Reddit reviews The Mindful Way through Anxiety: Break Free from Chronic Worry and Reclaim Your Life

The problem when you quit something that was a habit or that was a large part of how you defined yourself, is coming up with something to replace it. The only way to do this is by trying everything and anything, this is the only way to know if you like something or not. No offence to gamers, but it won't bring you long term happiness. Socialising, interacting with people, volunteering, real life experiences, those give you long term happiness. Sharing your life with people, being accepted, and accepting others brings you happiness. The problem online and in video games is the inability to perceive the other people as real people, and will continue to mark the way in which the community interacts with each other.

Many people who have an addictive personality will switch between gaming, the internet, porn, and substance abuse to feed their addiction. When one becomes boring, it's easier to switch to something else you're addicted to instead of examining your addiction or looking at why you are addicted.

Many people who have addictive personalities do so as a means of escapism, so that they don't have to deal with the real life problems or examine what it is about their lives that is leaving them wanting more. The problem with addiction is that it never really fills the void, it's a temporary fix that will always leave you wanting more or looking elsewhere to fill it.


http://zenhabits.net/the-ultimate-guide-to-motivation-how-to-achieve-any-goal/

http://www.positivityblog.com/index.php/2007/06/13/25-simple-ways-to-motivate-yourself/

And here is a self help book that will help motivate yourself, and look at your life from a different angle, as well as give you some tools to break free of the cycle you are in.

The Mindful Way through Depression: Freeing Yourself from Chronic Unhappiness

Here is one for anxiety The Mindful Way through Anxiety

The guided meditation serves to help you focus. It helps you learn self control, discipline. It also helps you learn to be able to stop your internal dialogue at will, so when you start getting into your habitual routine of negative self talk, or rewarding yourself with your addiction, you are equipped better to deal with it. Perception, addiction, it shows the power of the mind. If you can train your mind, you can overcome nearly anything.

Feeling bad and feeling good take the same amount of effort, what matters is what you emphasize. As we grow throughout our lives we tell ourselves we are a certain way, and reinforce this by habitual thinking and acts. Other people develop an idea of who they think we are, and they too will reinforce these ideas on you. It is important to remember that in the same way we developed ideas on the world and who we are, bit by bit, day by day, it is possible in the same way to change these ideas. They aren't static, you are constantly growing and changing. Change is hard, because it's new. Habits are comfortable because we know how they work, we know the outcomes. We need to constantly push ourself out of our boundaries if we ever truly want to discover who we are.

You are an addict. You basically rewire your brain to go back to the same experience over and over again, because you know you will get the same results. The more you train your brain through a repetitive action, the easier it is for you to use it. You have to learn to be able to stop yourself, it isn't easy. Day by day, with enough practice like riding a bike, you can learn to do it. Commit yourself to quitting, as much as you commit yourself to being rewarded with reddit. If it took you 5 years to get to this point, it isn't going to happen in 15 days, a month, or maybe even a year. I'm not sure about you, but some people have replaced reality for a website, and that isn't healthy.

You can do it, if you believe in yourself as much as your parents, people who love you, or even I do, you will be able to overcome your addiction. It may be helpful for you to see someone who specializes in internet addiction, or treatment centers that are expensive like www.netaddictionrecovery.com

May you follow on paths with strength

Edit: Forgot a word. Most of this is applicable to any addict. You are are in a constant battle with yourself. You either use your mind to rise above it, or it will control your mind.

Sex is the least of your worries. And believe it or not, if your wife is not being as supportive as she can, your relationship is not even your number one priority.

I know this from experience. When I was 27, I went through an extremely difficult time with anxiety and panic attacks, which developed into a severe panic disorder with as side of agoraphobia.

Unfortunately, NONE of all the medical (and psychological) professionals I saw at that time helped too much. It took a good seven years (after I moved to a major metropolitan area) for me to find a psychologist who understood anxiety.

You need to solve this issue first. What worked for me was cognitive therapy. It takes time. It takes work. It takes dedication.

With time, you will be able to successfully to train yourself to reframe how you view everything in order to break out of the vicious circle where anxiety begets more anxiety. Cognitive Therapy treatment is backed by decades of research. Drugs (used an adjunct) might be helpful. But you need to have the one that works for you (for whatever it's worth, Klonopin was effective for me). But as you improve, you can SLOWLY (that is key!) titrate your dosage until it's zero.

Why not start here for more information:

http://www.panicattackrecovery.com/cognitive-behavioral-therapy-anxiety.html

http://www.amazon.com/The-Mindful-Way-through-Anxiety/dp/1606234641

You are supposed to slowly remove the armor. Instead of being afraid (this creates anxiety) of being pierced, learn to tolerate being pierced, learn to be ok with discomfort. It is a paradox: resistance to the discomfort is actually what makes it so painful, this increases resistance and creates a vicious loop of hypersensitivity and pain. Anxiety is a flavor of life. Learn to savor it.
I can recommend https://www.amazon.com/Mindful-Way-through-Anxiety-Chronic/dp/1606234641/ and https://www.amazon.com/Mindful-Path-through-Shyness-Mindfulness-ebook/dp/B0055PMSAU/

I worked with a grad student finishing her Phd in psychology for one year. I'd been incorrectly diagnosed with OCD for 25 years and put on medication & therapy. She properly diagnosed me with OCPD and we used a process of mindfulness to treat it. I had the luxury of being retired and was able to devote my efforts full time to this. One year and 22 sessions later my anxiety & OCPD behaviors dropped away and no more meducations. I'm still amazed and practice mindfulness daily.

We used this book as the basis for treatment: https://www.amazon.com/Mindful-Way-through-Anxiety-Chronic/dp/1606234641

http://www.amazon.com/Mindful-Way-through-Anxiety-Chronic/dp/1606234641
http://www.amazon.com/Mindfulness-Acceptance-Workbook-Anxiety-Commitment/dp/1572244992/

When I discussed meditation with my therapist she actually recommended 'The Mindful Way through Anxiety' before I started, as many people with anxiety can get overwhelmed and quit early. I highly recommend the book!

I suffered with pretty significant anxiety into my mid-twenties. CBT helped to a large extent and kind of took the edge off, but adding mindfulness to the equation was the key to overcoming it. This is the program I used, which has a lot of the same elements as CBT. Another option.

I would definitely talk with your GP or whoever prescribed your lexapro. I started off on 10 mg a day and was bumped up to 20 mg, which seems to be a good place for me right now. In addition to the meds though I've also been in and out of therapy to help learn techniques for coping and learning to address particular patterns of thinking that were making anxiety worse. (For example, being able to point to a thought pattern and saying "Aha, you are catastrophizing!" can help me stop the Anxiety Death Spiral.)

I don't have much experience with anxiety attacks since my anxiety is more low-level and chronic with some worse flare-ups, so take my advice with a saltshaker handy. I've had some success with practicing mindfulness and have so far really enjoyed the book The Mindful Way through Anxiety (here's the book's website, and here is the Amazon page). You do not have to be Buddhist or anything-ist to practice and benefit from mindfulness.

You may also be interested in what the Anxiety and Depression Association of America has to say about dealing with panic/anxiety attacks.

Best of luck! I know it's scary but you're definitely not alone and anxiety can be managed. It's just the trick of finding what works for your brain chemistry, psychology, and living situation.