Reddit reviews Mr. Unavailable and the Fallback Girl: The Definitive Guide to Understanding Emotionally Unavailable Men and the Women that Love Them
We found 3 Reddit comments about Mr. Unavailable and the Fallback Girl: The Definitive Guide to Understanding Emotionally Unavailable Men and the Women that Love Them. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.
Used Book in Good Condition
Sounds like you are the Fallback Girl, the real thing you need to figure out is why? If you don't figure out what made you stick with a guy like this chances are you will pick another and another.
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Thank you for responding. I do have someone now that I love and trust and that treats me with respect, we are just going through a tough time and were discussing separating (our 4 yr old has Autism and it is very stressful to balance everything).
I swore I would block him, no access, no explanation, goodbye, or closure.
Then, the last thing I did (I know it was dumb after the fact) was tell him that I should have walked away when he told me he had lied and he WAS seeing someone exclusively. I apologized to HIM for HIM lying to me. I feel like such a fool now but thank GAWD for the internet. I found that their was a book called: http://www.amazon.com/Mr-Unavailable-Fallback-Girl-Understanding/dp/1450540392
and I didn't even read the book, just clips from the 2nd edition, and it all made so much sense that I could FINALLY see that it was my own self esteem that kept driving the responses.
It has been 2, almost 3 days since my little "walk away" message, to which he responded he was "sorry". I still have that pit in my stomach...like I want him to try and contact me just so I can go out on my own terms. But, like you said...giving him NO access IS my own terms. I kept my heart guarded for so long, and I used to refuse his advances and flirt chat. But something about this year made me realize I hadn't heard from him in a LONG time and I excused trying to hunt him down as "making sure he was ok and happy". Pffffft. I set myself up for that one.
I found him through LinkedIn and it started off chatting, talking about meeting up (he is, luckily 4+ hours away) but then it got to "old times" and before I knew it I sent him a picture of my in lingerie I had bought 10 years ago WITH him. #1 because I have worked really hard to get my body to wear it is and I'm proud and get no recognition other than from people who haven't seen me in a long time, but also #2 because I was trying to tempt him. And I ended up exposing myself and walking away with nothing. It's totally degraging.
How do you "Guard" your heart? Maybe I live with my emotions on my sleeve too much or maybe I just jump into old bad habits because that is all I know with him, but I just can't seem to close the door AND LOCK it.
I would love to chat, I am sorry that you have been through this too. No one deserves to be treated this way and I need to stop convincing myself that I can turn the tables and be the one in control. I can't believe that 15 years have gone by and my heart still sinks when I think of this guy. Does it ever end?
XOXO and thanks again for sympathizing.