Top products from r/infj

We found 30 product mentions on r/infj. We ranked the 186 resulting products by number of redditors who mentioned them. Here are the top 20.

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Top comments that mention products on r/infj:

u/Fenzir · 8 pointsr/infj

I detest games in dating... but there are definite pitfalls to spilling it all off the bat. I've been in a casual relationship where we each went full transparency upon first meeting. It worked to an extent, but it also destroys any semblance of mystery. Part of dating is getting to know the other person and them getting to know you. Trust and love are built through experience and time together.

A month or two ago, someone posted something about discovering the INFJ strength in dating... which was being mysterious. I can't remember who, but it resonated with me. He said he'd been finding much more dating success by slowly revealing who he was and how he felt. Not so much manipulating as just not going full glom off the bat, if he likes someone.

Mark Manson's book, Models, makes some very good points and introduces some solid techniques for dating with authenticity, too. It's geared toward men, but I think much of the information is applicable to anyone. The first 15% of the book is pretty self-promotey, and there are some misogynistic generalizations here and there, but it was worth my time. Much of it is about building confidence just by being yourself and taking a zen - like approach of being grateful for any response to a declaration of interest. I'm into you! You're into me? Cool, let's see where it goes. Not into me? Cool, thanks for not letting me waste my time chasing you. I feel like it's a healthy version of playing it cool, without lying or repressing yourself.

u/mojomonday · 5 pointsr/infj

For sure.

I'm happy you found a therapist who helped you navigate through your difficulties. If you could analyze what your therapist did to help you recover, that will help too.

Firstly, my toolkit involves using a combination of meditation and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). To successfully execute CBT, you need to be self-aware and mindful. Practice both together. This is important because when you're able to catch yourself thinking negatively, or start having unwanted thoughts, you're able to identify it and be aware of it's presence. Once you "catch" these thoughts, debate with yourself logically why those thoughts are irrational. The book I read was Feeling Good by David Burns.

Initially, this will be very hard, and it takes a lot of work, but it gets easier and easier once you master it, and trust me when I say this, the ROI for working on this is literally priceless. Took me a consistent 3 years of practicing everyday to pull me out of darkness.

Gradual therapy, slowly exposing yourself to things that scare you. For me the big one was social anxiety and fear of rejection. I made it a mission to go outside everyday just to be in the presence of others. Doing things I like outside with other people. I go to the gym, play pickup soccer and basketball.

Putting yourself first. INFJs love to put others first. Don't do that until you satisfy your needs. Be assertive with what you want and communicate it to others. It seems counter-intuitive, and feels like you're being selfish, but people respect people who hold their ground and provide for themselves first. Your confidence will soar from this. Which has a multiplier effect onto everything you do.

Stoic philosophy. The basis of this philosophy is to only put your energy towards things you can control. Things that you can realistically do right now to change the situation. Things out of your control, for example, other people's thoughts and feelings, the weather, the stock market, be quick to realize a situation you can't control and push it out of your peripheral. Life is too short so don't waste your time on it.

Exercise consistently & keep your diet in check. a must if you're serious about improving yourself. ROI is also priceless and kills many birds with one stone. (self-esteem, confidence, health, mood, sleep, relationships)

Good luck and be very patient. Sometimes you will feel like it's not working, but keep at it and only evaluate yourself after 6 months on your progress, because progress is slooooooow. I guarantee you using the combination factors above will move the needle more positively. If you have any more questions feel free to ask.

u/[deleted] · 6 pointsr/infj

I like Camus a lot, but his prose is super hard to read sometimes. I don't really like Nietzsche; he's a massive fucking dick. I like Camus leagues more because Camus explains things and leads you to his conclusion while Nietzsche just preaches and rambles on about how much he hates this or that and how stupid this or that is.

Not all of these called themselves philosophers, but here's some I like:

I'm not stoic by any means, but I love Marcus Aurelius's Meditations. I think it's interesting how someone could write musings that are relevant millennia later.

John Milton wrote Paradise Lost, but he has a ton of prose too. Here's a book full of it along with annotations and modernized grammar. Milton wasn't the most satisfactory person, but his writing is incredible.

I haven't read this myself, but a friend of mine really liked Man's Search for Meaning by Frankl. Some of his friends called him pretentious for reading the book though (I wasn't one of them).

If you like Camus, you'll probably like Sartre's Existentialism is a Humanism. Again, I haven't read it myself, but it was also recommended to me because I like Camus.

Jean-Paul Marat was a journalist during the French Revolution, but his writings sometimes crossed into philosophical territory. He was a huge populist, and I love his work when he's not calling for the deaths of hundreds of people. You can read some of it here.

I'm huge into theology, so I love Thomas Aquinas. He wrote a lot about theology and Christianity and was a major Christian apologist. He also dabbled in theodicy. Smart man.

And to mix it up, here's one I haven't checked out but is top on my list: Sor Juana Inés de la Cruz's Selected Works. She was a writer and a nun from Spain who was self-taught--all qualities you usually don't find in philosophers, so she'll be a unique read.

u/Dialogue_Dub · 1 pointr/infj

With only my phone on me, I'm just going to list out some of the non-fiction I've enjoyed on my commute recently.

Smoke Gets in Your Eyes: And Other Lessons from the Crematory - Caitlin Doughty Great reading for the morbidly inclined.

Silver Screen Fiend: Learning About Life from an Addiction to Film - Patton Oswalt I would only recommend this book for true cinema fans. It's enjoyable if you get the references and are also a procrastinating creative.

God'll Cut You Down: The Tangled Tale of a White Supremacist, a Black Hustler, a Murder, and How I Lost a Year in Mississippi - John Safran sort of reminds me of Jon Ronson. Good true crime, fish out of water stuff.

Yes Please - Amy Poehler Great advice, hilarious. Get it on audiobook.

Carsick - John Waters John waters being John Waters.

Manson - Jeff Guinn A super fascinating breakdown of the 1960s, and the environment that held Manson is much is a biography. I'm really excited to read his new book his writing about Jim Jones and the 1970's.

Currently on Girl in a Band by Kim Gordon, very excited about it.

u/rivercookies · 1 pointr/infj

You might find the following book to be of some interest. It's given me a pretty good lens to view behaviour like this through. It's not perfect and tends towards oversimplification but the core idea is pretty simple and compelling: Hope you feel better soon!

u/Lat3nt · 8 pointsr/infj

Personally, I've never encountered that. Though that is probably due to a massive dose of impression management. I try to walk around as confident as possible even when that might not be the case. If you haven't read it--What Every Body is Saying by Joe Navarro is a fantastic book on how to read people--but you can also use it in the reverse to appear the way that you want.

If I'm not with people I know well in public, generally speaking I am quite cold with people. I guess I learned to hide my emotions pretty well. I think most people also don't understand me, as I keep info about me on a very need-to-know basis. So for better or for worse, people give me space.

I don't know if any of this helps at all, but I noticed a pretty immediate positive change controlling the way I appeared to other people. Not just in the way that people reacted to me, but in my confidence as well. It seems you actually can fake it until you make it.

u/omgtigers · 10 pointsr/infj

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking was a pretty good read recommended to me by another introverted INFJ friend of mine. Although it isn't specifically about INFJs, it is all about the "I", and I came away with some new ideas.

u/ilawlfase · 1 pointr/infj

Evil Genius was pretty good in my book. [haha unintentional pun] There are two other books in the series as well. The second was pretty good...and since I just found out theres a thiiiiird. I'll be making my way over toward that one shortly

u/wishywashywasfulness · 1 pointr/infj

These have recently changed my life/perspective.

Maps of Meaning (This is the only philosophy that has deeply resonated with my own perception of reality/the world)

Untethered Soul (Mind bending, gives you perception tools to help increase your focus and will power)

Flowers For Algernon (Emotionally powerful, invoked a sense of gratitude and feeling less alone)

The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up (A little more practical in nature but getting a handle of my "stuff" allowed me room and space to get a better handle of the rest of my life)

u/drwicked · 1 pointr/infj

I hate when people say "I feel the same way" because no, you don't, no one does, but I wanted to say "me too". I got to Dr. Aaron by way of Quiet by Susan Cain. I just had my first ever therapy session and it was good but I feel like it will be too expensive to get the hours and hours of talking that I need to do. Thanks for existing.

u/Lamzn6 · 2 pointsr/infj

Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help YouFind - and Keep - Love

u/ajmmin · 5 pointsr/infj

Mark Manson is pretty great. He started out as a pickup artist, but quickly realized how awful and insincere most of that community is. He then wrote "Models," which is one of the best books I've ever read on being open and honest with yourself and others. It really transcended its roots, which is why he eventually distanced himself from the community and started his blog. He, along with Brene Brown, really turned my life around when I was in a dark place.

u/chaseburger_ · 2 pointsr/infj

Oh man I'm the exact same way. Read an interesting book about attachment styles though and it really helped me understand what might be the root of the problem, which is that growing up I didn't have a solid attachment to my parents (I mean growing up as in basically infancy). Anyways I highly recommend the book...

Attached by Amir Levine

u/MyBees · 2 pointsr/infj

I know you're in reading recovery, but have you read Red Queen???


u/RollingRoman · 1 pointr/infj

Hey, guys! I've just read a book about morning routine and it helped a lot. It's short but has all the essential information to make the morning routine that really alleviates your lifestyle. Hope this will help you


u/Kellivision · 5 pointsr/infj

Recommended Reading:

u/M364N · 4 pointsr/infj

I just found this subreddit today and it feels so nice to be around people who think in the same way! My counselor told me about "Attached" and I couldn't put it down when I read it. You will understand a little more about this when you read it, but I realized I'm an anxious type and I had a pattern of dating avoidants, which was a terrible time. My bf now is secure and everything is so much more stable and he's able to reassure my insecurities, though it seemed less exciting at first. Here's a link to the book:

u/southpawed · 4 pointsr/infj

I would also add to this, that her book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking is also a thoroughly good read.

u/Tusktopia · 4 pointsr/infj

I recommend this book: What Every Body is saying
> Joe Navarro, a former FBI counterintelligence officer and a recognized expert on nonverbal behavior, explains how to "speed-read" people: decode sentiments and behaviors, avoid hidden pitfalls, and look for deceptive behaviors. You'll also learn how your body language can influence what your boss, family, friends, and strangers think of you.

u/tasteface · 6 pointsr/infj

Practicing forgiveness has really helped me deal with feelings of hurt and resentment. Well, that's not true. Practicing forgiveness actually changed my life, not just "helped". It gave me new perspectives and tools to understand myself and others, and how to regulate my expectations, emotions, and reactions toward negative situations/people.

Forgiveness doesn't mean condoning what happened. It means releasing yourself from being trapped by what happened. It is a gift you give yourself (and maybe others). You can forgive someone without ever talking to them again.

I recommend:

Forgiveness is a Choice (Robert Enright)

Forgive for Good