Top products from r/ploungeafterdark

If you're looking at around-the-house objects, you're not gonna find what you want. You're not even supposed to use a run of the mill waterproof vibrator up your tailpipe because they're made of hard plastic.

What you're looking for is something soft. Your body moves and squeezes and gives, so you need something small or something with body-safe silicone, preferably both.

Ebay's got plugs for $5 or less, with free shipping. There's really no excuse to not do your dang research and find something for you. Heck, there's places online where you can get all sorts of different toys if you save up for a bit.

And you're going to want lube to go with your new toy. Use a water-based lubricant, because silicone based lubes may interact with your toy and screw it up. Also, you're almost certainly going to want toy covers and cleaner. You can use cheap condoms as toy covers; just pull them over the toy when you're ready to play, have your fun, then peel the cover off and throw it away. Easy.

It's also really easy to try this in the bathtub, as the hot water helps you relax and makes clean up much easier. You'll need to relax and go slow your first time. Don't rush; you'll get there. Listen to your body and don't stress about size at first. Start with something reasonable.

If you try something small, make sure it has a base or a cord so you can't lose it. The same is true with small, egg-shaped vibrators; always get one with a cord instead of the cordless so you can always get it back out. Losing something inside yourself is not a fun trip to the ER. It's mortally embarassing for you, just another aggravating Tuesday night for them.

Back to clean up for a moment. You can usually wash most silicone toys in the dishwasher, but I'm guessing you're young and share your home with your family, so this may not be an option for you. Boiling your toy will kill anything you may get on it, but make sure you use plenty of water. If your toy touches the edge or bottom of the pot, it may melt a bit before you notice. It's not good for the toy or the pot, and here again is a good reason why it's smart to start small.

Now, assuming you order discreetly online and go pretty bargain basement about it, you can order a basic plug, lube, and possibly a lube shooter for about $15 total. If you want to get latex gloves and lube to try fingering with, that's even cheaper.

But if you're really looking for the most amount of bang for your buck, try a Tenga Egg instead. They're usually around $7 or less, you can order them for less on ebay, most sex stores carry them, and they are amazing. They're easy to clean, reusable to a point (they do stretch a bit after a while), and they come with enough lube to get you started. They feel wonderful, and you can masturbate with all of the regular techniques your body is already used to, or you can mix it up a bit and try something new. They're also small and easy to hide. I don't know why parents don't just hand these things out to teenage kids and let them go to town with 'em. Seriously, get a Tenga Egg. Don't shove it up your bum.

So, to recap:

1. Only use soft, forgiving things for anal play.
   
2. Get relaxed and lube well.
   
3. Start with something reasonably sized.
   
4. Relax and take your time.
   
5. Only use water based lube with silicone toys.
   
6. Only use toys that have a wide base or a cord so you can get it back out when you're done.
   
7. Boil your toys or use the dishwasher if you know your toy is dishwasher safe. You can also buy toy cleaner spray.
   
8. Try a Tenga Egg.
   
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   Edit: Hell, you can make your own pocket pussy with two sponges, a rubber glove, a cup, and some rubber bands. There's plenty of tutorials online, and you can get supplies for those at any dollar store. You can even soak it in warm water so the sponges make it feel nice and warm.

HA! And after our long discussion all those months ago about how you would never reciprocate sexually! I told you it's a lot of fun!

I recently got this and have found it to be wonderful. It stays in with no problems and it's got some strong vibes. I've got two other butt vibes and this is my favorite.

Also currently waiting on something from Bad-Dragon... Mmmmm..

Seatie praising it some more?

Its damn good for 20 bucks and primeable!

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B002GHIPYI/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Just over a year ago I did a bunch of research in audiophile subreddits and fourms. These were the best 'budget' headphones that kicked ass. If i remember correctly they were like "Just get these until you are willing to spend $200+. and even then these superlux make some $200 headphones sound like crap"

I don't use them anymore because I ended up getting a wireless headset a few months ago. But my g/f uses them everyday and loves them. They are still holding up well even after a year and half of ownership and abuse.

Hey Betty

• This book
  
• That's a silly question... I love it. Seriously though, depends who I'm with. Max of 4-5 though.
  
• One thing I don't know is what that question means.

It's free on KU if you're interested.

As am I.

This looks just as... interesting.

I've received that book as a joke.

Twice.

It reads seriously. But I've never attempted to cook something from it.

It has a companion bartenders book.

I found this for under 30USD. This is about as cheap as coffeemaking gets unless you want Turkish coffee.

fucking Waffle Crisp yo

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003JI4Q50/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o01_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

I am between the ages of 9 and 99.

Tough either a small glass bubble one that you can freeze but it doesn't stay to cold for to long which I'll use on myself from time to time or this

Here's volume 1. And I just realised I spent £63 on this. Well, I suppose that's what happens when I set a hard limit for total money spent on xmas, and get the rest of my family presents with a lot left over.

http://www.amazon.com/Testor-Corp-3501-Plastic-Cement/dp/B0006NDZIA/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1370991015&sr=8-5&keywords=testors+glue

This shit. I have a few tubes and I've heard it's possible to get high off of sniffing it, but I'd rather use it for its intended purpose.

Dang, I found one a little while ago that I kinda wanted but this is all I can find. It was twice as wide and had a little lower shelf that had a place for your printer or something... I dunno.