wrote a book named "10 Rules to A Happy Relationship"


This is the summary:

Did you ever live the perfect love story only to see it transform into a horrible nightmare?

Based on true stories, 10 Rules to A Happy Relationship delivers the comedic point of view of Michael, a pragmatic, male, feminist going through an abusive relationship.

Twenty-year-old Michael is a college athlete in Los Angeles with big dreams of pursuing a professional career. When the young man suffers a career-ending injury, he decides to go back to his hometown for rehabilitation. While in France, Michael meets the beautiful Veronica, a seemingly kind blond girl with whom he rapidly falls in love and begins a relationship. The newly-formed couple faces the challenges of a long-distance relationship when Michael must return to the USA to finish his degree. After going to great lengths to please Veronica, he returns to France for the greater good of his romance. Unfortunately for him, Veronica turns out to be abominable. From lies to threats and violence, Michael finds himself quickly overwhelmed by the French woman and her entourage.

10 Rules to A Happy Relationship uses a humorous first-person narrative to give an in-depth look at the transformation of Michael’s initial utopian view of love into a more accurate depiction of love in the 21st century. After touching several subjects from gender equality and personal identity to depression and narcissism amongst others, Michael outlines 10 rules to live a healthy relationship.

Hope this helps!

u/avocadoclock · 1 pointr/dating

>Why don't women ever seem interested in me?

You don't need to pick up on interest from girls to be successful at dating or make the first move.

>Maybe I should stop being super nice or something?

I recommend reading this book, No More Mr Nice Guy. You have to stop trying to please others and look after your own needs. It's not about being "nice". It's about how you treat or view relationships. "Being nice" doesn't earn you any kind of relationship.

> being in college it seems women are about half and half, still like being treated like shit like we are still high schoolers or actually enjoy someone who treats them right.

lol yeah I would recommend that book to you for sure

u/Burrito_Capital · 2 pointsr/dating

We can all struggle with that, so it is a normal thing to question our own value in my opinion. It's not normal in that situation to "realize" you are of "no value" and then trust that realization without reference... This is the equivalent of asking a dog about quantum theory and trusting the answer, but inside our heads this is what we in effect do. The emotional feeling of being worthless barks at our intellect, and our intellect interprets this as a truth, absurd when analyzed, so disregard it.

The Drama of the Gifted Child may be a good book to look at for you, interesting perspectives.

The moral emotions is an interesting read about why anger (or despair) can be so addicting and seem so "right" when it is happening.

The Happiness Hypothesis also by Jonathan Haidt is a great read about our emotions vs our intellect...

Tribe is a good read on finding where you fit, more related to soldiers and post combat, but apply it to your current situation and find your tribe.

Glad you are still with us, and no matter what you feel, you are not alone.

Edit: authors name from autocorrect purgatory...

u/damn_you_reddit_ · 3 pointsr/dating

The book is a little fluffy in parts, but has really solid advice.

"The conversations all hit a wall or the girl won't even message me even though she hit like on my profile and we matched."

What kind of messages are you sending? Can you give me an example? I've had that happen where you get liked but then they don't respond. There could be any number of reasons, while the desire for improvement is good most times you won't have any idea. Just let it go and don't take it personally.

No date and no sex, no big deal, don't let society try to make you think you are less of a man because of that. Dating is a skill which takes time to develop. What I'd suggest is always finding ways to be happy with yourself without anyone else. Walk into every interaction with the attitude of just trying to have fun, be positive, and don't have any concern for the outcome. Try different approaches, never take rejection personally, and hone your skills. Most importantly, don't exhibit clingy, needy behaviors. I know how loneliness goes, but be careful because if she senses neediness it will most likely drive her away.

u/[deleted] · 2 pointsr/dating

Cheesy title, but the advice is golden:

Additional stuff you need to understand:

Then, with confidence that you know more than any other young man in your school about people and about women, set aside all expectations, and allow this to unfold or not in a natural way.

And then, use this period of adolescence for what it's good at (it's not good at girls) and find yourself a spiritual life. Here's a good starting place:

Know this: A man with a spiritual center is more attractive to the kind of women worth one's time.

And this: Once you find a spiritual center, you'll be less interested in women. Ironically, this is the quality in a man that women find most attractive of all.

By the way, if you can stand all of this irony and paradox, you'll be much better prepared for being with a woman ;-).

u/GenConsensus · 2 pointsr/dating

Read these books:

No More Mr. Nice Guy
Daring Greatly
How to Win Friends and Influence People

While you do that, just make small talk to people. Not necessarily to people you're attracted to. You can keep it short, "nice bike", "nice dress", "do you have the time?", "do you know the way to x?", "know any good coffeeshop around here?"
Look people in the eye, don't break eye contact first, genuine smile.

You'll see that people are generally good. There'll always be assholes, you don't need them.

u/Frandaman760 · 1 pointr/dating

You sound like you are throwing in the towel, which I did for two years after 22 years of no action and much, much frustration. So I'm just gonna recommend three books that helped me out. I highly, highly recommend the first. The second is what got me out of my funk. These two books helped me understand women where before I frankly didn't know shit. The third one is great for confidence/self esteem, which can help anyone.

The Way of the Superior Man

How to be a 3% Man

6 Pillars of Self Esteem

I am aware of how cringey/snake oil'sy some of these books come off as(especially How to be a 3% Man), but they are good.

Edit: And if you aren't going to read any of this stuff, at least do yourself a favor and work on improving your posture. It makes a huge difference in how people respond to you.

u/sfghk · 2 pointsr/dating

This books gives me a good perspective and practice on how to feel balance and healthy while being single. All the best :)

How to Be Single and Happy: Science-Based Strategies for Keeping Your Sanity While Looking for a Soul Mate

u/STEVEHOLT27 · 1 pointr/dating

Let's cut through the vague descriptions from internet strangers and link you to the book, "No More Mr. Nice Guy"

TLDR: It's not your fault that you have "nice guy syndrome," but being a "nice guy" isn't actually "nice" for you or the people you're around. Once you deal with it, you'll be happier with yourself, you'll interact with others in a more authentic way (which they'll appreciate) and you'll be more attractive.

u/ShowerPell · 1 pointr/dating

Thank you, I think less is more. I think some girls are more into the time between texts game while other girls are willing to reply honestly and more freely.

Wouldn't it be nice if these women told you what they didn't like instead of just ghosting you? I did let it get to me pretty majorly at first -- this experience has taught me that I really need to improve on not giving a f*ck (just ordered this book)

u/Mlrkey · 3 pointsr/dating

You're 20 and presumably cute as fuck. Enjoy yourself. Do not be with someone that makes you feel like shit, nervous, anxious, etc... Be with someone that makes you feel secure and happy. Do yourself a favor and read this book: I wish I had read it when I was your age.

And if you ever want to message me just to chat feel free. I'm more than happy to help you out. Too many people trick themselves into thinking that they should stay with someone that makes them unhappy. They start coming up with excuses and then before you know it you've wasted 5 years. Then you have other people telling you dating is harder than it isn't. It's hard don't get me wrong but it's not impossible.

Right now you're focus should be on trying to figure out the kind of person you can see yourself staying with long term. That means experiencing a wide variety of people. Sure casual encounters aren't for everyone so if that isn't for you don't force yourself to do something you don't enjoy but you can still experience a wide range of people without needing to fuck a bunch.

u/joedrums8a · 4 pointsr/dating

Read the book "Attached" by Amir Levine & Rachel Heller

Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help YouFind - and Keep - Love

u/ZeeLiDoX · 1 pointr/dating

Check this book out

It helped my brother a lot.

You have to work on you first before you can find and make an "us" work.

Good luck.

u/ChickenHead415 · 3 pointsr/dating

You'll never get YOUR needs satisfied by being a "Nice Guy". That term is a joke anyway. I would read "No More Mr. Nice Guy" by Robert Glover. You seem to have quite a bit of resentment towards women. Also you being a virgin at 33. There's some major issues there.

u/whattodo-whattodo · 3 pointsr/dating

This has to be a joke.

The book Dataclysm shows statistics collected from online dating sites. As you can see the chart on the right shows which ages are most attractive to men as they age. Now it's horribly skewed because all of us men are stupid. But, it shows that a 28 year old guy is MOST interested in a girl your age.

So where can you find one? Anywhere. All of us. Just pick one! ;-p

u/StrangeGibberish · 1 pointr/dating

Looking into this guy. His youtube videos seem to be titled provocatively - with "Put her in her place" and "how to make her submit to you".

That said - he doesn't actually seem to be another misogynist PUA based on the video I'm watching. Not sure. More research may be needed.

u/Well_Sorted8173 · -1 pointsr/dating

Read the book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck

Spend some time watching Jordan Peterson on YouTube. Also, try reading his book 12 Rules for Life.

Change your life, change your way of thinking.

u/Tikibox · 2 pointsr/dating

M30 here
I remember when I had the same issue, I got a book on the history of the Samurai. I brought a highlighter and sticky notes to a cafe and tabbed the hell out of that book. I noted every clan, every distinction of the clan, famous swordmakers, beheading "showings". I took to those stories to heart. Those men exhibited such amazing discipline that I wanted to follow suit.

Aaaaaaand, when I met up with the chick, i would have the book in my bag. Eventually, she saw the book that was tabbed to hell. BOOM. She thought that was sexy as hell (don't stage it/force her to see it). She KNOWS that you have greater ambitions in life. That is pure catnip. ~10 years later and I still have that book. She isn't around, but that book is, and it is still catnip.

The trick is to maintaining a schedule time to devour the book. When she asks to hang out during that time (and she will target that time), tell her that you are a bit busy during that scheduled time. Say, "How about afterwards?"

Other good books about discipline:

Rules for a Knight

Man's search for meaning

Also, turn off your ringer/vibrate on your phone. Put that phone in a backpack. It took me until 23 to figure that one out. Ignore the phone. Why does she need an immediate response? She doesn't.
If she gets frustrated, she will take it out on you sexually. No joke. She will fight for your attention. Just keep up with that book. Even if you do get your intended reaction from her. You put that book down and you'll be worried all over again. Not fun, is it?

If she is really young, she might try to make you jealous. If that is the case, she is bad news. I doubt that you will get here, but it is a red flag to remember. Find another girl who will see that tabbed book. Profit$$$