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Have you heard of the book "Non Violent Communication" by Marshall Rosenburg? If you want to resolve things yourself, this is a great tool. This is the kind of thing a therapist would walk you through step by step, to solve communication issues, but it's possible to do it on your own. It's not possible to "bypass" the talking with karezza, but one can definitely encourage the other! You are doing great just by refraining from PMO and doing the cuddling thing. You're showing her your own dedication and interest in healing your relationship, which in turn will support her efforts to heal herself.

Check out the print book from Marnia (the creator of www.reuniting.info) because in the back there is a 3-week course of sorts with nightly exchanges that do wonders for developing a natural desire for karezza. Honestly, I wouldn't suggest doing karezza without going through those steps.

[Cupid's Poisoned Arrow: From Habit to Harmony in Sexual Relationships] (https://www.amazon.com/dp/1556438095/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_xg6KybS72VFRD)

Edit: Didn't see that you mentioned CPA already. Have you tried doing the exchanges?

Edit 2: For encouragement, my girlfriend at first wasn't really enjoying it, but then we both felt some sort of relaxation, and since then she's said it's the best sex she's ever had.

It's $9.99 on the amazon kindle/cloud reader (read in your web browser, no kindle needed).

http://www.amazon.com/Cupids-Poisoned-Arrow-Relationships-ebook/dp/B003WUYP9M

I think it's worth it, because you'll get tons of little details that people probably wouldn't write in a short reddit comment.

Alternatively, you can also read the FAQ (http://www.reddit.com/help/faqs/karezza) and see if that helps you to get started.

And we're happy to help with specific issues once you get going or get stuck.

I was on the combination of venlafaxine XR and bupropion XL for a long time so I think I can relate. My sex drive was killed a few years earlier with a combination of fluoxetine and aripriprazole. One of the main reasons I had switched medications was that I thought my sex drive would return but alas, no luck. Before any AD's I had a very high sex drive. Now I enjoy sex but I don't seek it. I also experience increased difficulty getting off and I have an extreme orgasm hangover. Karezza has been a much more whole experience. As someone with chronic depression, I often feel a hole in myself, as if I'm incomplete. Karezza fills this hole and makes me feel more connected, more at ease with life, more loving.

I would highly highly recommend starting the bonding behavior schedule indicated in this book. Increased bonding behaviors and karezza even out the dopamine spikes and crashes that make depression so chaotic.

Monk mode? You'll need a partner to practice karezza. Anyway check out: https://www.amazon.com/Cupids-Poisoned-Arrow-Harmony-Relationships/dp/1556438095