Reddit reviews The Voice of the Heart

I'm not female, but I have more romantic sensibilities. I would advise to fight sin it as sin in any other way. I mean, realizing the potential devastating consequencs it has and how the human heart turns all "small" sins into larger idols. It's easier to fight now than it ever will be, so arm yourself. I don't intend this to be a "just stop" comment, but at the same time, I feel it worth encouraging you to fight, knowing you have no guilt in Christ and He (and what He has ordained for your marriage) is better than anything else.

A couple of resources that have helped me:

1. The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment. The Purtians are so practical when it comes to godly living. I've found this a helpful book that has rooted out patterns in my life that I didn't even know were there. It helps me to be so mindful of "discontent" in my life - a word that implies much more than we realize. For that matter, pair it up with the Valley of Vision, because those prayers are so good at orienting the heart toward God.
   
2. The Voice of the Heart. The main point here is this: we are embodied and therefore emotional beings. We in the intellectually rich Reformed tradition (and i'ts children) try to rationally fight everything. But in reality, you need the power of the Spirit, a healthy body, mental stability, AND good rational thinking - you are all of those things. This is a helpful resource for emotions, which we as Christians need a better toolbelt for dealing with. This book's main point is that emotions are an expression of the heart and we don't always know what they mean. Exploring and discovering the hearts many root realities that express themselves as or give rise to emotions is the step we must take before we can apply God's truth and really fight sin or find healing effectively.
   
   Note on that final thought: there are three negative realities we have. They are sin, wounds, and weaknesses. You repent of sin, but you don't repent of a wound. You seek healing for wounds, but you don't need "healing", strictly speaking, for sin. And you strengthen your weaknesses, but you don't need more strength to overcome a wound. The point here is that there is a God given way of addressing each of these realities and confusing them can be dangerous. For instance, someone repenting of a wound probably has issues with viewing themselves in light of God's love and the gospel - and is probably feeding that in the process.
   
   Counseling or talking with a good friend about why you are drawn to another will help uncover some root causes. And only then will you have enough clarity to fight or find healing in a positive way.
   
   Hope this helps.